| "Four Ways We Sabotage Ourselves - and How to Move Forward"
by Marilyn Atkinson, PhD |
What Are Your Inner Gremlins?
Do You Know Your Inner Gremlins?
You've probably already guessed: We're not talking about real mischievous gremlins here. Instead, our definition of a gremlin is more of a what than a who.
A gremlin, in coaching terms is a habit that stops people from achieving their goals in business or life. A gremlin is an internal habit or a feeling that seems to run on its own accord-something that rises up and then stops you from taking action on, or completing, a particular phase of a project.
However, gremlin-thinking doesn't have to win out. When you confront a gremlin and question its validity, you gain the wisdom and learn the lessons needed to bypass it. To start, try asking yourself gremlin-busting questions, like: Where in my life do I suffer from self-sabotaging mechanisms? How will my life change as I learn to let go of these gremlins? Self-sabotaging behavior is one example of a gremlin. Let's look in details at what the four key gremlins are.
Fear of dreaming
Some people are afraid to even consider their dreams, such as: starting a business or meeting a great partner, training for a marathon. Maybe they don't believe they have the talent, intelligence or self-worth for these desires to manifest. Often times, past disappointments have been internalized to the point where they become procrastination habits. The result: being afraid to even consider what is possible. People with this gremlin experience their life from this place of loss of choice as if this were their destiny.
People stuck at this stage need loving support to discover their true vision. Working with a supportive coach can clear up the negative activity and inner conclusions around this old fear system. People are often surprised at how quickly they can tune into their dreams and learn to make them real when they shift their focus and begin to see what is possible for them.
Fear of failure
Some people get easily inspired by their dreams and take immediate action. Yet, they have difficulty executing what they start. People with this gremlin can literally be a victim of their own minds by sabotaging themselves with their thoughts and beliefs about their lack of resources, capabilities, and skill requirements.
The fear-of-failure folks need to build the inner conviction that they are capable of making their dream come true. When these people explore their inner values and capabilities, they build clarity around positive imaging and results thinking. They benefit from establishing a micro-visionary practice while seeing what they are building with detailed step-by-step organization. Seeing themselves moving towards a big sales goal through achieving weekly targets begins to build their inner map of success.
Fear of upsetting people
This gremlin develops when people fear the dissatisfaction or rejection of others as they move toward success. People sabotage themselves with these thoughts and beliefs, blaming external conditions for whatever appears to be stopping them. Thoughts such as I can't do this because of my flawed culture, flawed government, flawed organization, flawed family, flawed relationship grab a person's attention and result in cynical observation or wait-and-see mode.
To move past this gremlin, these people need to focus on, reach for, and explore what they can control. And we can always control our higher values and whatever we consider meaningful in our lives. Focusing on these deeper values allows for renewed forward movement. Consequently, People who have been stuck with this gremlin will eventually move beyond the pack and the limited system consciousness they've settled into by connecting to their authentic, personal values.
Fear of conflict
This is the gremlin that often stops completion of a project. One way this gremlin appears is as a fear of expressing authentic values when others might be harmed or claim they'll be harmed by this expression. Another way this shows up is through time and priority management conflicts. We play it safe and remain in indecision rather than moving forward. Instead of completing something important to us, we don't find the time. Avoidance becomes the gremlin - true? This is something simple and concrete we can all grasp - also you can have some fun here too... asking your clients...Have you ever tried a little avoidance?
It is only when we declare our deep commitment to our values, and learn to move forward courageously, that we can begin to move beyond this gremlin. When people dedicate themselves to focusing on their own inner integrity and alignment with their values, they begin to conduct their lives in a whole new way. They discover a new capacity for independence by sustaining their own authentic values. The person can truly begin to experience high levels of inner trust as well as inner satisfaction. The result is a legacy of purpose that can be passed on and becomes a gift to others. This is the territory of true inner and outer leadership.
Conclusion
The important thing to know is that it is possible and in many cases easy to tame and align your gremlins. How might you begin to apply your newfound awareness of gremlins to support yourself in living the life you love?
This article represents principles and practices taught at the Erickson College of Coaching.
