This week I'm presenting another writing conference -- this one on voice. I have provided my quick assessment of the piece as well as my response to the student. As a reminder, there are many paths to take during any conference. In each instance we need to evaluate the writing and ask ourselves, "What does this young writer need most at this moment?" Refrain from trying to teach more than one skill each time. (I begin by setting a goal -- one that aligns with the day's mini-lesson. It helps to keep me on track!)
You may look at the sample writing below and determine that you would have taken a different route -- one that no doubt would yield similar or equally positive results. Feel free to share your ideas. If I receive enough emails, I'll post the alternatives. It's good to remember that teaching writing will always be an art, not a science. Follow your best instincts.
Happy Writing!
Jennifer
|
|
Conference on Voice
Goal Setting: Webb' read me your piece, and I will listen for your voice.
Webb's Writing:
One day my friend and I went sledding. The hill was really bumpy and the sleds went fast! I grabbed my friend's sled and we turned around and around out of control. At the bottom of the hill was a frozen pond. When we tried to get up off our sleds, we fell back down.
Assessment: Emerging Voice.
One quick way to determine if voice is present in a piece is to ask: What might a reader know about this writer that is not stated in the words? (He's a risk-taker.)
My Response:
Reflect: Webb, you wrote about a day when you and your friends went sledding down a bumpy hill. You grabbed your friend's sled and turned around. When you got to the bottom, there was an icy pond. You slipped trying to stand up.
Point to what the writer is doing well: Your voice came through when you wrote, "I grabbed my friend's sled and we turned around and around out of control." This sentence tells me that you don't mind the speed, that you like things that are scary-fast. (Webb nods confirming my interpretation of his meaning.)
Question to lead the writer to revision: How did you feel when you saw the pond at the bottom of the hill? (Scared) What do you do when you're sledding and you're scared? (I close my eyes.) You closed your eyes? (He nods.) That's a detail that brings out your voice! And what did you and your friend do when you tried to stand up on the ice, but couldn't? (We laughed and kept trying over and over again.) That detail brings out your voice as well! How can you add those details?
Mini-Lesson on Voice
- If Webb adds those details, invite him to co-teach the mini-lesson the next day. Have him read the piece as originally written, then ask him to read it again with the details added.
- Project two pieces of writing, one with voice, one without. (Not your own students' writing.) Ask, which of these has more voice. Why?
- Read Rain Romp by Jane Kurtz. On a rereading, ask students to stop you when they hear voice. Discuss why these sentences bring voice to the work.
|
