God will provide! An old timer sits on his porch while the rains continue and the river rises. A city official in a jeep stops and offers the guy in the rocking chair a ride to safety. Reply: "not to worry, God will provide". The water is now up to the level of the porch and the police arrive in a row boat and tell the old timer he had better go with them or he will be in serious trouble. Reply: "not to worry, God will provide." Finally the sheriff comes by in a powered rescue boat while the water has reached the seat of the rocking chair. The Sherif says this is the last chance for the old timer to get to safety, as there is nobody left in town to save him. Same response: "not to worry, God will provide."
The inevitable happens, and the old timer is furious when he gets to the pearly gates. He demands an explanation from St Peter as to why God had abandoned him in his moment of greatest need. St. Peter's reply - "We sent 3 people to help you out, what more could we have done?"
Moral of the story: "Yes, God will provide. But you had better be open to how!" I don't know, but all of this seemed to make sense to Rich Shearer.
GUESTS, VISITING ROTARIANS, AND SUCH
Chris Price - here for the fourth time
Linda McCowan - the main reason we let Skip hang around
Larry Sly - Concord, Contra Costa County Food Bank
Ulrich Luscher Joanne's hubby
Blair Howard - more on here later
Marcia and Brad Howard - Blair's proud parents
Chloe Johnson - daughter of Gillett
Glenda Fillinger - ex-Pres Paul's much better half
Mark von Hoetzendorff - San Ramon Club and guest speaker
BIRTHDAYS
Gillett topped everything with his announcement of family birthdays. If you can believe this, during the past week his sister celebrated her 50th birthday, his mother her 75th, and his grandmother her 100th. Fines totalled the sum of all of their years. Prez Pat should have that amount figured out shortly.
HELPING WHERE AND WHEN IT'S NEEDED
Blair Howard was lauded by Nancy Polis for the extraordinary job she did as leader of the Opportunity Knocks gift drive for 28 families "adopted" by the Stanley Middle School. Over 100 bags of gifts were collected. Our club sponsored 2 of these families. Cudo's were also expressed to Mike Edwards, packer extraordinaire, transportation providers Venera Maysuryants, Krysten Laine and Chuck Kenney, and collections supervisor Debbie Cooper.
Blair thanked the club for our strong support. She revealed a plan to expand this worthwhile endeavor to elementary schools next year. Prez Pat presented her with a Rotary service pin and a certificate for a prosthetic hand to be presented to a deserving person in her name. Congratulations Blair!
A TEASER FOR THE UPCOMING CHRISTMAS PARTY SPECIAL EDITION
Mike Edwards was chosen the most accomplished kazoo player
at the Christmas party this year. Forunately were subjected to encore of only one chorus of jingle bells. Stayed tuned for a special Lamorindan edition focusing soley on the Christmas party.
MYSTERY ROTARIAN
This week's mystery rotarian probably has the record for most obscure, least helpful clues yet. Not even a head Dr. could have figured this one out.
1. Once had poison oak so badly one eye was swollen shut.
2. Had a nose bleed in the middle of a job interview.
2. Can wiggle ears, one at a time or both at the same time.
In the final analysis, it could only be Rich Shearer, who has always specialized in the theatre of the absurd. He was pleased to demonstrate his ear wiggling prowess. Despite the clamor for blood by the assembled rabble, Rich either wouldn't, or couldn't, show us a bonafide nose bleed. Thank goodness for small favors!
PROGRAM: