Today perhaps you chose cold cereal instead of toast and fruit for breakfast. Tomorrow you could decide on oatmeal. Sometimes it's easy to see our choices on a daily basis and yet other times it's not as clear. Are you choosing today to stay employed at your current job? Yes? That is absolutely is a choice you're making.

 

 Are you choosing the house or apartment you live in? Of course! You chose it originally, and you are making a choice to stay in it each day that goes by. What about something intangible, like being happy? Can you choose it over being unhappy? Well, we know that there are factors that could be out of your control, but what about the choices that are in your control? Maybe you are choosing certain behaviors and relationships that contribute to your happiness or unhappiness.  Often we feel we have "fallen into" situations and these situations have, in a sense, chosen us. The truth is, we don't fall, we choose!

 

An awareness of our choices doesn't have to be a burden - in fact, it can be a great gift! When you learn to hone your fluency in the language of choices, it can give you a tremendous sense of freedom because you will see how much you are in control not only of daily events, but of your own destiny.

All of us, at some point feel resistant to active choice-making. Sometimes it just feels easier to be carried along by the course of events, as if we were sitting in the backseat gazing out the window at the scenery going by. Making choices may take more effort, but the payoff is worth it!

 

Let's take a moment to think about what's within your control and thus within the realm of choice. How about your feelings? If you are really angry about something, can you control feeling that way? You may not be able to "choose" away your anger, but you can choose how long you want to stay angry, what to do with that anger, and to a great extent, what the outcome is...at least on your end of the situation. What about your habits and patterns? Who is in control of those? You may feel that it's impossible to choose a different way to do things, but in reality, that's not true.

 

From chronic procrastination to painful perfectionism, if you start to conceptualize habits as behavioral choices that you're making, instead of "just the way I am" or "just the way it always will be for me", you will get a completely different perspective - one in which you are in the driver's seat. 

 

Think about the beauty of that simple idea: you can live any way you choose to! You are not a slave to negative behaviors, emotions, or relationships because most of the time you can choose an alternative.

 

Of course, making new choices can feel challenging. But, a very small thing like shifting your thinking to the language of choice can have a big impact.  The easiest way to get started is to shine a light on your current choices.

Try out these simple steps:  

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