News from The Highly Sensitive Person Publishing Company

Volume 33 Inspiration and Information for Highly Sensitive People

2nd Quarter 2011

In This Issue

Making Sense of Your High Sensitivity

In my book, I reflect upon my life and provide a unique perspective on the lessons I have learned as a highly sensitive person.

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The Highly Sensitive Person Publishing Company

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"We lose vigor through thinking continually the same set of thoughts. New thought is new life."

~ Unknown

HSP Gathering Retreat

Celebrating the 21st HSP Gathering Retreat since 2001.

WHEN: May 26th - May 30th 2011

WHERE: Rolling Ridge Retreat Center in North Andover MA

Dr. Elaine Aron will be a guest speaker, via teleconference.

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Support Us

If you have benefited from the content in my newsletters, books, web site, meetings, or teleconferences, please consider making a donation or patronizing the online store.

"Imaginary obstacles are insurmountable. Real ones aren't."

~ Barbara Sher

Music CDs

Music Therapy for Healing and Wellness

These beautiful recordings use psychoacoustic techniques to gently shift brain waves in support of well-being.

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"Peace is not about avoiding trouble, work, and hardships. Rather peace is the ability to remain calm in the midst of life's challenges."

~ Unknown

Lavender Aromatherapy

Give yourself the gift of calm!

Lavender is ideal for those who need calm and relaxation. Our product line includes lavender scented pillows, sprays, and headache remedies.

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HSP Group
Teleconferences
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My HSP Group Teleconferences will give you an opportunity to interact with other HSPs in a supportive and safe environment.

This will help you understand yourself better, get feedback from others, and realize that you are not alone in your feelings.

Please email me to put yourself on a waiting list for future teleconferences.

If you like my "tweets" on Twitter or my thought-provoking questions on Facebook, please encourage others to join us. There is strength in numbers, and together, we can make each other stronger.

Dear ,

I love this time of year! Spring is the season of renewal and fresh starts. It's energizing to be outside, to breathe the fragrant air, and to watch the flowers and trees come into bloom. The great outdoors is a perfect and natural setting for HSPs to recharge their emotional and physical batteries.

If you're looking to get a fresh start in your life, be sure to check out this month's feature article, "Do You Desire a New Life?" As highly sensitive people, we have a deep need to find purpose and meaning in life. It helps to routinely take stock of our lives so that we can reflect upon our goals and consider new possibilities.

As you pursue new directions in your life, it's important to maintain a healthy balance and incorporate downtime into your plans. A balanced life is essential for creating your new way of being. Getting the proper rest, exercise, eating right, and making time for family, friends and interests will go a long way towards living your best life.

In this month's guest article, "HSP Spring Break," Brenna Gee shares how one highly sensitive mom keeps her balance during spring break "togetherness" with her three kids.

If you need a little extra help staying on track with your goals, you may be interested in my HSP coaching. I provide one-on-one consulting to help people better understand and maximize their HSP traits. Feel free to contact me to schedule an appointment.

Important Announcement: Newsletter now Quarterly
Due to time and budget constraints, I've decided to change the frequency of this newsletter from monthly to quarterly. You will still receive the same high quality content, just a little less often. The next issue will come out in July 2011. In between newsletters, I may however send out occasional email updates on different informational programs and events that I'm working on.

Do You Desire a New Life?

[img: ideas] Fresh ideas can invigorate your mind and help you chart a new course in your life. Your thoughts and desires can lead you in directions that you never thought possible. Half the battle is figuring out what you want. The other half is finding the motivation to go after your desires.

Clarity rids complacency. Whether you want a bigger apartment or want to completely revamp your career, any avenue of prosperity and achievement is open to you if you truly know what you want. Take the time to get in touch with your innermost desires and passions.

Here are some questions to consider. What do you want from life? What are your most important values, and what role do they play in your life? Do you like where you live? Are you satisfied with your job? Do you have positive relationships with your friends and family? What inspires you? What interests do you want to pursue? What adventures do you want to have?

No goal is too small. No dream is too big. If you still aren't clear about your desires, try tapping into your subconscious mind to get your answers. When your subconscious mind believes that your objective is good for you, it will give you the added energy boost to move towards your goal.

[img: Spider Web] Clear the "cobwebs" through quiet and alone time. Have patience with this process, and your answers will eventually come. Most likely, your answers will be linked to your interests. Examine your interests carefully and incorporate as many of them into your vision as possible.

It's important to visualize your objective. If you can imagine being the person you want to become, you are much more likely to reach your goal. However, visualizing alone will not get the job done. You need focus, commitment, and action to accomplish your objectives. Jot down your ideas, and formulate a written plan for specific action.

In order to help yourself develop fully, you might seek professional help, or the support of a friend, mentor, personal coach, etc. Ideally, this person should give you constructive ideas and act as a sympathetic ear for you to air your concerns, thoughts, and ideas. He or she should also hold you accountable for taking specific actions.

[img: risk sign] It may be necessary to take risks to reach your goal. You may need to change your job, relationships, or possibly move to another state. Learning more about yourself and what you want will help you make better decisions. This is why taking quiet time is so important. Gather as much information as possible on what it will take to make you happy. Sustained thought and information gathering will provide you with different options.

Highly sensitive people often settle for what's comfortable and familiar, rather than going for what they really want. Are you willing to break that pattern? Start thinking in possibilities. Consider what would be possible for you to achieve in the next three to six months. Leverage your ability for deep thought and creativity to construct a new vision and action plan. There's no better time than the present to start living the life you have imagined!