To learn more about Erickson's curriculum, please visit: www.Erickson.edu
Marilyn Atkinson, PhD
President, Erickson Coaching International |
"Is Your Client Truly Coachable? How to know if you are working with a Visitor, Reactor or Creator"
By Rae T. Chois, MCC
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In a transformational conversation you create a relationship with the client that requires both of you to be fully present to support igniting the client's vision of full possibility and inspired choice. Why is it then that sometimes you do your absolute best to create this outcome, but it is just not happening?
Perhaps you've even thought that your coaching skills may not be up to par. Although we can all do with continuous integration and improvement of our coaching skills, there are other factors that come into play here as well.
At the outset of the conversation, you might notice three types of responses given by people who enter a conversation with you. The response the person gives has him or her enter a temporary category.
We call them visitors, reactors (complainers), and creators (customers). Yes, these categories are cartoony. The distinctions are only shared to allow us to develop appropriate strategies for the types of responses and the conversational approaches that might be required to best support the person on any particular day.
After you have built rapport and the person has agreed to the coaching conversation, you ask a contracting question, such as: "We have about 30 minutes together. If this was the best use of your time and you had the best possible results from our conversation, what would that be?" After this question, you listen for the person's response and notice the type of focus and aim that the person takes.
Your clients will fall into three general categories:
Visitors
A client may have been told or otherwise directed to have a conversation with you. For instance, an employee sent by a manager, a teenager sent by a parent or husband sent by a wife. Without buy-in from the client to have the transformational conversation that allows for a desired change, the person may only be a visitor. Visitors do not have a desire to change things. The visitor may not recognize the need for change because they do not have a goal to achieve or a challenge to solve.
If you have a conversation with a visitor, look for and complement their strengths and positive points. Through the power of your warm questions, you can find what is most important to them. They might discover the personal value that would inspire them and move them towards the change they want. Notice that if they walk away, they were never a client.
Reactors
Reactors have a complaint and a desire to achieve a goal by altering things, yet because they focus on what they do not want, they are not ready to take the necessary action to get the results. Notice that they want results but don't know how to get them. They have forgotten their true focus and have listened to their inner fears, doubts, or other emotional conclusions about themselves or others. Before this person can begin a true coaching conversation, he or she needs to take aim again.
If you have a reactor in a conversation, ask the person to think of something they want to happen. For example, you might say, "If you don't want XYZ, what do you want instead?" Another good question might be, "What do you want from this situation that is within your control to do something about?"
Creators
When a person is truly ready and willing to do something about a desired aim, they are a creator! You will find that creators are inspired and motivated by what they want and just need to figure out how to make it happen.
You must have a creator - someone who knows what they want and is willing to do what it takes to get it - to have a transformational conversation.
The person with whom you are connecting must state what they want in the positive, it must be within their control to do something about, and they must know how they will know if they have achieved it.
Remember, these categories were made up to illustrate a point. They are temporary categories and fluid in nature. Keep in mind that if you judge and pigeonhole your clients into one of these categories, not only will they sense it at a deeper level, but it will also impact your capacity to effectively coach them. Given that, keeping these categories in mind while listening from a detached and expansive place will enable you to attend to your client's needs more thoroughly!
Rae T. Chois,
ICF Master Certified Coach |
"3 Tips to Help You Propel Your Business"
By Teresia LaRocque, MCC
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Greetings!
And hello Fellow Self Employed Professionals!
Were you on the Passion into Profit informational call yesterday? If not you can listen to it here.
We covered information that is beneficial to any self employed professional wanting to take their business to the next level. I thought I would share with you a brief overview of what we talked about:
1. Embracing the entrepreneurial mindset.
People don't buy your profession, they buy results. Do you have absolute clarity of who you are as a professional and the benefits you offer? Getting crystal clear on your Credo (credo has been referred to as the window to the soul of a business) creates confidence and conviction, which is very attractive!
· Who is your ideal client?
· What do you do?
· What are the benefits of your services (from your client's perspective)?
When we know who our ideal client is and what we bring to the table, we master the process of enrolling and shift from promotion to attraction.
2. What is your strategy to GO Public?
Yes, you need a clear concrete strategy. I recommend creating a 90 Day Marketing Plan to get the momentum going. Marketing your services can be fun. Clarify your "attractive abilities." Attractive abilities are activities that you are not only good at but also love to do (please note: both of these qualities must be present to be attractive abilities). We all have unique gifts and talents. What would it be like if you set up your marketing campaign aligned with things you love to do? We can build our business doing what we love!
