| Calendar of Events
November 13
1:00-3:30 PM
The Mayan Long Count Calendar Workshop
January 23
9:00 AM - 12:15 PM
Harmony in Relationships: Nonviolent Communications Workshop: CEU Workshop
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Host Your Event at Clarus Center
Located in Cantera Office Park, Clarus Center offers meeting space for up to 45 persons. Enjoy views through floor-to-ceiling windows of the surrounding wetlands and trees.
Visit http://worktopia.com/
for pricing and availability of our meeting Space
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Monday 9:00 - 10:00 am Advanced/ongoing
Tuesday 10:00 - 11:00 am Intermediate/ongoing
Wednesday 6:00 - 7:00 pm Basic/ongoing
New! Thursday 1:00 - 2:00pm Basic/sign with a friend and get 2 mat classes free!
call (630) 841-4237
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DIALECTICAL BEHAVIOR THERAPY GROUP
Tuesday evenings, 6:00 - 7:30 at Clarus Center
Participants learn skills to:
* Regulate Emotions
* Increase nterpersonal Effectiveness
* Cope with and Tolerate Distress
* Enhance Mindfulness
For more information, please contact Janet Levitt, 630-393-9800 ext. 206
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Private yoga sessions for Integral Health
Practice Customized for
Your Mind, Body and Spirit
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Groups by Marty Martin
Balanced Entrepreneur Success Circles
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Dear Friends of Clarus,
I would like to take this time to introduce myself to all of you as the new editor of the Clarus Center Newsletter. I am a postdoctoral fellow and licensed professional counselor who is very happy to have recently joined the Clarus Center Community. During this month of thanksgiving, I would like to thank Stacey Hurst for all of her hard work and dedication to this newsletter. I look forward to carrying on the tradition of bringing this newsletter together each month so that all of you may enjoy its offerings.
We are excited to offer you this month's newsletter! We have chosen the theme of thankfulness to guide us through this season and remind us of our many blessings. I encourage you to take a moment to check out the insightful article on being grateful, the tips for helping your child who is being teased, and helpful tools for creating a gratitude practice of your own! There's also a delicious seasonal treat and upcoming events you should not miss!
Feel free to forward this email along to anyone you think might enjoy.
Happy Thanksgiving!
Maria Urani Liu, Psy.D., LPC, Newsletter Editor x 225 |
STRESS REDUCTION THROUGH GRATITUDEBy: Denise Dojka, Psy.D.November is the start of the holiday season. I don't know about you, but for me, that includes three family birthdays, parent-teacher conferences, cooking Thanksgiving dinner, trying to come up with a witty letter to include in the holiday cards, getting those cards out before Christmas, shopping for gifts, getting the kids to pageant practices, buying presents for teachers and bus drivers, baking cookies for class parties, etc. In addition to the routine activities of work and family life.
Does thinking about your own upcoming holiday tasks send your stress level soaring? How would you like to learn a simple way to cope with stress, enhance your health, and increase your overall feeling of life satisfaction?
You can do all this by developing a gratitude practice. What exactly is gratitude? Dictionary.com defines being grateful as "warmly or deeply appreciative of kindness or benefits received." Practicing gratitude is a way to take stock of what you have, and let yourself be open to a connection with God, Spirit, or Universe. Psychologists Robert Emmons and Michael McCullough, authors of The Psychology of Gratitude, found that subjects who wrote weekly in a gratitude journal were different from those who did not have a gratitude practice in the following ways:
· They exercised more regularly.
· They had fewer physical symptoms.
· They felt a greater sense of optimism.
· They felt better about their lives as a whole.
· They were more likely to make progress toward
important personal goals.
People with higher levels of measured gratefulness have higher levels of positive emotions, life satisfaction, zest, optimism, and lower levels of depression and stress. It also appears to enhance their immune systems.
How can you start a gratitude practice? It need not be greatly time consuming, but should be something you can dedicate time to regularly. Choose a time that works best for you, when you can have a few quiet moments for reflection. And keep in mind that Emmons & McCullough found positive results with subjects who only wrote in their gratitude journals weekly! Here are some ideas to help you get started:
· Make a list of things you have to be grateful for.
Add to it whenever something new occurs to you.
Look at it regularly.
· Try reframing your negative thoughts into things to
be grateful for. For example, instead of focusing on
how irritated you are with your three year old's
constant "Why." questions, be grateful s/he can talk
now (and that this is just a phase).
· Joan Borysenko recommends finding one thing to be
grateful for each day, and writing it down. Don't
repeat yourself! This takes care of the really easy
things in about the first month! At the end of one
year, you have a beautiful book of thoughts to look
back on.
· If you have children, you might want to include them
in a practice. You might have everyone go around
the table at Thanksgiving dinner and say what they
are thankful for, or perhaps do this at bedtime.
