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Why a compass and not a GPS?
Of course, a GPS is the 21st century way to guide our direction; however, it is not a good metaphor to describe values. The GPS starts with a particular street address, which we could also describe as a goal. There is a defined end-point when using a GPS for direction. Not so, a compass and not so our values.
A compass, like values points us in an ongoing, never-ending direction. Values are in the here and now, "the always", while goals are in the future. Consequently, while goals can be achieved and then are finished, values stay with us continuously. At times they may shift and need to be re-clarified, but a value is never "completed". When we set off to make decisions in our life about what to do or how to behave in a particular situation, knowing our values gives us guidance.
There are many different ways of clarifying values, some more involved than others. But, there are some very simple ways to do so that can help us to quickly gauge where we are in terms of valued living, and to start pointing ourselves in the direction that means the most to us.
Try out these ideas to start out:
- Do some free writing answering these questions: What kind of person do I really want to be? What kind of parent do I want to be? What kind of friend? What kind of spouse? What do I stand for in this life?
- Imagine your 90th birthday party....everyone who has ever been important to you (living or dead) is there. Three people will be making speeches about you - short speeches of just a few sentences, saying what you stand for, what you have meant to them, and what role you played in their life. Jot down highlights of these speeches.
- Give some thought to your strengths and your qualities as a human. Now think of which ones you'd like to develop more deeply. Which qualities are most important to you?
- If you enjoy expressing yourself creatively, try out doing a personal "coat of arms", a set of symbols or simple pictures when put together tells a story of your best self - who you are truly meant to be. Share the coat of arms with someone close to you.
The great thing about knowing our values is that no matter what is happening in life, whether it's something difficult or something to celebrate, we can always make our lives richer by heading towards what's most important to us. |
Take a moment and think about how you find your direction in life. Are you making conscious choices or are you on autopilot? Because life certainly has its twists and turns, we can sometimes feel adrift just like a tiny boat on the waves without any rudder. 
