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Story Sparks
"Stories are the sparks that light our ancestor's lives, the embers we blow on to illuminate our own"
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Greetings!
If I fix it, I take away your chance to use the tools you think fit best to repair it as you'd like. If I fix it, I deprive you of the knowledge you can think and act creatively, find inspiration in the depths of disappointment. You might well resent my meddling in this building project called "your life."
I won't be a fixer because I can't and I shouldn't. Neither will I let my eyes belie a patronizing attitude about your lack of builder skills. But I will loan you tools and wisdom of my experience and be your finest "go-for" ever, to offer what you need to remodel this hard time into a living space of open, soaring ceilings held firm by strong, protective walls.
When I wrote those words I was thinking of moments when I'd come home from a long day at work, plop down on the couch and complain about this or that. Jerry, being a builder and a fixer, would then proceed to tell me what I should have done or could have done or might still do. But I'd counter his suggestions saying "You don't know what it's like" or "You don't understand," both of which were true. Sometimes we'd even argue, imagine that.
What it took me awhile to figure out - both of us to figure out - is that I didn't want him to fix my life. I wanted him to listen, to just walk beside me and let me eventually figure it out myself. Over time we had code words to let him know when I really did want his "fixing" skills; but mostly, I wanted a friend, someone to walk beside me.
I remember those fixings and how easily resentment builds by my telling my friend going through a tough time what she might do to make her life easier or suggest to a grieving friend what he might do to relieve the pain. I could easily wear out a friend of mine too if I'm not clear about what I want and maybe they'll be resentful that I keep crying about my problems but never do what they suggest! My sister used to call and ask what she should do about this and that and say to me, "You're a counselor! Tell me what to do?" I would and she wouldn't. Eventually I stopped making suggestions reminding myself that she didn't want a fix, she wanted a friend.
This is Women's History Month and in my research of historical women, I find many women who had to do things on their own. It's the mark of enduring women. They each appreciated a good "go-for" and the loan of tools of wisdom as they worked to create a soaring space called their lives.
I hope you note those in your life carrying around that tool box. Thank them for their wisdom and promise that when the remodeling is finished, they'll be one of the first invited inside!
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 Jane's Words of Encouragement
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Lilac Love
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The big event at the Hulda Klager Lilac Gardens on April 20 is sold out. What a treasure to know people want to come and visit the gardens early, receive refreshments and a book and spend a little time hearing the story behind the story of Where Lilacs Still Bloom. The official opening, April 21, I'm hoping is bright and sunny with lilacs blooming everywhere and there's no limit to the number who can treat themselves to the garden's delight that day or for the next three weeks (through Mother's Day). Everyone is welcome and I hope people will consider taking home a lilac start to plant in their back yards.
My first memory of a lilac is a bush that still stands at the entrance to the driveway of the little one room school. The school stood a quarter mile from our dairy farm in western Wisconsin. The lilacs were the deep purple variety and I remember competing with bees when I pulled a bloom toward my face to inhale the fragrance. I attended the first grade there, the only girl with nine boys. Those lilacs gave me courage!
When my dad took our family to the homestead of his mother, also in western Wisconsin, we tramped back behind the farm where he grew up. Nothing was left of the old homestead - except the lilac bushes. But they inspired his stories. Those flowers were a witness to the past.
The sense of smell it's said is the most evocative and it brings back memories more quickly than images or the written word. On my Facebook page I asked readers to share some of their memory-scents and received wonderful images of "my dad's old spice" or the perfume of a grandmother permeating "a little cloth pouch full of silver dollars I inherited from her." "Joss sticks burning" brought a writer back to her "childhood in Singapore." It's my hope that for those who read Where Lilacs Still Bloom perhaps the memory of a generous, persistent woman named Hulda Klager who taught herself horticulture will come to mind along with whatever other memory scent brings them comfort.
Courage. Witness. Comfort. Those are just a few of the emotions flowers can invoke. For some of us, it's taking pleasure from the moment, being mindful that beauty is a gift appreciated only when we stop and smell the roses...or the lilacs.
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Word Whisperings |
V is for Vengeance by Sue Grafton. (Penguin), 2011.
The publisher's information about this latest Alphabet Series book reads:
"A woman with a murky past who kills herself-or was it murder? A spoiled kid awash in gambling debt who thinks he can beat the system. A lovely woman whose life is about to splinter into a thousand fragments. A professional shoplifting ring working for the Mob, racking up millions from stolen goods. A wandering husband, rich and ruthless. A dirty cop so entrenched on the force he is immune to exposure. A sinister gangster, conscienceless and brutal. A lonely widower mourning the death of his lover, desperate for answers, which may be worse than the pain of his loss. A private detective, Kinsey Millhone, whose thirty-eighth-birthday gift is a punch in the face that leaves her with two black eyes and a busted nose.
And an elegant and powerful businessman whose dealings are definitely outside the law: the magus at the center of the web.
V: Victim. Violence, Vengeance."
Give you chills? It did me. I love a good mystery and Sue Grafton has no need of my endorsement that's she's written one. She's made a literary life out of her New York Times best-selling alphabet series. I think this novel is her best. She intricately weaves characters who we know will become intertwined with each other but have no idea how. I've been thinking about all these characters long after I finished the book. Some made poor choices; several were involved in crimes and still, she made me care about them, understand what might have led them to their fate. I laughed and blinked back tears more than once. Dealing with all these people is Kinsey Millhone, insurance investigator, private detective, the star of the series. She's smart, funny, and so human! It's all set in the 1980s where Grafton stays true to that period, without cell phones. A crime must be solved but Sue Grafton does it in such inventive ways. You'll love this book and if you haven't read any of the series, you can start with V and still enjoy all the others from A to well, V!
