Cliff's Blog Radio Interview
![[img: Cliff]](http://ih.constantcontact.com/fs070/1102126619665/img/316.jpg?a=1103039611504)
Cliff will be interviewed by Elizabeth Ann Blake on the BlogTalkRadio Podcast.
AIR DATE: Thursday,
February 18, 2010
8:00 PM EST
TOPIC: Is it an advantage or disadvantage being a highly sensitive person? Cliff will take calls from listeners.
CALL-IN NUMBER:
(347) 857-4311
WHERE:You can listen to the interview live or
on demand at the blogtalkradio web site. |
HSP Friendships
Teleconference
TOPIC: HSP Friendships
WHEN: Thursday,
February 25, 2010
8:00 - 9:30 PM EST
WHERE: On the phone
COST: Free
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"A friend is someone who understands your past, believes in your future, and accepts you just the way you are."
~ Anonymous
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Free Movie & Motivation
WHAT: Viewing of the movie "The Secret" & Motivational Discussion
WHEN: Sunday,
February 21, 2010
1:00 PM EST
WHERE: The Arc of Middlesex County
North Brunswick NJ
Cliff will facilitate a discussion and share the personal transformation he had after first seeing the film.
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Making Sense of Your High Sensitivity
Get your autographed copy today!
In my book, I reflect upon my life and provide a unique perspective on the lessons I have learned as a highly sensitive person.
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HSP RETREAT
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Dear ,
 I want to thank all of you who have expressed your concern about my health issues and offered words of encouragement and well wishes. I'm humbled and gratified by your thoughtfulness, and it motivates me to stay on track with my "wellness plan".
As an update, I'm pleased to say that I'm taking steps to address my arthritis and diabetes. I joined the Princeton Fitness & Wellness Center, and I've made a financial and time commitment (3 days per week) to work on my emotional and physical well-being. I'm also seeking nutritional guidance. I'll keep you posted on my progress.
Although facing these challenges hasn't been easy, I understand the need to take better care of myself. I know that self-care is extremely important for highly sensitive people. Since HSPs tend to experience life on such an intense level, we need to be especially vigilant about managing our stress and keeping health concerns in check.
I've been getting many emails from HSPs on the subject of loneliness. Feeling isolated, and unable, or unwilling to socialize with others is a common theme. These emails were the inspiration behind this month's feature article about loneliness. In addition, I have included information about our social group, The Highly Sensitive Person Friendship Circle, and I've scheduled a free teleconference to discuss HSP friendships. There will also be an in-person meeting in New Jersey, which includes a free movie & motivational discussion.
Please note that I will be doing a radio show on Feb 18th at 8 PM EST on BlogTalkRadio. For this segment, I will take calls from listeners and discuss whether high sensitivity is an advantage or disadvantage.
Lastly, I want to let you know about the HSP Gathering Retreat, which takes place on April 8th-12th in North Carolina. It is being presented by Dr. Elaine Aron, Jacquelyn Strickland, and Ane Weed.
Please see the sidebar for details on these events.
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Are You Lonely?
 Highly sensitive people are not more prone to loneliness than anyone else. Everyone has some degree of loneliness, and it can manifest in many different ways.
Although HSPs often have social anxiety and may socialize less than average, there are many people who can feel lonely in the middle of a crowd. In other words, a sense of isolation is not always just the result of limited social contact. Many other factors, such as emotional withdrawal, lack of trust, or just not being able to make adequate connections, can cause feelings of loneliness and isolation. Thus, not only is it important for us to reach out to others, but also to do it in a way that feels comfortable. When we feel "safe", we are able to make much more meaningful connections.
The desire to connect with others and to have friendships is a basic human need. The conflict arises when we don't know what specific action to take to fulfill this need.
Some questions to think about:
- Do you feel that you're a "misfit" in society because you're different?
 While many of us have been conditioned to adapt our attitudes and behaviors to the mainstream, this kind of thinking doesn't serve us. Being different is not a bad thing. Rather than trying to be something that you're not, why not seek out people who share your interests and value your differences?
It's also important that we extend the same courtesy to others. It's easy to get frustrated when others don't share our world view. Perhaps these expectations arise out of our our HSP perfectionist tendencies. For example, we may get frustrated when others aren't as conscientious or compassionate as we are. The fact is that nobody is "perfect", and we all come from a unique perspective. The sooner that we realize this, the better all of us will get along with each other.
- Do you feel that you don't have enough friends?
It's quality, not quantity, that we should consider when choosing who we befriend. Keeping up with friends requires time and effort. Why not focus your energy mainly on the friendships that you find the most rewarding, rather than trying to accumulate as many friends as possible?
- Are you afraid of being rejected?
A fear of rejection occurs when your self-esteem is too closely tied to what others think of you. If someone rejects you, then your whole self-image is threatened. The way out of this is to strengthen your inner core and define yourself on your own terms. Once you understand and feel good about yourself, rejection becomes less of an issue.
- Are you uncomfortable in social situations?
Socializing with others is a skill that many of us haven't learned. It's not something taught in school, and it doesn't come naturally to everyone. I plan on having programs that will address this issue.
These are questions that many HSPs struggle with, and I want to emphasize that you're not alone.
 Keep in mind that high sensitivity is not a curse. Rather than trying to change ourselves to meet the expectations of others, we simply need to honor who we are. Our "true" friends and allies will do the same. When you connect with other like-minded and like-feeling people, you will gain the support you need to deal with any life situation.
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Connect with other HSPs
 If you are feeling isolated and lonely, I encourage you to join my free Meetup Group, The Highly Sensitive Person Friendship Circle. We currently have 220 members in the United States and around the world.
This group offers a relaxing, positive, non-judgmental, and supportive atmosphere. We have telephone conferences, teleseminars, and in-person events (NJ, NY, & PA area).
I'm in the process of putting together HSP Collaborative Teams. The objective is to keep you focused on your aspirations. You'll get positive support and opportunities to share your experiences. Please email me for more details.
We all need the support of others, and I invite you to become part of this growing, HSP community. You'll have a chance to connect with HSPs from all over the world! With the miracle of modern technology, there is no excuse, time-wise or distance-wise, not to give it a try.
I would also greatly appreciate it if you could help spread the word by mentioning the group, along with this newsletter and my web site, to others. |
Is There a Teacher for Me?
Guest article by Jenna Forrest
 There was a time when I was convinced I had all the answers. I mean, as a super-perceptive kid, I could sense what was coming before anybody else could. I was always waiting impatiently for people to "get" what I already "got." Surely, I had all the answers! All I wanted was to get out of school so I could finally run my own show. Unfortunately for me, I was only in third grade.
The thing that helped me feel better during my challenging grade school years was to sit alone in nature. Having keen senses, I loved listening to the crisp sounds of the outdoors, smelling the earth, and feeling the wind relax me. As I sat outdoors, I could feel an invisible presence softly comforting me, saying "remember me?"
As the years passed, I tried everything in my power to figure out my "purpose". My young adult life revolved around supporting causes that I thought helped reduce suffering in the world. Surely this had to be the difference I was supposed to make. However, because I was giving to causes from a self that was only half-full, I gave too much, and it began to take its toll on me.
 Maybe my exhaustion was a wake-up call. I had tried to do everything right. I was trying to save the world, but here I was, physically and emotionally drained. The presence that had been softly speaking to me as a child was again saying "remember me?" I knew then that I needed someone wiser than me in my life, someone very sensitive, and someone unconditionally loving. It occurred to me that maybe I should find a spiritual teacher.
I began studying with a teacher of transcendental awareness at a monastery in the mountains above the Canadian city where I lived. Her name was Heather. She had a voice that penetrated my soul and eyes that loved everything in their view. It was like I had hit the reset button on my life and had been given a fresh start.
I learned to see and accept everything in my life just as it was. That full acceptance led to empowered choices. I began to understand what emotional information I had absorbed from family, friends, television, the culture, and even distant strangers throughout my life. I saw how much this information led me off course.
I soon found a second teacher who was a certified counselor doing intuitive work with teens and adults. This teacher opened my eyes to the enormous potential that sensitivity carries. Through him I learned how to protect myself from absorbing unnecessary, unwanted sensory and emotional "information" coming in from the world.
 Having these new skills gave me the courage to write a book about my childhood called Help Is On Its Way. The story took two years to write. Telling it unraveled all of the fear I had about being honest about "the real me." After the fear was gone, a feeling of lightness I never felt before came to the surface, and my intuitive abilities expanded precipitously.
The more I learn about HSP's and our sensory abilities, the more I realize how many gifts we have that help us overcome our very own struggles. We need teachers to help us see them and challenge us to exercise them until we've become refined masters of our own sensory selves. Then we teach others. I'm convinced that's the plan for us. It only takes one moment of inspiration to begin the journey. All it takes is that initial willingness to ask for a guide.
 HSP Coach Jenna Forrest offers a free coaching e-newsletter, email coaching through an at home study course on inner peace, tele-seminars, and one on one transformational coaching. Her memoir, Help Is On Its Way - A Memoir About Growing Up Sensitive, helps to validate the painful and magical childhood experiences of those who are highly sensitive. www.jennaforrest.com |
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I'm very interested in any comments or suggestions you may have. Feel free to email me anytime. I would love to hear from you, and please tell others about us! I would also be delighted to have you follow us on Twitter or become a fan on Facebook.
Warmest Regards,
Cliff Harwin
The Highly Sensitive Person Publishing Company |
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