| Sure grace or soor grapes? |
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I was struck by the grace in defeat shown recently by Scotland's elder statesman of football, Motherwell manager Craig Brown.
His side had lost 3-2 against Hibs in their opening home match of the new SPL season earlier this month.
His patience was tested to the limit after Motherwell were denied two penalties and Hibernian gained from a blatant handball when the visitors scored their second goal.
After the final whistle, Craig looked up from his seat and appealed to the assembled media: "Please praise Hibs for their performance and comeback."
The Edinburgh club's Euro adventure had just ended with a 6-2 defeat.
Conceding only that the referee "didn't have one of his best games," he went on to say, "Craig (also the ref's name) is a good referee and I don't want to criticise him. I hate to do that. We fault ourselves for not finishing the job."
Grace -defined as courteous goodwill, favour or elegance of manner - builds trust, respect, co-operation and loyalty from the people around you.
A sure grace mindset:
- asks 'what can I learn from this setback?'
- gives credit where it is due and plays up people's strengths
- forgives an offence early.
A 'soor grapes' attitude, on the other hand:
- shifts the blame onto others
- finds fault and homes in on people's weaknesses
- bears grudges.
Just as overdoing real soor grapes causes discomfort, so too does overindulging in the attitudinal sense.
It can cause 'relational indigestion' - dysfunction in teams and difficulty in inspiring change, not to mention mental stress and physical problems.
As the ancient proverb goes, 'The tongue of the wise brings healing.'
I believe that this wisdom in speech - sure grace in action - affects the wellbeing and success not only of the recipient, but also the speaker.
Something to chew on as the new business season gets underway. |
