While you may have external characteristics a person wishes to emulate (e.g., fitness, hard work, positive interpersonal relationships), the most powerful commitments have their origins deep within you.

The Seven Commitments of a Leader 

1. Commitment to work - while our culture emphasizes leisure, we were created to work, to make a difference in the world around us.  Leaders understand this and work hard at what they do. 
2. Commitment to emotional intelligence - knowing how to relate well to others and to take their concerns into account is essential to valuing others and letting them know they matter.  Leaders connect with those around them.
3. Commitment to doing things well - if something is worth doing, it is worth doing well.  Leaders know that a shortcut is often the surest path to a dead end.
4. Commitment to admitting mistakes - power brings with it the opportunity to blame others and to fool oneself into believing that others are fooled as well.  Leaders know that perfection is the goal, but that pretending to be perfect only magnifies one's failings.
5. Commitment to lifelong learning - formal education and degrees have their place, but lifelong learners don't need a professor to teach them or a classroom to focus their attention on improvement.  Leaders keep learning and encourage others around them to do the same.
6. Commitment to a balanced life - employment is one part of life, but it isn't life.  Healthy leaders know how to balance life at work with life outside - recognizing that there are stages of imbalance that make greater balance possible over the long run.
7. Commitment to admirable character - integrity, honesty, trustworthiness are all part of character that is built over a lifetime, but can be lost in a moment of indiscretion.  Leaders know that ending well is essential to leaving a legacy to those that follow.

Six Steps to Increasing Your Referent Power

1. Give yourself a grade for each of the seven commitments.
2. Ask those who know you best and those who love you deeply (that may be two sets with some overlapping participants) to grade you as well.
3. Then determine which commitment you need to give attention to and develop behavioral commitments that will grow this area in your life.
4. Allow someone else to hold you accountable to your commitments.
5. As you improve in an area, choose another to focus on and repeat the process.
6. Every twelve months determine your trajectory.

When a leader exhibits these seven commitments, he has ever-increasing referent power.  Others will be drawn to him and want to be like him.

Rather than fearing referent power or denying its reality through false humility, celebrate that there are people who want to be like you and give them reason to want this more.

At Julian Consulting we work with leaders to experience professional AND personal success!  We can guide you through this process of growth.  Call us TODAY for assistance in increasing your referent power!