This is a true story.The name and profession are not mentioned to protect the not-so-innocent.

I was at an informal networking training, and the facilitator (who is relatively well-known in the area as a pretty good networker) used me as a guinea pig to make his point. He asked me the following questions:

What would I have to do to gain your trust so that you could refer me to your best client?

I gave that some thought and decided that I first needed to meet with him to learn his goals, what kinds of clients he works with and really what kind of person he is. Then I said I would want to meet with a satisfied client to hear about how he does business. I also wanted to know how he liked to be referred. Nothing particularly unusual in my answer. These are some of the basic things you do to build trust in networking.

If I did those things, would you be able to refer me to your best client?

I said yes, I thought I could.

Do you have a specific client in mind?

Yes, I did.

Who is this person?

I gave him the basics about the client. He was just the sort of person the facilitator would want to meet.

Side note. This is an excellent exercise with a good series of questions to run through when you have built the beginnings of a relationship with a potential referral source.

But back to the story. I said, "Sounds like we just committed to meeting and strategizing how to accomplish what we just talked about." He agreed. After the meeting, I went home and emailed him to propose a meeting.

And he never emailed me back. Guess he wasn't that interested in meeting my client.

The moral of this story? Always follow up! Especially if someone has indicated a willingness to help you. I know it sounds obvious. But it isn't, or this person would have arranged to meet with me.

His lack of follow through sent me several possible messages.

1. I was not important enough to meet with, even though I gave him every indication that I had a valuable contact for him.

2. His follow through is so bad that he treats everyone that way. Definitely not a quality I want to see in someone I potentially would refer to.

3. He's not really interested in growing his business.

Obviously, I don't know which one it is. Or it could be a combination of any/all of them. What I do know is that I am not currently willing to refer him. He now has a very tough job if he wants to change my mind. And he has ruined his reputation in my mind as a good networker. Good networkers always follow up.

So are you a good networker or a poor networker? Prove it to your network by your actions!

Oh yeah, and if anyone wants to meet my client, you know what you have to do.