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  Volume 7                 Inspiration and Information for Highly Sensitive People
February 2009 
In This Issue
Do You Love Yourself?
Thoughts For The Thoughtful
What's on Your Mind? Teleconference
Conversations

When: Wednesday, February 18, 2009 8:00-9:30 PM

Where: On the phone

Cost: Free!

Agenda: Share your thoughts in a welcoming, supportive group. Talk about your high sensitivity, your challenges, or anything else you'd like to discuss.

Learn more and RSVP for this event.

Cliff will send out the conference call details a few days prior to the event.
Highly Sensitive Vancouver 
Book Image
By Grace Kerina
Learn more
Social Anxiety Meeting
Stress Ball
When: Saturday, February 28, 2009 1:00 PM

Where: Belle Mead, NJ

Cost: Free!

This will be an in-person meeting where you can meet other HSPs. Cliff will lead a discussion on social anxiety.

Participants can share their experiences (or just listen).


Learn more and RSVP for this event.

Cliff will send out the meeting details a few days prior to the event.
The Healthy Boundaries Handbook
Book Image
By Grace Kerina
Learn more
Dear ,

Happy Valentine's Day! Thanks to all of you who have been sending comments about the newsletter. As always, we welcome your feedback, and please tell others about us!

(By the way, I now have a presence on facebook.com, a social networking web site. If you're a facebook user, feel free to look me up. I would love to connect with other highly sensitive people in whatever way I can.)
Do You Love Yourself?
 
RosesAs Valentine's Day approaches, do you take the time to appreciate the good qualities that you have? I know that this is the time to spread the love to others, but where does love truly start?

Think about it. When do you feel the most loving towards others? It's when you feel good about yourself. When you are happy, you are much more inclined (and able) to give more of yourself to the people that you love. Self-love gives you clarity, patience, and the desire to share your joy. You are also better able to leverage your HSP instincts to anticipate what others need.

It's important to notice when you feel "less than loving" towards others. This is usually a signal that there is something in yourself that needs to be examined. We often (unconsciously) project our own faults onto other people. Do your negative feelings really stem from the actions of others? Or do they arise from some deep feeling of inadequacy you have about yourself?  

DartsFor example, perfectionism is a character trait that many highly sensitive people have. It's definitely an issue for me. I have to watch myself all of the time. I expect to handle all situations "perfectly". I then "beat" myself up when I make a mistake. Likewise, I expect others to be "perfect" too, and I get upset when they don't meet my expectations. Is this really fair? Who am I to decide what other people should or shouldn't do? And who is it really about? In my case, it's really about me because I'm the one projecting my need to be "perfect" onto other people.

So how can you love yourself better? Here are some strategies:

1. Accept yourself the way you are. Have faith that you're exactly the person you're supposed to be in this world. You have your own unique qualities that make you who you are. There is no need to change in order to fit into another person's concept of who you should be.

Gazing Woman2. Understand your highly sensitive nature. That's the purpose of my work. My company's mission is to provide "inspiration and information" to highly sensitive people. My web site has many resources, including links to my book, Making Sense of Your High Sensitivity, my social group, The Highly Sensitive Person Friendship Circle, and other event information. I plan to connect HSPs around the country by having teleconferences and in-person meetings. The more you know about your HSP self, the more you will love and appreciate those qualities.
    
3. Watch what you say to yourself. Negative self talk is toxic and only draws more negativity. There is nothing to be gained from berating yourself. Remember that nobody is perfect, and mistakes help us grow.
    
4. Do something good for others. A little action or good deed will work wonders for your self-esteem! I recently found an interesting website, called Wish Upon a Hero, which allows users to post wishes that others can then try to grant. How would being a "hero" affect the way you feel?
Thoughts For The Thoughtful
"The love we give away is the only love we keep."
~Elbert Hubbard, writer

"You will find, as you look back upon your life, that the moments when you have truly lived, are the moments when you have done things in the spirit of love."
~Henry Drummond, writer and lecturer
Winged Heart
"People should take time to think, as frankly as possible, about the opinion they have of themselves. The belief in a person's own SELF WORTH is the most important part of their thinking. It is the basis of their behavior and mental attitude toward the world. People should think HIGHLY of themselves, even though they think they have qualities that limit themselves. A positive "self image" will result in a more relaxed relationship with self and others."
~Comment from Irving Rosenberg, a friend
Feel free to email me anytime. I would love to hear from you!

 

Warmest Regards,
Cliff Harwin
The Highly Sensitive Person Publishing Company