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Jane's Schedule
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 WHEN: Saturday, April 14, 2:00 p.m.
WHERE: Cannon Beach Library, 131 Hemlock, Cannon Beach, Oregon
WHAT: NORTHWEST AUTHOR SERIES, sponsored by this unique, privately funded library open to the public, and by the Cannon Beach Book Company. Last year Jane had to cancel this invitation due to Jerry's health issues but she'll be there with bells on talking about all her newest releases including The Daughter's Walk and Where Lilacs Still Bloom.
WHEN: Sunday, April 15 -- 1:00 p.m.
WHERE: Fort Clatsop, Astoria, Oregon
WHAT: Jane will be the guest speaker for In Their Footsteps and will talk about "The Daughter's Walk: A Northwest Story of 1896 and Beyond." Hulda Klager will come up too!
WHEN: Monday, April 16, 1:00 p.m.
WHERE: Shoalwater Bay Tribal Community Library, Shoalwater Indian Reservation, Washington
WHAT: Jane's Change and Cherish Series has a connection to Shoalwater country as Emma Giesy and the male scouts she accompanied spent their first winter not far from this Pacific Coast site. Join Jane as she speaks about the power of our own stories to inspire us and heal our spirits, too. Sponsored by the Shoalwater Tribal Library.
WHEN: Tuesday, April 17, 7:00 p.m.
WHERE: Hood River Hotel, 102 Oak St., Hood River, Oregon
WHAT: It's release day for Jane's latest novel, Where Lilacs Still Bloom, so come get your copy and hear Jane introduce Hulda Klager, a woman who taught herself horticulture and whose generosity and lilacs continue to give beauty to the world. For more information contact Jenny at 541-386-5353 or books@waucomabookstore.com.
WHEN: Wednesday, April 18, 6:30 p.m.
WHERE: Sherman County School Library, Moro, Oregon
WHAT: Jane may have moved away but she still has part of her heart in Sherman County. Join her and many other students and community members as they celebrate national poetry month and reading. Jane will have her new book Where Lilacs Still Bloom available and will also be reading from a surprise novel...maybe her own!
WHEN: Thursday, April 19, 7:00 p.m.
WHERE: Powell's Books at Cedar Hills Crossing, 3415 SW Cedar Hills Blvd., Beaverton, Oregon
WHAT: Come hear Jane talk about her latest novel, Where Lilacs Still Bloom, a story of a strong woman and her lilacs.
WHEN: Friday, April 20, (the day before the annual Lilac Days opening), 10:00 a.m. to noon and 1:00-3:00 p.m. SOLD OUT!
WHEN: April 21, 10 to 4:00 - Jane will be signing books and chatting with visitors all day at the opening of the Hulda Klager Lilac gardens. Tour Hulda's house, smell the flowers, take a lilac start home to grace your garden. And in the meantime, purchase a book - maybe for Mother's Day - and have Jane sign it!
WHEN: Tuesday, April 24, 6:30 p.m.
WHERE: Paulina Springs Book Store, 422 S.W. 6th St., Redmond, Oregon
WHAT: Cynthia, owner of the Redmond Paulina Springs Bookstore, once wrote an endorsement for one of Jane's books so this store holds a special place in Jane's heart. She loves visiting this store just minutes from her new home. There's lots of room, always refreshments, too, so bring a friend as Jane shares stories from her latest novel, Where Lilacs Still Bloom, based on the life of a fascinating Northwest woman who affected hundreds around the country.
WHEN: Wednesday, April 25, 6:30 p.m.
WHERE: Paulina Springs Book Store, 252 W. Hood, Sisters, Oregon
WHAT: Join Jane at one of her favorite book stores as she talks about Where Lilacs Still Bloom, her latest historical novel based on the life of Hulda Klager and her passion for lilacs. Paulina Springs in Sisters hosted Jane's first ever book signing back in 1991 for Homestead. It's always an evening full of surprises so join Bunny, Amanda, Brad and all the Sister's staff as they bring Jane to their store.
For events in May and beyond, Please visit Jane's website and click on News and Events. Thanks!
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Many Thanks to All my Readers | 
"I'll be directing the audio recording for Where Lilacs Still Bloom beginning tomorrow morning in Los Angeles. As usual with your books (this is the third one I've directed), I kept finding myself reading through tears-often lots of them. The straightforward simplicity of your words ALWAYS delivers such a POWERFUL EFFECT! Thank you for putting the purity and wisdom of your love into the world in a way that's healing for people all over the planet. Just like Hulda Klager's flowers!!! Jill Whitesides-Woo, Producer.
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 On March 13, I'm a guest blogger at romconinc.com, a romance-related blog. You can visit the blog, read about my take on "Loving." If you comment, you might win a copy of my latest! Ultimately, I hope my books are about loving: between lovers, parents and children, a couple married for years (who can also be lovers, I might add!), people and their pets. Love is also between people and their passions and in this story, about how a German immigrant woman's love of lilacs touched the lives of thousands. Take time to smell the flowers this month! |
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