Have you seen the amazing museum quality prints in the main hallway?  Please watch over the next week or so for more information on how you can turn your digital photos into similar works of art.

 

Please remember on school out days to pack a lunch for your child. 

Several of you have requested some type of parent directory - a way for parents to connect for birthdays, carpooling, babysitting, and more.

Kerry Malone has volunteered to head up this project for us.  You sill soon see a questionaire in your mail box that gives you an opportunity to opt in or out of the Parent Directory as well as choose what information you would like listed.

 

A convenience enjoyed by nearly half of NQACC parents, automatically charges tuition on your credit card or electronically transfers it from your bank account.  Applications are available in the Parent Center.  If you have questions contact Sandy.

 

 by Mary Ann Abbott,

Parent Consultant                                 North Seattle Community College
                       
 
I recently talked with a father as he carried his three-year-old daughter out of her childcare center.  "I'm picking up early," he said. "It's been a hectic day at work." 
 
I smiled, "So, you are going to have some fun together?"
As Nina grabbed his neck more tightly, her dad said, "Yes.  I hope so...she's in charge."
 
I've been thinking about his words.  What did "she's in charge" mean to him?  I am guessing that this father was open to the child's ideas that afternoon -whatever she wanted to do.   He was work-weary and welcomed some fun and diversion. It could be  wonderful parent/child bonding! But, I am wondering if his unconscious memory reeled back to Nina's younger years. During those years, the parent didn't have much control.  Who was in charge of Nina's eating?  Who gave her permission to sleep?   Who decided to use the potty?  And, who was either pleasant or a grouch?   The answer was simple: "Nina!" Yes, her father was there.  But, he was subservient to Nina's desires;
Nina was in charge, and the father's role became one of an encourager in these activities.
 
The scene is a wedding reception hall.  Wes, age 3, climbs on the window ledges. His mother goes to him, talks to him, and pulls him down.  A few minutes later, Wes is at it again.  More reminders. He scampered to the windows again. Somehow, Wes does not regard his mother's words as authoritative.  Her words and behaviors do not signal firm, polite guidance to him. Who's in charge?  Why, it's Wes!  He's in charge!   Mother is playing catch-up.  That Mother felt outwitted and at the mercy of a small child.
 
Parent Educator Elizabeth  Crary, in her book, Without Spanking or Spoiling:  A Practical Approach to Toddler and Preschool Guidance, says that a child  will judge the parent's actions  based on what he/she (the parent) has done in the past, rather than what is currently said.  This means that the past actions of the parent will influence the child's behaviors.  Most likely, in the past, Wes persisted in his noncompliant behavior, and Mother finally gave up and let him be in charge. So, at the reception hall, Wes persisted with noncompliant behavior again and bet that Mother would give up again.
 
Parents can regularly become victims of this noncompliance challenge.   It happens, in part, because of the child's temperament; but, it's also because parents allow the child to take charge. Granted, a child should have many positive opportunities to be in charge, but, when it comes to safety guidelines and important rules, the parent should not ignore infractions. If the guideline is to pick up toys before bedtime, then the child should do it and not lure the parent into doing it, by default.   If the parent picks up the toys for him, the child will depend on the parent's doing it again-and again.   The child is in charge.
 
If a child's bedtime tantrum postpones or changes the set bedtime, the parent inadvertently teaches the child that loud, nasty, and uncooperative behavior is effective at changing a parent's mind. The child is in charge.
 
As the child gets older and a little wiser, the desire to be in charge is still there.  But the parents have experience in the world.   They teach; they set the rules. They know what is safe and what it not.  They set the vision for how the family is run. Because the world is very big and the issues are very complicated, it's very dangerous for a young child to be "in charge."
 
Every parent has a vulnerable area, which, when pushed by the child, can cave in. 
Sometimes, it is helpful to make a list of areas where the child can definitely be in charge -perhaps some food choices, toy and activity selections, clothes choices, etc.  Then, there should also be a non-negotiable list where the parent is in charge.  Some parents find it helpful to make a third list, a combined list with some parent guidelines, along with some child wishes.
 
Crary offers some additional suggestions for effective follow- through: 
(1)   "Think before you speak."  (That's a good guideline for anyone!)
(2)   "Assist your child with compliance."  (Take action!)
(3)   "Use fewer words."  (Young children get lost in too many words.  Make sure
your requests are clear.)

By Jan Pendergrass, Pastor for Children and Families at First Free Methodist
 
Spiritual Maintenance, Part 2
 
Last month we talked about how our spiritual development takes regular maintenance, much like our vehicles. We considered a plan for spiritual development as described in 2 Peter 1:5-7. Peter's progression of faith helps us understand what it means to grow into the loving people God intends us to be. He says,
 
... add to your faith, virtue; and to virtue, knowledge; and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; and to godliness, brotherly kindness; and to brotherly kindness, love. 2 Peter 1:5-7
 
We looked at each element of this growth process and considered what might take place at each step. This month let's ask ourselves as parents how we are doing in helping our children in each area. Here are some specific questions we can ask ourselves as we evaluate our family's Spiritual Maintenance Plan:
 
 
Regardless of our own age or the age of our kids, I believe these are good questions to ask ourselves as we seek to be better parents and people. Like the maintenance of our vehicles, sometimes we need to a little realigning, balance checking, and perhaps some refueling! We invite you to join us at First Free Methodist as we partner with you to help your kids and you fuel up and tune up for optimum spiritual development! You can find out more about our programs and worship services at www.ffmc.org. 

By Brenda Massey - R5 Parent and Carnival Committee Member
 
While planning for our June 19 school carnival is under way, remember that we'll always need help.  Thanks goes to the committee leaders who volunteered to lead the various groups that will pull this together.  They're going to need some help over the next few months, but none of the responsibilities are too large when we work together.
 
We have a good list of Road Crew volunteers who have offered to be of assistance where needed, but in an interesting twist, this year, we've drafted each of our classrooms into service.   That's right: you're in the circus now.  We're asking parents to help out with the event based on their child's classroom.  We don't expect to take too much of anyone's time, but do want to remind everyone that part of our agreement as parents is that we volunteer 10 hours per year to the center.  Helping out with this year's circus is a fun way to satisfy those hours!
 
See the list below for our leaders, their responsibilities, and their classrooms, where applicable.  Some leaders won't need classroom support, but feel free to offer your help to any of these people by emailing brenda.massey@sea.ddb.com, or calling me at 206.906.9563 H or 469.693.6056 M.
 
Ring Leaders

Royale and Shari

     Kelly Fulks t1 and t2 parents

Myla Causing

Tight Rope - (Auction Coordinator) 

Brenda Massey R4 and R5 parents

Clown - (Game Coordinator) 

Karyn Armstrong R6 parents

Acrobat - (Marketing)

Karen Moore, Melissa Park all classroom parents

Train Enginer - (Facilities)

Dana Munn R3 parents

So, what are we going to do with you once we've got you?  We're going to make the best school carnival we can so we can raise the most possible.  This year, our goal is to raise $7500 and plan to use the funds for improvements to the school or individual classrooms.  Look for a survey soon, which will give you a chance to weigh in.
Know your target audience. Who are your most important customers, clients or prospects, and why? Know what is important to them and address their needs in your newsletter each month. Include a photo to make your newsletter even more appealing.

The pictures that she has chosed to share in the Teacher Gallery are evidence of her more calmed and relexed side.  She says that she likes them best and uses them to decorate her own home.  She said that when you are busy working with children all day, it is nice to have a quiet and relaxing place to come home to. 

 

She hopes you enjoy her work this month!