Social Gathering
Event in NJ
WHEN: Sunday,
June 14, 2009 @ 1 PM
WHERE:
"Brewed Awakening" (Coffeehouse/ Cafe)
417 Main St
Metuchen, NJ
(732) 744-9700
AGENDA: Enjoy a meal and socialize with other HSPs in a safe, supportive, and non-judgmental atmosphere.
Brewed Awakening is a comfortable, welcoming, and cozy place that has delicious food and desserts (see menu). It also has a wide selection of coffee and tea.
Learn more and RSVP for this event. |
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Making Sense of Your High Sensitivity
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In his book, Cliff reflects upon his life and provides a unique HSP perspective on the lessons he has learned.Learn More
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Physical Sensitivities
Teleconference
TOPIC:
Discussion on physical sensitivities, their impact on health, and coping strategies
WHEN: Wednesday, June 24, 2009
8:00 - 9:30 PM
WHERE: on the phone
COST: Free
AGENDA: Cliff will lead a discussion on physical sensitivities.
Learn more and RSVP for this event.
Cliff will send out the conference call details a few days prior to the event
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HSP Picnic
Save the Date!
On Sunday, July 12, we will be having a picnic at Colonial Park in Somerset NJ. This is a great opportunity to meet others HSPs in a beautiful outdoor setting. Bring your own lunch, drink, and chair. Rain date is July 19.
Learn more and RSVP for this event.
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Dear ,
Summer is finally here! It's a great season for taking a break from your everyday routine and getting a little relaxation. As a highly sensitive person, it's very important to give yourself plenty of opportunities to unwind and decompress from life's daily stresses.
To help you kick back, we have lots of HSP events lined up. On 6/14, we're having a social gathering at a NJ coffeehouse/cafe. You can meet other HSPs and enjoy a delicious meal. On 6/24, there's a free teleconference where you can discuss your physical sensitivities in a supportive atmosphere. And in July, the group will be enjoying the outdoors with a picnic in Colonial Park in Somerset NJ. I hope you can join us! |
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Do you ask for what you want?
 Are you the type of person who feels that you can solve all of your problems yourself? Do you tend to assume that others can read your mind when you want something?
As a highly sensitive person, I instinctively try to handle all situations myself and believe that others know what I'm feeling and wanting. Sometimes when I ask for help, it makes me feel like a "failure".
Over the years, I have been working on releasing some of these self-defeating beliefs. After all, they never make the situation better and only place more stress on my already overactive nervous system.
I have become more productive and have lightened my stress level by asking and telling other people what I want and need. I know this sounds simple, but it works.
I realize that you may feel guilty or selfish in asking to have your needs met, but there is nothing wrong with wanting to take care of yourself. It is actually one of the most healthy things you can do. As HSPs, we often expect too much from ourselves and from other people, which just sets us up for needless hurt and aggravation.
As human beings, it's natural and healthy to look out for our own best interests. It is part of the self-care that is crucial to our happiness.
This process is not easy. Old habits do not die easily. I also realize that it can be difficult to ask for things, because when you ask for something, it opens up the scary possibility of being rejected. However, you have far more to lose by not asking at all. With a little practice and patience with yourself, you will find that most people will genuinely want to be helpful and will respect your wishes. |
Dealing With Conflict:
My Lessons Learned (Guest Article by Marina Grinberg, member of The Highly Sensitive Person Friendship Circle)
As a highly sensitive person, I have always felt suffocated by practically any kind of conflict. The intensity and negativity of a conflict-ridden situation would darken my mood, and I would feel paralyzed.
 For example, many years ago, one of my co-workers seemed to be on a mission to make my life a living hell. This person knew exactly what to say to push my buttons. As a result, I was riddled with self-doubt, and I dreaded coming to work each day. I wish I could say that I handled the situation successfully, but the truth is that I eventually quit the job. Although walking away is sometimes the healthiest thing to do, it seemed an extreme measure at the time. Perhaps if I had known about my HSP nature and had better strategies to resolve the conflict, I would have dealt with the situation differently.
The following are some tips that I have learned:
 * Self-care is the foundation of conflict resolution. Taking care of yourself provides you with the armor to shield yourself from harm. Eating healthy foods, getting consistent rest and relaxation, exercising, journaling, listening to music, being in nature, and meditating are just some of the many methods that can soothe your soul and give you energy for dealing with draining situations.
* Knowing and respecting your boundaries is the ultimate way to signal to others that you are worthy of respect. It's a natural extension of self-care to communicate to others when a critical line has been crossed. Speaking in a calm and assertive manner can be challenging at first, but gets easier with practice. When you don't respect your boundaries, other people won't respect them either.
 * Don't be afraid to reach out and ask for help when you need it.
Discuss your situation with other HSPs, family, friends, or a mental health
professional. Never feel like you have to "go it alone". When you are
in the midst of a difficult situation, having a support network is
critical for maintaining a healthy perspective.
* Accepting yourself and embracing your HSP traits are powerful antidotes to bullies, including the one within us all. Valuing your sensitivity can take time, especially when you are in the midst of a draining conflict. However, reading and learning about your HSP nature can be very powerful. This self awareness gives you the tools to leverage your strengths and
minimize your limitations, which is especially helpful during conflict situations.
Connecting with other HSPs is also very important. It not only gives you friendship and support, but also a robust community to be part of. Instead of feeling isolated and different, you feel validated and empowered, which makes it much easier to accept yourself. Rather than engaging your inner bully and beating yourself up, you see that being an HSP is actually an incredible gift. HSPs are the artists, teachers, healers, and philosophers of society.
 * Understand that resolving a conflict is an opportunity for growth. The presence of conflict is a clear indication that there is something for you to learn. Conflict is often needed to break us open and force us to change so that we can see the world differently. Although I still struggle with conflict, I do the best I can to appreciate the role it plays in my life and to embrace it for all of the important lessons I have learned. |
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Proper Sleep is an Important Part of Self-Care
 Proper sleep guards us against heart disease, increased risk of illness, poor work performance, mood problems like depression, anger and irritability, and risk of unhealthy weight gain and loss.
How many hours do you need? |
Toddlers |
12-14 hours |
| Preschoolers |
11-13 hours |
| School-age children |
10-11 hours |
| Adolescents |
9-10 hours |
| Adults |
7-9 hours |
| How much sleep should you get? There is no magic number. Individual needs vary, and age also plays a role. Use the previous recommendations as a guideline.
Source: The National Sleep Foundation
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I'm very interested in any comments and suggestions, including other
topics of interest. My objective is to give you the
most meaningful information that I can. Feel free to email me
anytime. I would love to hear from you.
Warmest Regards,
Cliff Harwin
The Highly Sensitive Person Publishing Company |
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