Leadership In Action

Shortly after college, Tom and Eric started a small property management company, SMA.  Eric, the president, recruited clients. Tom answered the phones, mailed proposals, managed contracts and hired staff.

 

Their business grew. Eric and Tom's partnership was an ideal relationship - a balance of friendship and skill sets that complemented each other's strengths. Eric appreciated Tom's creativity, customer-relations skills and loyalty. Tom valued Eric's keen business sense and ability to seek opportunities. Eric was aggressive, bold, and a good negotiator. Tom happily assumed the number two role, managing the office and keeping SMA clients happy. He was the first to credit their success to Eric.

 

However, after SMA acquired two new property management companies, Tom's performance began to slip. Now, managing eight employees he barely knew, listing properties he had never seen, and servicing clients he hadn't formed relationship with yet, Tom struggled to stay on top of his growing responsibilities. The number of proposals and contracts that needed attention as well as new employee schedules, payroll, and commissions overwhelmed him.  Worse, he began to clash with Eric over financial errors and increasing customer complaints.

 

One day, Eric received an angry call from a potential customer who had received the wrong proposal.  The document had clearly been cut and pasted from another client's contract with terms more favorable than what Eric had originally offered. Eric was embarrassed that the company looked so disorganized and unprofessional, and angry that the mistake was going to cost SMA significant dollars. Eric concluded that he could no longer trust Tom, and yet, he dreaded confronting his friend.

Change Your Feedback Habits!        

 

Giving someone effective feedback takes courage and skill but is essential to organizational success. Use our Seven Step Critical Conversation model as a guide.

 

Step One: Start with Common Ground.

Eric needs to ask himself, "What do we both gain by having this conversation?" The "we" is important, because it immediately creates collaboration and the possibility of agreement upfront. It avoids creating unnecessary power issues and defensiveness. Set the stage so that both participants feel invested in the conversation. Try, "We both want this partnership to work." Or, "We both want you (Tom) to be effective in your role".

 

Step Two:  State Your Purpose.

Don't ease into a critical conversation.  Each person ought know the context and desired result. Say, "I want to talk to you about the recent problems with the client's contract, not as an isolated event, but as a reflection of problems in the office in general." Or, "I want to talk about your role as COO and what is working and what doesn't seem to be working."

 

Step Three:  Keep it Safe.

Ensure that the other party doesn't feel attacked. You could say, "I do want us to work together to find a mutual solution, and I don't want you to feel defensive."  If you say something that triggers anger, apologize.  "I didn't mean to say that with those words... what I really meant was..."

 

Step Four:  Explore Rather than Assume.

Share your "point of view" rather than the "truth."  Invite the other party to share theirs. Some examples: "The way I see it is we have grown past the skill set you started with - and we require something more from you now that doesn't seem to be there.  What's your take on it?" Or, "When you make mistakes like the client contract, it makes me feel you don't have a handle on the business process anymore.  What's going on for you?"

 

Step Five:  Listen.

Respect the other person by listening. Don't dominate. Don't interrupt them.

 

Step Six:  Work through the Conflict.

Once you set the tone for a discussion, explore options and issues.  Make sure that you acknowledge feelings as well as facts.  Emotions override logic; so if you perceive the other person is getting emotional, share your observation.  "I can see that you are angry."  Or "I know you are disappointed with the decision."  Then listen to them express their feelings.

 

Step Seven:  Come to Agreement.

Work your way to an agreement.  Summarize your understanding.  Create an action plan together to track agreements. "Okay, we've agreed that we are going to hire a business manager to take over the...."