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KIND WORDS
Stop and Help
The author wishes to remain anonymous
Edited by Shmuel Greenbaum
Printed with Permission of Partners in Kindness
On a winter night a few years ago my friend and I were on our way to a party not too far from home. On the way we drove past a car accident; a young couple were standing on the side of the highway resting on the guard rail that their car had impacted.
It was a freezing cold night so I told my friend that we should stop and make sure they were okay. So we drove back around, I got out of the car to learn their status and invited them into my friend's car for warmth. They told us that accident was caused when their car slid on some black ice.
While we waited for the tow truck to come I realized that their car was in a dangerous position, jutting perpendicular on the exit ramp; so I suggested we move it off the shoulder onto a safe patch of grass.
Though damaged, the car remained drivable, so my friend positioned his SUV to slow traffic while the boyfriend moved his car. And we pretty much just hung around until the tow truck came and we knew that they had a way home.
Editors Note: Please use your head before accepting help from strangers on a highway; it could cost you your life.
If I Were In Your Shoes
From Kindness: Making a Difference in People's Lives: Formulas, stories, and insights
By Zelig Pliskin
Printed with Permission of Shaar Press
It's easy to view other people's problems and difficulties as their issue. It has nothing to do with us and we would never be in their situation. Who can really tell? No human being can ever know what the future has in store. Scary, isn't it? It is possible that you will never be in the same situation as this person. But that is only because the Creator has not willed for you to be tested and challenged this way.
When you realize that if it were the Creator's will, you would have the same life challenges, you will be more empathetic to the plight of those who suffer. You will encounter individuals who are homeless, deformed, or handicapped in various ways. Treat each person the way you would have wished to be treated if you were in this person's shoes.
Consider the following stories from my students:
I am a physician. When I treated patients, I looked at them as being a total different category than myself. Many considered me arrogant, and I don't blame them. Then I suffered a heart attack and I was a patient in a hospital. I experienced what it was like to be totally dependent on the will of others. From then on I saw myself in every patient I treated.
I tried an experiment. I dressed in rags and went to a place where no one knew me. I was going to act and feel like a homeless beggar for an entire day. What an experience! From then on I said a kind word to each beggar I passed. I remembered how much I appreciated the words of anyone who said something kind, and I was only doing this as an experiment. Afterwards, I saw myself in every homeless person I encountered.
I was financially well off. I used to look down at people I felt weren't driven to use their full potential to make money. I viewed them as lazy and unmotivated. Then I suffered a serious financial setback through no fault of my own. I made a comeback and while I had been close to losing all that I had, I was once again well off financially. This experience gave me a new sensitivity to the plight of the poor. When I was going through my crisis, I was depressed and couldn't think straight. I lacked the energy to do the things I knew I should do. Knowing what it's like prevents me from being judgmental of others.
I met a brilliant scholar who was unbelievably patient with those who had learning disabilities. When dealing with someone retarded, he was willing to repeat simple ideas over and over again. I asked him how he developed such patience.
"My intellect is a gift," he replied. "I was born with a quick mind. My speed of comprehension and total recall are gifts that could have been given to others. Each person has a unique mission in this world. I appreciate what I have been given. But I could have been given an entirely different brain. Even now, a brain injury or Alzheimer's would limit my mental functioning. Keeping these thoughts in mind I find it relatively easy to be compassionate towards those who have not been given the same gifts as me."
More About Partners In Kindness
Speaking About Kindness
When Shmuel Greenbaum has the opportunity to speak, he rivets his audience's attention through stories and audience participation. Participants come away feeling very positive and excited about doing something great. His excitement for kindness is infectious, as this student from New York City's Stuyvesant High School explains:
I was expecting to attend the lecture given by Shmuel Greenbaum for one period. I ended up staying for four. It is so uplifting, so enlightening, so refreshing to hear someone like him talk, to simply bubble over with excitement at the thought of doing good in the world. He is in his way a role model to us all. You think to yourself, "If only everyone else could practice kindness in the way that Shmuel Greenbaum has, the world would truly be a better place."
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Kind Words is a free weekly e-mail distributed by Partners In Kindness.
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If you have permission to reprint this e-mail, please ensure that you reprint the entire e-mail (including this notice).
Names of people, places, and other details mentioned in these stories may have been changed to protect privacy.
Kindness is like music, art, sports or any other discipline -- it can only be mastered with practice, training, and lots and lots of encouragement. That is what Partners in Kindness is trying to promote.
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