Do you remember on your weekend when you were told that you are the light of the world? Then they told you to go out and share what you had found during the Weekend. We can't speak for others, but we definitely had butterflies in our stomach after hearing that. Us? Talk about such an intimate experience to our family and friends? That was scary. What if they not only rejected the offer, but also rejected us as some kind of weird people? Then we remembered....dear friends of ours had taken the risk to offer us this beautiful gift of a marriage reborn. How could we not offer that same gift to others?
When you think about it, every invitation carries a risk with it. When you plan a party and send out the invitations, you risk that nobody will come. We invite people into our lives in various ways every day. The difference between a positive acceptance of the invitation or a rejection is in the trust that you build with that individual or couple and your approach.
Before you invite there are always plans and preparations that need to be completed. Within WWME, the first preparation should be prayer. Pray that the couple's hearts may be opened to the message you are bringing to them. As a matter of fact, a prayer first thing in the morning for all couples you may meet that day is a great way to prepare yourself for the risks you may be called to take. Pray that your attitude will be friendly and accepting even if the invitation is rejected. Pray that your motives will be pure in that you are offering the invitation for the good of the couple involved, not because of some personal need for validation.
The next part of preparation is to decide the when and where of issuing the invitation. Be creative. Do not procrastinate if you feel God's call to invite a couple! You might invite one or more couples over for dinner to explain WWME to them and issue the invitation. You might hold an inviting dance/picnic with your community and invite non-encountered couple to experience the friendliness and closeness of the WWME community. Some communities organize pulpit talks in their local Churches where they share their experiences and offer the invitation to attend the weekend. Ever since our WWME Weekend we have received Communion side-by-side just as we did on our wedding day. That has initiated several conversations about our WWME experience. The most effective way to offer an invitation is face-to-face. Talk to people about your WWME experience.
As you are speaking, the other person is probably thinking, "Yeah. But what's in it for me?" Think of all the ways that WWME has improved your relationships: more love, better communication, enriched time together with your spouse, better lovemaking, new friends, a support group, personal growth, etc. All of which equals a healthier marriage. Be sure you answer that "unasked" question. Be aware that men often feel the most threatened by the prospect of improving" their marriage. It may help to relate it to the seminars they may be required to take at work to upgrade their employment skills.
When you are ready to offer an invitation, be friendly and open. Any "pressure" you place upon a couple will likely result in a negative response. Aim to make them feel comfortable and loved. Reassure them that you are offering them the gift of WWME because you see the love in their marriage. Be gently persistent. It may take more than one invitation to a Weekend before they are ready to commit to going.
Sometimes it isn't possible to invite someone face-to-face due to distance or other circumstances. Try writing the couple a personal love letter highlighting their most endearing traits and how you think they would benefit from a special weekend spent getting to know each other more deeply; include a WWME pamphlet. If possible, follow up with a phone call reassuring them of your love and caring and giving them the opportunity to ask questions.
Of course, the least personal method, often works, too. Leave pamphlets about WWME in your doctor's or dentist's office, laying on the table in the coffee room at work, in a pamphlet rack at school, anywhere people have to wait. Having looked at the pamphlet may open their hearts to an invitation in the future. It may even motivate them to actively seek out a WWME Weekend!
You may have read/heard many of the concepts above before, but there is one more aspect of inviting that we often miss in WWME: Inviting within the community. Have you invited the new couples off of the WWME Weekend to join us in our ministry? Have you asked a couple to take tickets at the dance? Or to write an article for your newsletter? Or to attend a special enrichment? Or to come over for dinner one night? Have you judged them to be unworthy or too immature or too unloving?
The harvest is heavy and the laborers are few. Look at your community with fresh eyes. Who have you overlooked as leadership potential? Are there some couples that with a little encouragement might have a gift of leadership to offer? Can you create a position to take advantage of their gifts and ease them into one of the pillars? Do you have a couple in your community that focuses on inviting? Have you selfishly insisted on "doing it all myself" instead of delegating some of the work so that other couples can contribute to the mission of WWME.
The word "invite" sounds like an easy, friendly activity, but it actually involves a complex set of variables that can cause us to procrastinate, avoid, and down-right refuse to participate. God calls us to courage. Courage to face our fears. Courage to invite. Courage to be a light unto the world. Take a risk today! Invite!
10/10 Questions:
1. Who am I afraid to invite to a WWME Weekend? Why? How do I feel about my answer?
2. The last time we invited a couple to attend a WWME Weekend was __________? How do I feel about my answer?
3. How has WWME affected our marriage? How do I feel about my answer?
4. Which couple in our community would I like to invite to become more involved with us? How do I feel about my answer?
5. What prevents me from telling more people about my WWME experiences? How do I feel about my answer?
6. How can I become more effective at inviting people to attend a WWME Weekend? What are my feelings about this?
7. "God wants me to become a light unto the world." How do I feel about this statement?
Patricia and Doriano Baisi
Canadian eMatrimony Editors
