You will undo all your efforts in trying to help someone by proclaiming the truth to them if, in the course of that process, your own dirty heart is manifested. If they find out that you have dirt in your life, you will have nearly ruined your opportunity to proclaim the truth to them in a meaningful, effective way.  Having been ministering for a long time does not protect you from falling.  The missionary team of Paul, Silas, Timothy, and Luke (a team of godly servants of the Lord in Thessalonica) were very, very effective because when they did proclaim the truth, they were bold in their presentation, and they were also pure in their heart.   Some people who have great boldness and know the truth wonder why they are ineffective in trying to help people and motivating them to turn their hearts and lives to the Lord. If that describes you, maybe you need to take a long hard look inside. Our ministry effectiveness is greatly hindered if we are not thoroughly right with God.

      Then, Paul described a balanced ministry as being gentle in its demeanor. First Thessalonians 2:7 says, "But we were gentle among you, even as a nurse cherisheth her children." Paul boldly proclaimed the truth, but he did not sacrifice a proper demeanor.  You would not find that apostle becoming angry and mean spirited or vulgar in his conversations. You can speak the truth, but if you do it in a harsh or demeaning way, it ceases to be effective. Paul illustrates gentleness by talking about a nurse taking care of a little baby or a dear friend willing to give anything to another. 

      Paul also describes his ministry as that of one whose behavior is being carefully observed.  In verse 10, he said, "Ye are witnesses, and God also, how holily and justly and unblameably we behaved ourselves among you that believe." People are watching you all the time. They are not simply listening to what you say; they are watching how you live. Nothing undercuts the effectiveness of our message faster than people observing that we do not behave ourselves in a biblical way.  This is equally true whether we are teaching and training believers or trying to reach unsaved people with the gospel message. If you listen to the same jokes that everybody else listens to at the shop or your place of business; if you watch the same things; if there is no difference between you and the world, you might as well just be quiet.  Remember, no matter how gentle you are or how boldly you talk, your life is going to speak much more loudly.