· In the morning upon awakening, you might say a
prayer of gratitude for a new day and set an intention
for the day.
Here's hoping you try some of these ideas, or develop your own gratitude practice. The benefits you will receive from such a small investment of time and energy are well worth it. If you would like to share your own gratitude practice ideas, please e-mail me at drdojka@comcast.net. I'd be grateful for any thoughts you'd care to share!
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Meditation Muse: Count Your Many Blessings
By: Nancy S.B. Ging, LCSW
I have this 96-year-old mother. She has dementia. Somehow she is still teaching me. A few months ago we were sitting on swinging chairs outside of her "retirement resort." We spoke of the beauty of the flowers and the sunshine. She said something I had never heard her say before, at least not in these particular words. From deep in the recesses of her memory bank she pulled a coin, this little ditty: "Count your blessings; count them one by one. Count your many blessings; see what God has done."
So sweet a memory she gave me that day. Now, this is the same mother who for decades created great confusion in my psyche, propelling me into my career as a psychotherapist. She's often been a challenge for me. But my mother taught me to count blessings and reminded me with that little rhyme which she must have learned in her childhood. Count them one by one. Every good-enough mother probably tells her children this. It is basic. But we need to be reminded over and over again, so easy it is to have doubt and fear take us over in these times of global insecurity.
We need courage in these changing times. The vibration of gratitude transforms the energy of doubt and fear. We need a hefty dose of gratitude on a daily basis, not only at Thanksgiving. A German political thinker, Rudolph Bahro wrote, "When an old culture is dying, the new culture is created by those people who are not afraid to be insecure." Wise words. As we endeavor to co-create a world with more PJS ( that's short for peace, justice and sustainability) we need to manage our insecurity by moving into the arena of the heart where gratitude can be found and poured forth. There within the heart our cup overfloweth even if our retirement funds shriveleth.
American Buddhist teacher, Pema Chodron wrote in Practicing Peace, "If we want there to be peace in the world, we have to be brave enough to soften what is rigid in our hearts, to find the soft spot and stay with it. We have to have that kind of courage and take that kind of responsibility. That is the true practice of Peace."
In this season of Thanksgiving, find that peace. Be that peace. Find the gratitude journal you started a few years ago but may have forgotten about. Pull it out and write down a few blessings, some things which occurred this day for which you feel grateful, before you drift off to sleep in a vibration of deep appreciation. "Count them one by one", those blessings. Write down 4 or 5 per day. In doing so you will enhance and sustain your health, you will engender peace within your being and you will be more likely to act with justice, creating harmony in your world when you awaken.
Nancy Ging, LCSW, www.nancyging.com , is a holistic psychotherapist in practice in Hinsdale since 1981 and at Clarus Center since 2006. She is a teacher, consultant, columnist, author, poet, mother and grandmother.
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 How to Help Your Child Resist Being Targeted for Teasing
By: Lucia LiCavoli, Ph.D.
This article is based on the work of Dr. Kim John Payne, who has 25 years of clinical experience working to prevent teasing and bullying.
To help a child who is being targeted for teasing, teach the child to resist over-reacting which is counter-productive. It's that BIG response that gets them teased, it has nothing to do with fact. For example, all short children are not called "shortie." It's just the child who gets upset when it happens.
So pull aside your child and share the "secret" of how to get so-and-so to stop teasing them. You can ham this up, it is a secret and we all know how delicious it is to know a secret. First ask your child what they are doing when they are being teased. The child will say something like I try to be nicer, I hit, I yell, I tell, etc. Respond by congratulating the child for trying some solution, but observe with the child that it isn't working. Then share the secret: the real reason so-in-so is teasing you is that you are getting upset. The more upset you get the more fun so-in-so is having. The teasing is often shocking to the nature of the child, so spend time listening and reassure the child that the teasing is not about any truth, it is about the fact that they are getting upset. You may need to ask questions to help the child see this, such as, "Are all the short children teased?" Then you help the child find their own age appropriate words (not yours!) to respond in a nonchalant manner to the teasing. For example, for a child who is lightly poked or called a name, the child may simply respond with a "Whatever" (you have to imagine the perfectly sarcastic tone of a middle school aged child here) or "Oh, that's a good one." They must respond, do not tell them to ignore it. For an accusation such as, "I hear you still wet your bed!" Response: "Oh, do you believe that?" Many children will back down with that kind of simple confrontation, but if they do not: "well, you can believe what you like." Simple and elegant! This sort of response says, I have no need to discuss this matter with you, it is my business and you are now dismissed! It is important for the child to keep it simple, almost like a mantra they can use for many situations. And it is very important that their tone be very unimpressed and not at all upset or arrogant, more neutral and dismissive. Practice it, and have fun with it, as if you were rehearsing for a play. And delight with your child about how frustrating it will be for the child who is bullying, when they get no response. Let the child know that they will know they are really getting under the other child's skin when the teasing gets worse. This will go on briefly, and if your child can come to you and giggle over this, all the better. The teasing will stop in 7 - 10 days. And it actually often does by day 4. They must do this 100% of the time; the child needs to commit to not reacting. This method ought to work with 95% of children who are bullying, but there is that 5%. If a child is being physically injured (e.g., choked, bruised), then adults should intervene in a lawful manner. But one BIG word of caution: do not push or encourage a child under 9 to express feelings about all of this. Young children do not need us to awaken them to their feelings, those are for adolescence. Ages 9 - 12 is a transition time with regard to feeling expression, so proceed with care and presence.
