"A person's worst enemy can't wish on him what he can think up himself." ~ Yiddish Proverb
You are a very complex creation - a human being complete
with all the thoughts you think and the emotions you feel. When you matured from young adulthood into
the fullness of being an adult, one of the skills you acquired was the ability
to think through and to feel more fully the emotions you experienced.
Or are you one of those folks who suppresses his or her
negative feelings and shoves them into a dark corner of your mind labeled "I'll
look at this later?" That leads me to the subject of this article: do you go back regularly to look or do you
just carry around that dark corner like a millstone?
If you actually go back and think through what was untimely
or too sensitive to look at, then I celebrate your maturity. If you haven't taken the opportunity yet to
go back and look, I'd like to provide a few tools for you to take the load off
yourself.
Have you ever had a splinter in your finger that you didn't
want to deal with right away and then it become infected and painful? Those dark corner emotions are like that
splinter. Unless you get in there and
handle them, they remain there as a burden...a nagging tug at you and they keep
you from Being the Change you truly want to be.
How Can I Look at
What's Painful to Look At?
1. Have a little chat
with yourself and tell yourself that
you've decided to have a spring cleaning in the dark corner where these
unresolved emotions have been hiding.
2. Ask your Inner
Coach if he/she will give you a list of what is there so that you can examine
them carefully, slowly, with much love.
3. Write down whatever your Inner Coach tells you and don't
try to analyze what comes up. Just be with it.
4. Ask yourself if
the things you haven't dealt with are actually coming out of you in words to
your friends and associates. What are
those words? Write them down.
5. Gently inquire within if there are any fears inside you
that have kept you from moving forward on projects you truly want to put into
action?
Moving Into the
Sunshine
Once you've completed the five suggestions above, what can
you do with this information to help yourself unblock those emotions that have
been inside of you?
1. Shine the light of
courage on only one block of emotions. Because you'll be using courage, it
makes sense to begin with the one you least want to deal with. This way, you'll have the so-called hardest
one done first and the rest will seem effortless by comparison.
2. Tell yourself that
if you take a deep breath, think courage, and desire fresh inspiration about
this one block, what can you tell yourself about it in detail. Jot down some notes as the answers come up
from your Inner Coach.
3. Ask yourself what needs to be done to clear away
this block and create for yourself a time frame in which you'll do what your
Inner Coach tells you. (It might mean
apologizing to a relative; paying back some money; forgiving a maligner or the
like.) When will you do it?
4. Notice if you are
feeling more lighthearted just going through these steps.
You are a magnificent human being and once you remove these
blockages, the wonderful individual who you are can come out and be the glory
that was intended for you.
Celebrate! .... and please, begin.
"Self-sabotage is when we say we want something and then go about making sure it doesn't happen." ~ Alyce Cornyn-Selby
