Change Management Consulting News 
Advice for Transforming your OrganizationApril 2011
In This Issue
Tips for Managing Conflict
News Brief
Inspirational Quotes

Stanley Cherkasky
Stanley Cherkasky
Managing Partner 
 
 
Change Management Consulting, Inc. (CMC) is a global management consulting and training company dedicated to helping organizations of all sizes improve performance, achieve goals and advance leadership capability.
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Organizational Development


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Welcome to our monthly newsletter. It delivers valuable news, best practices, and resources to enhance your organization's competitive position. Since our focus is on achieving business results, we truly become a business partner to our clients. This is accomplished through a combination of assessments, customized training, and management consulting.

Tips for Managing Conflict 


Wherever people gather and interact there will be differences of opinion, miscommunication, disputes, and heated arguments. It's a normal part of human functioning. And especially around the holidays, stress and tension can run very high, making us more prone to confrontations and clashes. While some of us shy away from conflict (a timid response), others fight their way through it (an aggressive response).


When we perceive a significant threat to us, our bodies get ready either for a fight or a desperate flight from defeat. For example, if you are faced with a sharp-toothed beast, you have two choices: wrestle it or run like heck.

 

During an encounter with conflict, we often experience physical symptoms: hair stands on end, heart rate increases, palms become sweaty, face turns red, pupils dilate, sweat glands open. Our anxious emotional state causes us to lose our natural judgment. Thinking becomes a hindrance. Just as when faced with the sharp-toothed beast, our brain tells us that hesitation could very well equal death.


Conflict does not have to result in fight or flight. And it doesn't have to be viewed negatively. In fact, people who possess conflict handling skills are able to view conflict as a positive opportunity to resolve issues rather than letting them fester into bigger problems.


Here are quick tips for managing conflict:


1. Avoid being defensive. Avoid attacking or playing the victim. Control your emotions from the beginning of the confrontation.


2. Use open and honest communication. Seek to understand the other person first. Talk about the facts and use specific language to clarify the issue.


3. Listen with empathy. Listen to the other person's feelings and paraphrase those feelings to show that you understand their position. Say, "I understand your frustration with ..."


4. Use questions to clarify. When it's not clear what the other person wants, ask open-ended questions to better understand the real problems and concerns. Say, "Tell me more about that."


5. Avoid using always and never. Use specific and factual language to put the problem on the table. In general, "always" and "never" are inflammatory words that distort and exaggerate an issue.


6. Stick to the current issue. Bringing up annoyances from the past diverts from the conflict, confuses the issue, and prevents finding a solution for the existing problem.

7. Stay flexible. Consider alternative solutions. Say, "You want ABC and I want XYZ. How can we do both?" Developing multiple right answers increases your chances of finding a win-win outcome.


8. Use humor. Humor defuses tension and can help bring about an amicable resolution.

 

CMC offers a free consultation for those interested in learning more about Leadership Development and how it can benefit your organization.

News Briefs

High Anxiety Resulting in More Communication  
  
According to a 2008 survey by Watson Wyatt, researchers found that employers are increasing communication with employees in order to relieve workers' stress and anxiety and improve engagement during these challenging times. (Source: HR Magazine, February 2009)
Inspirational Quotes

Business

"Sandwich every bit of criticism between two thick layers of praise." - Mary Kay Ash
  
Change

"We are not animals. We are not a product of what has happened to us in our past. We have the power of choice. - Stephen Covey
 
Leadership

"Executives owe it to the organization and to their fellow workers not to tolerate nonperforming individuals in important jobs." - Peter Drucker
 
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