Dr. LiCavoli is the founder and co-owner of the Clarus Center and can be reached at (630) 393-9800, ext. 204
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| RECIPE CORNER
Chocolate Pumpkin Bread
by: Rosetta Sodora, RD, LDN
The season of Autumn is a wonderful time of year to enjoy delicious goodies made with pumpkin.
The following is a tasty treat featuring pumpkin which is naturally rich in the antioxidant beta-carotene, along with providing the benefits of potassium, zinc and fiber:
Chocolate Pumpkin Bread
2 cups all-purpose flour
2 teaspoons baking powder
1/4 teaspoon baking soda
1/4 teaspoon salt
1 cup packed brown sugar
1/3 cup margarine or butter - (soft at room temperature)
2 eggs
1/4 cup milk
1 cup canned pumpkin
1/2 cup semi-sweet mini chocolate chips
In a mixing bowl stir together flour, baking powder, baking soda, and salt; set aside. In a large mixer bowl beat together brown sugar and the margarine or butter until well combined. Beat in eggs, add milk and pumpkin, mix well. Add flour mixture to the pumpkin-sugar mixture. Fold in mini chocolate chips.
Pour batter into a greased 9x5x3- inch loaf pan. Bake in a 350 degree oven for 50 to 55 minutes or until wooden pick inserted near the center comes out clean. Cool in pan 10 minutes. You can serve it warm ( may crumble a little) or remove from pan and cool thoroughly on a wire rack before serving. You can also wrap and store the completely cooled loaf in the refrigerator overnight for easy slicing. Makes 1 loaf.
My family enjoys having their chocolate pumpkin bread with a tall glass of soy milk. I am sure that your family members can come up with their favorite choice of beverage to enjoy this tasty bread!!!
Rosetta Sodora is a new addition to our Clarus Center community. She is a dietician with over 25 years of experience with eating disorders and medical issues. She can be reached at (630) 393-9800, ext. 230.
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The Mayan Long Count Calendar Workshop
November 13, 2008
1:00-3:30 PM
COST: $40 in advance-register at Yoga Now
$45 at the door
The Mayans were master time-keepers, fascinated by enormous amounts of time. Modern interpretations of the Long Count calendar help us get ready for the new energy that will be ushered in on November 13th, the sixth day of this creation cycle.
In this workshop you will learn the historical significance of this calendar, how it works, what it is timing and discover how your life has been affected by these time cycles.
Course materials for this class are provided, so advance registration is recommended.
Barbara (BJ) Sadtler, RYT, MA, has spent significant time abroad, on her yoga mat, meditation cushion and computer keyboard. This class content stems from over three years of study on and with the Maya of Guatemala.
For more information please contact bjsadtler@breatheinc.com 630.334.7826 www.breatheinc.com
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 Harmony in Relationships:
Helping clients increase connection, respect and cooperation in relationships
A Nonviolent Communication (NVC)
CEU Workshop
with Myra Walden
Friday, January 23, 2009
9 am - 12:15 pm
Using the powerful and practical model of NVC, we will focus on helping clients enrich relationships. *Teach clients a model to increase connection with loved ones. *Help them hear what others are not saying; listen to the meaning underlying challenging words and frustrating actions. *Show clients how to resolve conflicts peacefully, and move beyond power struggles into cooperation and trust. *Teach them to express themselves honestly without criticism or blame. *Empower them, and support their blossoming by helping them identify, embrace and effectively meet their needs.
Register: Connie Murray ~ (630) 393-9800, ext. 240
Three CEUs: LCP, LCPC, LSW, LCSW. Please add $15 to tuition
Tuition: $60 or $40 each, for two registrants. Registration deadline: 1/16/09
Myra Walden, MA, LCPC is a certified trainer with the Center for Nonviolent Communication ~ www.cnvc.org. She was trained by Dr. Marshall Rosenberg, developer of Nonviolent Communication. She teaches transformational thinking, listening and speaking skills in schools, human service organizations, corporations and churches in the U.S. and Mexico. Myra has practiced psychotherapy for 17 years. She is co-founder of the Alliance for Nonviolent Communication ~ www.alliancefornvc.org
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