3. Does your environment support you in being your best?
One of the key strategies of highly effective people is they put themselves in environments (tools, ideas, and people) that "drive" or "pull" them in the direction of their most important goals. Rather than change our conditioning and habits through will power and discipline, consciously creating empowering environments allows us to instead change the things around us that influence our conditions and habits, so that our natural brilliance and talents are uncovered.
What environment are you part of that is directly supporting you in building a profitable business?
"You are a product of your environment. So choose the environment that will best develop you toward your objective. Analyze your life in terms of its environment. Are the things around you helping you toward success, or are they holding you back?"
~ W. Clement Stone American Businessman, Author
To hear more business building strategies listen to the recording of our informational call for the Passion into Profit program by clicking here.
One step at a time we can turn our Passion into Profit!
Your catalyst in living your best life.
Teresia LaRocque, ICF Master Certified Coach
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Los Angeles & Orlando Coach Training Intensives
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The time to achieve Certification can take as long as 12 months. If your aim is to complete coach training in as little time as possible, we invite you to take Erickson's International Coach Federation Accredited Fast Track "The Art & Science of Coaching"! The Fast Track training lets you complete all 4 core training modules in as little as 10 weeks in a two part training format.
Erickson's unique approach to coaching using a Solution Focused approach is not offered in any other coach training program currently available! The Art & Science of Coaching equips you with the complete skills to work in business and as a personal professional coach. Take the opportunity to make coaching excellence your reality.
Become the coach you imagine yourself to be!
Venue: Sheraton Gateway Hotel
Module I: April 8 - 11, 2010
Module II: April 15 - 18, 2010
Module III: May 13 - 16, 2010
Module IV: May 20 - 23, 2010
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Module I: December 6 - 9
Module II: December 11 - 14
Module III: January 16 - 19
Module IV: January 21- 24
Venue: The DoubleTree Castle Hotel
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Upcoming Coach Training Programs
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For additional information about the programs or to register, please contact our enrollment advisors at 604.879.5600 Toll Free 1.800.665.6949 or via email info@erickson.edu
COACHING FORWARD - FREE PROGRAM ONLINE: November 28th, 9 am to 1 pm, PST  Experience this energetic, dynamic and fun initiation into coaching. This powerful information will give you an insight into a useful set of coaching skills that draw on dynamic frameworks of Erickson's Solution-Focused Coaching.
This 4 hour course is designed so you have a taste of the Erickson appoach to coaching for those interested in in-person training or the online programs
Date: November 28th, 9 am - 1 pm, PST
Click here to learn more and WATCH Richard Hyams, Senior Trainer and Program Developer, and the originator of the Coaching Forward program, describe this exciting program!
THE ART & SCIENCE OF COACHING
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Erickson offers you a unique approach to coaching that is not offered in any other coach training program currently available. Take the opportunity to make coaching excellence your reality. Become the coach you imagine yourself to be. Click here for more information about the program, venues and times.
Modules 1 to 4 can be taken in person or online, or in combination.
Module 5 can be taken in one of three classes offered each year.
MODULE V: If you wish to become ICF credentialing and are ready to begin Module V, call Erickson College Vancouver for Winter (class full) and Spring 2010 scheduling information and details.
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Los Angeles: Module I starts April 8
International dates: see the website calendar
THE ART AND SCIENCE OF COACHING
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Module I Starts December 2, 2009
Wednesdays, 3:30-7-30 pm PST
 With The Art & Science of Coaching ONLINE L.I.V.E. you gain coaching skills that you can apply right away. This course is the same as our comprehensive in person coach training, only done from the comfort of your own home or office, from anywhere in the world.It is a dynamic , interactive learning environment and a wonderful unfolding of our professional training program, that we are certain you will enjoy!
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NLP MASTER PRACTITIONER PROGRAM
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 NLP MASTER Practitioner Certification
Coaching EXPERT PERFORMANCE
Starts December 3rd, 2009
True Master Practitioners are masters of language and behavior. This program will assist you to influence, inspire and communicate with great effectiveness and a deep sense of integrity for the principles trained in all of Erickson College's programs. Ideal for Coaches, Counsellors, Managers, Consultants.
