If you study your worry thoughts for a couple of days, you will find that almost all of your worries have nothing to do with reality. Recently, I spent several sleepless hours dreaming up scenarios about how I had offended an acquaintance to explain why he hadn't come over to speak to me at the end of a class that we were attending. We normally chatted for a few minutes at the end of each class and this time he had left without speaking or even meeting my eye. I made a decision to email him the next day to ask if I had offended him and to apologize. He wrote back to say that he had left the class as soon as it ended because he was preoccupied by a misunderstanding between him and his wife. In short, I had worried about something that I had concocted and that only existed in my own mind.

While we cannot stop worrying completely, we can avoid taking worry thoughts too seriously. It is more constructive to notice when and where we worry rather than what we worry about. For example, you may notice that often when you feel relaxed after a while a passing notion will begin to coalesce into a worry thought. If you begin to obsess about it, then you are using worry to limit the amount of positive energy that you allow into your life.

Underlying this behaviour may be an unconscious belief that you are only worthy when you are doing things for others. By relaxing for too long you're in conflict with this underlying belief so you start worrying to get back to doing things for others.   

To know if a worry thought is something that you should pay attention to and act on ask yourself:

-Is it a real possibility?

-Is there anything that I can do to make a positive difference?

Most worry is about things we have no control over. A list of things that we cannot control includes; the past, the future, what other people think about us and our feelings. The things we can control are our choices and our actions.

Here's an action that you can take to get out of the whirling hamster wheel of worry thoughts.

1. Notice when you are worrying about something
2. Let go of worry thoughts by shifting your focus away from them. For example, you can concentrate on breathing deeply or become active to change your state of mind.
3. Ask yourself: What positive new thing is this thought trying to bring to your attention?

Worry thoughts can completely paralyze you when you are in their grip if you let them. Realize that you can grip them instead and that you can choose to release that grip and let them fall away. Practice doing this and you'll learn which thoughts you should pay attention to and which ones you can release.

When your unconscious mind runs an old program, you are on auto pilot fully in the grip of your old patterns of thinking and out of touch with your conscious intentions. If you find that you are often worrying, or being self critical, blaming others, getting into arguments, not being listened to, overeating or breaking the agreements that you make, you are mired in your past programming. Growing up is really about becoming aware when this happens and learning how to get what you really want in the present.

To learn more:

-          see the "No Worry Guided Meditation" in the Inspirational Videos

-          read "The Big Leap" by Gay Hendricks

-   "Awakening Mindfulness" Course at Harmoni

8 weeks of inquiry  through thought-provoking processes, whole body learning, breath activation and fun!  IF you are Ready to invite change and Transform your life, join us! Mondays 12:30 - 3pm  *begins March 21, 2011 

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