The Rev. Sharon L. Vandegrift, M.Div, PCC
Professional Certified Coach, International Coach Federation
Endorsed Life Coach, United Methodist Church
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Quotes Of the Month | |
"When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives means the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a warm and tender hand."
~Henri Nouwen
"Nothing but heaven itself is better than a friend who is really a friend."
~Plautus
"Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down."
~Oprah Winfrey |
| Prayer for the Month | |
"God, we have filled our lives with so many things there is scarcely room left for each other and for you. "There's not time!" we protest. "I know you're busy," we assume.
Slow us down , God: forgive our busy-ness which destroys our openness, our preoccupaton which leaves us unaware of the gentle breeze of your Spirit, our self-absorption which makes us ignore the cries of our brothers and sisters. And, if we have not yet been possessed by your word of grace and acceptance, we pray that our ears may be opened to hear it now."
~from Touch Holiness
by Ruth C. Duck |
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Church Staff Coaching
1 or 2 Day Retreat | |
Be intentional about preparing your staff for a great start to the 2011/12 program year!
Bridge-the-Gap offers a 1 or 2 day Church Staff Coaching Retreat that cna be custom tailored to the personality and needs of your professional staff.
Scheduling now for fall 2011.
Contact Sharon today to design a coaching package that is right for your staff.
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Greetings!
Studies on personal resiliency suggest that one of the most helpful things to have in place in the midst of challenges and transition is a strong support network of people who love and care for us. But, since creating, nurturing and sustaining these support networks takes time, energy and intention, it is sometimes neglected in our lives. This month I will address the seemingly simple, but profoundly important skill of 'making friends.'
Enjoy ~ Sharon
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Making and Keeping Friends | |
We were supposed to learn it as children, and it is embarrassing to even ponder the idea that we are no longer sure how to do it. But, for many adults it is a real challenge: making friends.
At a certain point in our lives we simply expect to have 'close friends'. All good people have friends...right? Well, actually, apart from our 'Christmas card list friends'; and those 'old friends' who we rarely see but can call on in a time of need; and, for some, spouses who are good friends; many of us do not have close friends in our day to day lives. And, the vast majority of clergy report that they do not have any friends outside of the churches they are serving. (That means no friends for whom they are not also 'pastor'). In the midst of the intensity of our lives, many of us simply stopped making friends at some point in adulthood. Making friends takes time and energy and effort. Friendships are not just built into our everyday lives, we have to make room for them and nurture them. Though we may still have a cadre of relationships from our past, we may not have friendships that support the present season of our lives.
Most of us have lots of people in our lives. But, we know the truth in our depths of our souls: having lots of people in our lives does not constitute a circle of friends.
But we may be somewhat befuddled about how we can begin to make new friends. How do we connect on a deeper level with one or more of the many people in our lives? Though becoming friends is ultimately a kind of organic process that takes root and grows more deeply and flourishes over time, we can make the choice to begin that process.
The first step is to acknowledge the void in our lives and to decide that making friends is something we really want to do. Then we are ready to be open to the possibilities. We begin by identifying someone or a group of people who we would simply like to get to know better. Then, we find the time and create the space in our schedules and make plans to get together. If we continue to open up time and pay attention to making friends as a priority, relationships will grow.
· Are you ready to set aside time and energy in your life for building friendships?
· Is there someone or a group of people in your life who you would like to 'make friends' with?
· How might you begin the journey of making friends this week?
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| Query for the Coach | |
Dear Sharon,
My church has spent most of the past year in a strategic planning process. We spent money on a consultant and spent hours collecting information, sharing ideas and figuring out a plan that makes sense for our church. We tried to involve the whole congregation. There were quite a few meetings where people were in disagreement. But finally, last month, the Planning Team presented the plan for approval at a pot-luck supper. It was well attended and people seemed excited to hear about the results and to know that we have a plan for the future. But now that we have completed the strategic plan, I am having trouble getting people motivated to make sure it gets implemented. I know that they are feeling tired after all of the time and energy that we spent on the process, and I want them to feel like they accomplished something important. But, I am afraid if I just let it go for a while, nothing will come of all of our work. It is a big, comprehensive plan for change, and I am not sure what to do next. I am worried that the plan will eventually end up on a shelf covered in dust!
Send your Query to Sharon (your name and other identifying information will be kept confidential) To read Sharon's reponse go to: Query for the Coach |
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Bridge-the-Gap Life Coaching Services, LLC
~ Empowering Clergywomen to Excel |
The Rev. Sharon L. Vandegrift, M.Div., PCC 
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