The Wit and Wisdom Newsletter
 The newsletter that puts the glide back in your slide.
The  Real Coaching Co
Avoiding Procrastination and other oxymorons*

No 52
 
A very warm welcome to all new subscribers and fabulous new clients who have just signed up this month. Thank you always to all my loyal readers.
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Contents
Calling All Procrastinators
Why Put Off To Tomorrow What You Can Do Today?
Check Your Head For NIDs
How To Rid The NID
Book Recommendation - 4 Hour Work Week
From Floor to Soar - How To Beat Avoidance
Spiritual Chocolate - Duvet Diet Tip Of The Month
Quote Of The Month
 
Dear  
 
You will know who you are.  For this month I am sending our a clarion call to all the masters and mistresses of procrastination; those with a PhD in avoidance, a doctorate in distraction and those aiming for the Nobel Prize in not getting the ruddy thing done.
 
It's time to get out of analysis paralysis and stop using an ostrich with its head stuck in the sand as your role mode.

Now if the washing up suddenly looks appealing and you can think of 101 absorbing things to do from straightening paper clips to unpicking a Brillo pad rather than read on, you're exactly who I want to help this month.

If you can leave surfing on the internet and making that umpteenth cuppa long enough to confront the issue, I would like to share with you some insights into the whys, what-fors and woes attached to the pathology of "putting off".

Procrastination


 
"Nothing is as fatiguing as the eternal hanging on of an uncompleted task," once said William James and anyone who has "been there" knows the psychic and physical energy invested in not-doing has profound implications.
 
Practised procrastinators I have coached tell me, avoidance is the hard way of approaching any task.

The side effects are manifold - stress, dread, fear, missed opportunity, conflict, deception ("I swear I sent the documents"), penury, breakdown of personal and business relationships, depression, loss of trust, low self esteem.  I could go on but I'm getting depressed just thinking about it.
Why Put Off To Tomorrow What You Can Do Today?

So why do we do it?  Ok, it's like this.  Procrastination is a fear-based reaction to a perceived risk.  Avoiders put off tasks usually because of the following assumptions:
  • It will take too long/be difficult
  • You want it to be "perfect" and if it's not why bother?
  • You may get rejected
  • You feel you won't be good enough
  • You'll have to own it and own up - be responsible
  • Scared of the outcome - what if they say "yes" or what if they say "no"?

Check Your Head For NIDs
 
Firstly, what you need to "get" is that all these unhelpful assumptions are based and formed by your negative beliefs.  These can be entirely false but nonetheless frightening thoughts which love to tippy toe through the cobwebs of your mind, rooting you to the spot (or the Jeremy Kyle Show - even scarier!) instead of tackling the beneficial task at hand.
 
Allow me to introduce you to the most heinous, venal little critter  we give house room to - say hello to the NID - your Negative Internal Dialogue that loves to mire you in self doubt and low self esteem.
 
Chuntering away in your head all day with incessant put down and portentous omens of doom, it can keep you gagged and bound in dead end jobs, a brow-beaten slave to yo-yo dieting and a prisoner locked in Doormat-dom for evermore.
 
And the really bad news is that Domestos just doesn't touch them.
What does your NID look like? 
Gremlin
 
 
How To Rid The NID
 
Instead of reaching the human potential you deep down know you could achieve in this blink of an eye that we are here, your NIDs can doom you to a life spent watching from the sidelines as your dreams race past without you.
 
These NIDs are formed in a variety of ways; unkind words said by the playground bully, a parent's thoughtless comment, a partner's spite.  However you have contracted them now is the time to challenge them and re-wire a new supporting belief.
 
For example:
"I'll probably fail at this too" could be re-written as "I am going to do my best to succeed"
"I shall will be rejected" could be re-written as "In the spirit of curiosity I shall have a go and learn"

Turn the NID on its head and you'll find the prospect more enabling.

NID

NIDs tell lies
 
For budding entrepreneurs or for anyone looking to make their working life easier I couldn't recommend The 4-Hour Work Week by Timothy Ferris more. 
 
The 4-Hour Workweek: Escape 9-5, Live Anywhere, and Join the New Rich
by Timothy Ferriss by Crown
Hardcover ~ Release Date: 2007-04-24
List Price: $19.95
Our Price: $11.09
Buy Now
 
Here you will find some really amazing ways to reach your goals and there is a lot of useful information on overcoming avoidance.  As the author states - "and if we define risk as 'the likelihood of an irreversible negative outcome,' inaction is the greatest risk of all".
 
Invest in your copy today.
From Floor To Soar - How To Beat Avoidance
 
The good news is that's all the bad news out of the way.  I am now going to give you some sound coaching tools to help you beat procrastination and teleport you to the success you deserve.
 
Dare to try them on.  Challenge your fear and in doing so you will minimise then master it.  Your procrastination is just a bad habit you have fallen into and it can be overcome.
 
If it helps we're ALL afraid in varying degrees and life is about taking risks, big and small.  They are unavoidable so don't try to push them away.  You know from experience it only makes it worse.
 

Try this:

  • Don't aim for perfection but progress
  • Ask yourself 'do I want this to take one hour or six?'
  • Remind yourself of times when you have completed tasks in the past - you can do it again
  • Keep to-do lists to three do-able things
  • Do the easy stuff first
  • Be realistic about what you can achieve.  Take on too much and you set yourself up to fail
  • Build in treats and applaud yourself when you achieve your task
  • Ensure  you  have a good workspace (clutter-free) to support you
  • Choose to have fun with the task
  • Imagine  how good you'll feel when it's done
  • Only take breaks when you have achieved a sizeable amount of what you need to do
  • Be accountable.  Report back to a partner or buddy or even better - hire a coach
And with that in mind why not book that 30 minute telephone coaching consultation with me now [email protected] to take a really powerful first step?
Spiritual Chocolate -  Duvet Diet Tip of the Month
 
Spiritual ChocolateFor newcomers to this newsletter my Duvet Diet all about showing yourself compassion and kindness so you lose boulders of low self esteem and look great in your genes!
 
This month's tip is Embracing the Dark Side.
 
It is important to recognise that each and every one of us has a Dark Side, a Darth Vader shadowy self that we don't like.  It's the one that has unkind and unworthy thoughts, that is jealous, bitter, angry and resentful and that feels threatened and reacts badly.
 
It's the grimace beneath your smile.

Accepting that it's a natural part of your wonderful self, not dwelling on it, hating yourself for it or feeling you're somehow bad for having it, will enable you to fully appreciate and accept yourself.

May the force be with you.
The Dark Side
 
Oh, and keep sending me your SARKS (Staggering Acts of Random Kindness) to share in next month's newsletter.
Quote of the Month
 
"Procrastination.  A hardening of the oughteries" - Anon

Have a powerful day.
 
Your coach 

 
Carole Ann
 
*For those who noticed the asterisk
Apart from avoiding procrastination my other favourite oxymoron is an intelligent bouncer.
Have fun
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