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Thanksgiving isn't just a time to eat turkey. It is a time to talk turkey.
The American holiday of Thanksgiving is just around the corner. In addition to having a delicious and joyous meal with family and friends gathered together, the holiday also a perfect time to show appreciation and thank the people who work for and with you.
Kouzes and Posner, in their best-selling leadership book, The Leadership Challenge, identify the five exemplary practices of leaders. The fifth practice is "Encourage the Heart."
Most leaders focus on results, the bottom line, and measurable goals. They let people know where the organization stands at meeting those marks. However, it is all too easy to stay focused on numbers and results and to forget that it is people who help you get there. Exemplary leaders celebrate both team and individual success. They acknowledge the value of those who work hard and contribute to the organization.
Jim's Story
Jim, a C-level leader in a global manufacturing organization was interested in getting feedback about his own feedback to the team. He wanted to find out if what he was doing was working and if it was sufficient. He met with his direct reports and explained that his way of giving them input and positive feedback was reporting the monthly numbers and an accounting of the goals they hit.
Jim was direct and got right to the point, "Do I give you the feedback you need to be successful and to know where you stand?" In asking the question, Jim challenged his own leadership practice. His team was impressed and very candidly told Jim that 'the data was the data' (the numbers) and not personal feedback or positive reinforcement (his personal perspective) and that they needed and wanted both. To his credit, Jim was open and appreciative of their candor and told them so. He changed the way he was giving feedback and included both data and personal feedback. When his team members saw the difference, they acknowledged their appreciation.
Carl's Story
Carl was concerned about how to motivate and energize his personal assistant, Mira. She complained that all he did was dump work on her, and when one job was finished he would say to her, "Good. Now here's something else." Even when Carl told Mira that she did a good job on a project, he could feel that it was still insufficient, but he didn't know what else to do. He finally decided to discuss the issue with her. He asked Mira what kind of feedback she was looking for. From her comments, it was clear that she wanted something more than just assignments and feedback. It sounded like she wanted to know that he saw her as more than a cog in his busy wheel and she wanted to be acknowledged as a major contributor to his success. Carl's response was something we often hear from "Driver" types: "I know, I need to do that TLC thing (tender loving care)."
Oprah's Story
Oprah, on her last day of her twenty-five year run on daytime TV, spoke about having interviewed over 4,000 people, famous/notorious heroes, writers, film makers - the best and the worst. From those experiences, she had arrived at one simple conclusion: everyone is seeking validation. They want to know they matter.
Thanksgiving is a good time to remember to show appreciation at home or at work. Remember, it is the people around you who help make things happen. Take some time out of your day to focus on them, not just the problems, not just the numbers, not just the tasks. Encourage the heart. It will feel good to you and make them feel good as well.
Happy Thanksgiving from us to you. We appreciate your support and are glad that you are part of our growing leadership development community. Thank you! | 