INTEGRAL NLP at Erickson College is based upon the perception that an underlying structural integrity and order exists at the deepest level of human experience, and that this integrity manifests in the form, the structures, the processes and the contents of our actions, relationships, abilities and effective learning. What are the results of practicing this perception through systemic exercise? Deep heart-mind-body connection!
click here for more information
VANCOUVER, BC
Component 1: December 3 - 6
Component 2: January 7 - 10
Component 3: January 28 - 31
"Excellent, excellent course. It has provided me with a whole new way of living." - Eva Tinktin, University Professor
"This course gave me powerful tools to enhance the quality of my
life and those I am in contact with." - Bob Gottfried, TMG Inc.
"This has been the most beneficial course I have ever taken."
- Bill Fraser
"One of the most satisfying experiences I have ever had.
I have never felt as charged as I do now, thank you."
-Tony DiGiovanni, Paragon Development Center
"Excellent course. I will live this moment on with a zest for life.
It has allowed me to see things in a totally different perspective."
- Delphine Smith, Realtor
"I personally grew taller and richer thanks to the course!!!
(figuratively and spiritually)" - Jim McConnell, Counsellor
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BLISScipline A.I.M. - FREE Live Guided Practice
 BLISScipline A.I.M.
FREE, live, 28-day guided practice.
The BLISScipline Energy Practice is a 25-30 minute daily practice combines appreciation, meditation, future visioning, mind and heart expansion, and action planning for the day. Our participants are people (and fellow coaches) who are ready to step away from daily "overwhelm" and stress into a joy-filled, energized, engaging new daily habit of both BLISS and inner discipline.
For more info and practice times: www.BLISSciplineAIM.com
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| What Participants Say... |
Watch an interview with Rae T. Chois, Master Certified Coach and Erickson's Senior Trainer: "Education through Erickson College" (please click on the icon)  THE ART AND SCIENCE OF COACHING"Erickson College fully provides the coach with a complete package that supports the knowledge required to place every customer in the driver's seat of self-discovery. Thank you Erickson for standing as a leader in the coaching field with principles that put the customer first. I applaud your integrity and am proud to be an Erickson Graduate." Mark Marcynuk"Layer upon layer, a picture of an entirely different way of life emerges." Mike McCarthy"The atmosphere was one of the most supportive & safe I have experienced. It provided an environment for opening and moving through apprehension to potential." Blake Wright"Very practical and result-oriented. The theory and the practise worked very well." Ellen Gerde"So motivational & inspirational. An amazing learning opportunity. Wonderful people." Andea Ferguson |
Solution Focused Coaches Association Monthly Meeting: Building a Practice
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How to Build a Full (and fulfilling!) coaching practice
Hosted by: Lisa Princic
Tuesday, November 17th, 2009
Venue: Erickson College, 2021 Columbia Street
Meeting: 7 - 9 pm Networking 6:30 - 7 pm
After taking the 2008 summer intensive with Erickson College, Lisa set out with determination to grow a rewarding coaching practice from scratch. She has organized her top "must-have" and "nice-to-have" tips and strategies into simple steps to create a successful career coaching ideal clients that she will share with you on Nov 17th.
Contact Heather Parks, President for information and to receive monthly meeting notices. heatherparks@telus.net.
SFCA MEETINGS are held every 3rd Tuesday of the month. No dues however $5 contribution (by donation) is welcome. | |
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The Art and Science of Coaching
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Starts December 2
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With The Art &
Science of Coaching ONLINE L.I.V.E. you gain coaching skills that you can apply
right away.
This course is the same as our in person coach training,
only
done from the comfort of your own home or office, from anywhere in the
world.
It is a dynamic learning environment and a wonderful unfolding
of our professional training program, that we are certain you will
enjoy!
Module I Starts December 2 (3:30 to 7:30 pm PST)Click here to learn more |
Coaching Forward
ONLINE
November 28,
9 am - 1 pm PST
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Experience this energetic, dynamic and fun initiation into coaching.
FREE PROGRAM
limited enrollment
This powerful information will give you an insight into useful set of coaching
skills that draw on dynamic frameworks of Solution-Focused
Coaching
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