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| Barefoot, Pregnant and in the Kitchen
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Nabi and I are back after a 20 hour flight from Dubai. This newsletter was written last Thursday, after the meeting described in the previous newsletter. Our hotel lost access to the internet, so it couldn't be sent until now. Something is brewing in Farza that will be announced soon. I'll give you the full Farza report after it is announced.
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The meeting with the Farza governor, leader of the shura, and their entourage, including a young man carrying an AK-47, was a complete success. The take out rice, lamb kabob, and nan we served for lunch restored our reputation as hosts.
There was only one incident. An irate neighbor threw two rocks through our hallway window, just as the meeting began. Maiwand went to investigate. We could hear Maiwand and the neighbor yelling at each other. I closed the door. The man with the AK-47 laid his gun over his lap, pointed at the door, and the meeting went on.
The neighbor accused someone of looking (staring) into his backyard from inside our house. His wife or daughter(s) must have been in the backyard. We don't know who the transgressor was. We also don't know if someone looked out the window in passing or stared. The neighbor considered whatever happened to be an invasion of privacy. In any event, we now have two broken windows, an angry neighbor and a case for Judge Judy.
Popsicles at 10 cents a pop. We wanted to buy popsicles for the children until he ran out. |
It didn't take long before the vendor was overwhelmed by the children and he had to stop. | This father came to the rescue and restored order. But, even he couldn't hold them back long. No one was angry. Everyone just realized it was an impossible task. So, we drove on.
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The governor explained the process that should be followed to obtain the requisite approvals to build the school in Farza. For starters we will need to consult with the governor, malik, villagers, shura, ministry of education and ministry of economy. We've had enough experience with approval processes to know how long and involved they can become. We don't bribe officials. Therefore, the processing time can be longer for us than others.
I explained to them that we will certainly be involved in the process, when needed, but everyone should understand that this is their project not TIE's. We're not in Farza to build a school for girls. TIE is providing financial support the construction of a school they will build. The partnership approach to providing aid has worked well for us over the years. They appreciate being in control and it shifts most of the responsibility onto them.
During the meeting, we learned that the district has 14 schools for boys and 5 for girls. The imbalance between boys and girl's schools is not just a problem in the allocation of resources. It's a reflection of the culture. Even where there is no threat from the Taliban, boys attending school far outnumber the girls.
Why the imbalance? In part, because there is a considerable segment of Afghan society, men and women, who question the need for a woman to be educated. For them, a woman should marry, have children, and stay home. Many Afghan families, who are now allowing their daughters to attend school, will "marry them off", often against their will, before they complete their education.
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This "cultural difference" is best summarized with a phrase I first heard spoken during my battle cry days on the Berkeley campus; " A woman should be barefoot, pregnant and in the kitchen." The average Afghan family has 8 children. A woman with the responsibility of maintaining a household with eight children wouldn't have time to read?
The debate is on in Afghanistan over a woman's role in society. On occasion, I'm able to enter that debate. The question some of you may ask be asking is, on what side? On that subject I am only willing to reveal that I was 100% supportive of the "Ban the Bra" campaign. Women gave up on that one much too quickly. A couple of bonfires a few smores and it was over.
The struggle for women's rights in Afghanistan is serious. It directly impacts the choices young Afghan girls and women will have. I make light of conditions, as an escape, and spare you the horrific stories. There's enough depressing news, without me joining in.
Time out for IN - N - Out -- (Best ever burgers and fries for those of you living outside California)
Budd
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To view more photos go to
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