Overcoming Obstacles

The biggest obstacles to achievement are fear, pessimism, and inertia. Since these roadblocks originate in the mind, it's important to examine your recurring thought patterns.

Are your thoughts usually positive, or do they tend to be negative? Do you focus on the worst that can happen? Does change frighten you? Are you open to new ways of thinking and doing things? These are important questions to answer. Unless we examine our thoughts, we can easily get trapped in old, familiar patterns that don't serve us.

If you do get caught in a negative mindset, take the time to think about where these destructive thoughts are coming from. Consider the consequences of all possible actions, and use your intuition and logic to think things through. When you've made a decision, stick to it, and don't agonize over what-ifs.

Often times, having a "burning passion" to achieve something can you help overcome anxiety. When your desire is greater than your fears, you will move forward. If it helps, keep in mind that change doesn't have to happen overnight. Taking small steps over a period of time is a realistic way of accomplishing your objectives.

Understand that change is a process. Like anything else, it will have its ups and downs. There's no need to get stressed out over every setback. Make adjustments and realize that you're getting closer to what you want.

Always be sure to celebrate your successes, whether they are big or small. Becoming the person you were meant to be may not be easy, but the rewards are immeasurable.

Guest Article by Brenna Gee

HSP Spring Break

How a highly sensitive mom handles spring break "togetherness"

Outside, rain drips onto matted, grayish-brown grass, creating a wet Andrew Wyeth scene. It's day two of my kids' spring break, and the backyard is as inviting as a soggy bag of potatoes.

My children (Bryce, Josh and Anna, 11, 9 and 7) are only interested in sporadic yelling, flagrant put downs, and my attention. If the television is not mesmerizing them, they want me to entertain like a clown at a birthday party. Will you draw with me? Play a game? Take me to Target? I consider what's in store for me...ten days of balancing personalities and performing for the crowd. I feel the walls closing in.

Given this is my eleventh year as a stay-at-home mom, you would think I would be comfortable with chaos...but, no. I used to be able to juggle babies, lack of sleep, and little or no "me time." I put one foot in front of the other and the needs of others in front of mine. I was a devoted wife and mother, easy peasy.

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Then two years ago, my daughter, Anna, started school, full time. The house became so quiet between 7:15AM and 2:35PM that I could hear my inner voice. It told me to take guitar lessons and writing classes. It whispered, Become a Guardian Ad Litem (working with abused children). I found places to deeply exist.

Eventually, I bit off more than I could chew. I kept adding meaningful outside activities to my already full and meaningful home life. I was chewing big wads of living without knowing my chewing capacity. I resented having so many familial obligations but felt guilty for such feelings. I was overwhelmed.

I turned to a life coach to find some peace. My life coach listened to my story and asked if I'd ever heard the phrase highly sensitive person. I had not. She led me to Elaine Aron's books. I devoured The Highly Sensitive Person, The Highly Sensitive Person in Love and The Highly Sensitive Child (two of my children are HSCs).

Suddenly my intuitive connection with the moods in our home, my desire to do something meaningful, and my difficulty processing the fast paced lifestyle all made sense. I learned to honor my need to pause and reflect, rather than chalking it up to being inefficient. I also pared down my project load, determining that writing is where my biggest enthusiasm lies.

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As far as finding peace in the noise and stimulation of spring break 2011, well, it's a work in progress. I long for hours of uninterrupted time to write, read, daydream, and get things done. In reality, I am immersed in knocks on the bathroom door, trails of Legos, and bursts of child screaming. The difference is that now, instead of getting weepy, or worse, screaming back, I know how to get to calm, usually through creativity. I realize that the kids cannot learn anything when we are all over-aroused. I also understand my deep need to have space to breathe.

So, on this rainy day, in order to minimize conflict, I tell the kids to take turns talking or separate from each other. I retreat into the study to work on a post for my blog. A half hour into my writing, I notice the sun peeking through the blinds. I hear diplomatic discussions going on in the kitchen, followed by the back door slamming three times. Between the blinds, I watch all three kids run around the yard with broomsticks between their legs and magic wands in their hands. Aaaah. Calm + space = creativity, and eventually peace.

Guest author Brenna Gee enjoys her family, reads, writes, and daydreams in the suburbs of Minneapolis. Her current project is Space 2 Live, a website where she posts weekly essays about paying attention and finding your path to enthusiasm.

My HSP Coaching Service

Help and Accountability for HSPs

As a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP) myself, I fully understand both the challenges and benefits of high sensitivity.

Once I learned more about my high sensitivity, I was able to use my unique traits to succeed personally and professionally. The purpose of my HSP coaching service is to share what I have learned, help you accept and honor who you are, and teach you how to make the most of your high sensitivity.

My HSP coaching can guide you in the following ways:

Better understand your high sensitivity
Maximize your HSP traits
Set boundaries
Be more assertive
Make better decisions
Manage stress
Conquer fear
Deal with loneliness
Manage conflict
Gain self-confidence
Reduce social anxiety
Get advice on HSP careers
Survive in the workplace
Manage resistance and procrastination
Get advice on friendships and relationships

Please visit my website for more information on my HSP coaching. If you're interested in connecting with other HSPs for small group discussions, check out the sidebar for details on my HSP Group Teleconferences.

Please email me if you have any questions, comments, or suggestions for products, topics, or resources. I'm also interested in hearing from you if you have an HSP challenge or a desire to share your background in a guest article (< 600 words).

Warmest Regards,

Cliff Harwin
The Highly Sensitive Person Publishing Company