Mom's Stroke, 5-day sale

MOM'S STROKE

Last month I began the December newsletter by quoting Dr. Joseph Mercola:

"You've heard it before, but it bears repeating: nothing in life is more precious than your health. If you take care of your body, not only do you prevent disease and illness and prolong your life, but you also vastly improve the quality of your life."

Just a few short days later, my mother had a stroke. Medical experts believe that 50% of all strokes can be prevented, and yet stroke is the leading cause of disability in the United States.

stroke

I come from a long history of women who have cared very deeply about living well, but have struggled to do ALL that it takes to care for themselves. I find it simply astounding that any of us can care for ourselves and our families as well as we do while balancing all of the economic and emotional needs inherent in all of this caretaking, along with trying to process volumes of information that can make caring for oneself confusing.

One family story is that my grandmother spent much of her motherhood on the couch asleep and/or suffering when she wasn't in the barn milking cows. Later in her life, she figured out how to live vibrantly, being a fabulous grandmother. It is said that during these later years she read all she could about vitamins and minerals, which she would continually recommend to my grandfather. He took handfuls of pills each day.

My mother is somewhat similar to my grandmother in that she has done a lot to care for herself and yet her life has taken its toll with 2 divorces, raising two young children on minimum wages, the death of a son, an adulthood full of digestive struggles, and about 40 years of smoking.

The day of the stroke, my mom was scheduled to help me at work at 11 am. She called 2 minutes after she was due to show up. It isn't unusual for her to be struggling with her health and needing to spend the day in rest. I answered the phone to a chatty, apologetic mom, who I couldn't quite understand:

"I can't come. I am dry heaving and exhausted."
"Should I come over?"
"No, I'm going back to bed."

After 5 minutes of her telling me that she was sorry she couldn't come and how hard she had tried, we hung up. I had no reference place in my mind for strokes and my mom, so I wasn't really able to sort out that she sounded so odd; that she was slurring her words and that I really had to listen hard to understand her.

However, throughout the day, I found myself telling the story of our conversation and asking people, do you think she is alright? No one else put the pieces together either.

About 5:30, I called her back. I was driving and on my cell phone. I was leaving my daughter Rayna's piano lessons and sort of in the neighborhood but heading home. She answered the phone immediately:

"How are you?"
"Fine, I just fell on the kitchen floor but as soon as this soup broth heats up, I'll eat it."
"Why are you on the floor?"
"I don't know."
"I think I should come over..."
"No, I am fine."

In the meantime, my 7-year-old daughter tried to grab the phone out of my hand, which I didn't like at all, especially since I was already multitasking more than I could really handle. I apologized for my gruffness to my daughter and put my mom on speaker phone.

Rayna listened to my mother for about 3 seconds. "We have to go over there."

With this long history of women not feeling well and wanting to be left alone, I was still confused about what to do:

"Mom, we are coming over."
"No, I am fine,"
"I will call you back."

Rayna and I pulled over and parked. She was crying by this time. "We have to go see Gran, right now."

"Okay, I will call Daddy and see what he thinks."

I called my husband, who is a nurse, and asked him to call my mother. Two minutes later, he called me back and told me to come pick him up at work and that we would all go over to her house. Rayna was still crying.

When we arrived at her house, she was standing in her dining room. The right side of her face was very different than the left side of her face. She hadn't looked in a mirror all day.

"She's had a stroke. I am calling 9-1-1."
"No, let's just talk to her. We can take her if we need to," said my husband.
"She's had a stroke. I am calling 9-1-1. I am the daughter and I am the boss here." After all this delay, I was in no mood for more.

Indeed, she did have a stroke. One of the reasons she was drying heaving all day is because her throat wasn't working. She actually couldn't swallow liquids. Every time she tried to drink water or the soup broth, she stepped one foot closer to her grave.

Strokes are very often painless and confused for something simple that doesn't warrant medical attention.

My mom spent the next 3 days at the University of Wisconsin Hospital in the Neurological ICU. Three weeks later, she is tired but she is NOT smoking, she plays cards with us, smiles occasionally, and tidies her house. I think she has a rich life to look forward to.

From this experience, I am inspired to share with you below the classic symptoms of a stroke so that you may be aware. I would add a suggestion which is to look in the mirror if you find yourself with any extreme weakness.

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Classic Signs of a Stroke:

*Sudden numbness or weakness of the face, arms, or legs, especially on one side of the body

*Sudden confusion, trouble speaking or understanding

*Sudden trouble seeing in one or both eyes

*Sudden trouble walking, dizziness, loss of balance or coordination

*Sudden, severe headache with no known cause

If you notice one or more of these signs, don't wait. A stroke is a medical emergency. Call 9-1-1 or your emergency medical services. Get to a hospital right away!

(Taken from the American Heart Association website)

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I wish you and yours good health always.