Hi everyone,  I wanted to take this moment in time to share with you what God has laid so heavily on my heart.  I pray that this message is timely and that after you read it that burdens would be lifted and that spirit of the Lord will fall on you wherever you are.  I want you to know that you are always in my prayers and in my thoughts.  I don't have to know you personally but God do and that is what matters the most. 

 

Beautifully Speaking,

sonya walker
essance

 

 

Recently, I have been trying to deal with many things such as my insecurities, fears, circumstances, and situations of how am I going to do all of this?  If I worked on one thing then the other thing would require my attention.  If I did this, I now had to turn around and do that.  I know you can testify that if it ain't one thing it is another.  People have this perception that you have it all together at all times, and trying to live up to their expectations can kill you.  Right now, I need to honest with you I get tired of people trying to make me live up to a higher standard than they have for themselves, which leaves you in a state of not being able to release, 'what is going on with yourself.'  If you state your worries and concerns then they tell you, 'No, not you, I thought you were a Christian, or a man or woman of God?"

 

So we walk around with the heavy burdens,  trying to handle and juggle the  many complexities of life.  When God first laid this message on my heart, I was riding along the streets of  Florida worried about the many things I left behind and the many things I would have to return to only to find myself with tears streaming down my face asking God who can I trust with the matters of my heart. 

Lord, you see the last time I gave somebody my heart they hurt me, dropped me, and left me.  I trusted them with my whole heart and they just trampled on it.  Lord, and now when I try to mention my concerns, they just blow it off or say I don't want to talk about it.  So, Lord who can I turn to, I listen to everybody else but who is going to listen to me.  I could hear the Lord say, give it to Jesus, give it to Jesus.  It wasn't loud but softly give it to Jesus.  Some of you right now, the Lord is saying, I know they hurt you, but I will never leave you nor forsake you. God said, 'I am the Lord thy God and I change not."  I will not love you  and leave you.  Have you ever had people to take your kindness for weakness, or better yet just take you for granted.  Jesus is not that way.

 

As I was writing this, God said sex can't do it, a man or a woman can't do it, Buddha is just going to sit there with arms folded, Confusious is confusing, Muhammad can't do it but His name is Jesus, the lover of your soul.

 

I thought that when you gave your life to Christ, that was going to be the last time you had to make that stand but I have learned that all throughout your life you must continously give it to him.  You don't have to wait to go to church to build an altar.  Build it in your home, on your job, in your car, it doesn't matter wherever you are God is right there with you.  He said if you make your bed in hell I will be there.

 

Last night, my altar was on my bed with tears falling from my eyes, and a gut wrenching cry of, 'Lord help me through this, I can't do this, nobody understands me, why aren't they concerned about me,  why am I having to bear this weight alone, what if I make another mistake,  pleading with God please don't let them hurt me, I can't bear the thought of somebody hurting me again, they don't treat me like I treat them, the devil tried to make me think that my life wasn't worth living and place thoughts of suicide in my head.  You see if you never been wounded by people then you wouldn't understand this cry, oh but if you ever been left alone then you understand all too well.  By the time I finished crying, God started speaking through me to myself.  I started saying things like I am valuable, God is with me, He is for me, what they meant for evil God is turning it around for my good.  God has a plan for my life and it is good.  God kept telling me you are a diamond in the rough, and people don't know how to handle a rare diamond.  He kept telling me don't cast your pearls before swine because they will trample on it.  I speak these same words to you that they will bring forth life in you.  You are valuable to God.

 

I feel like lifting Him up, for the bible says, 'that weeping may endure for a night but joy comes in the morning, problems are still here but I have peace in the midst of the storm.'  The bible says, in Psalms 61 that He heard my cry that when my heart is overwhelmed; He lead me to the rock (Jesus) that is higher than I.' Jesus is your shelter in the times of storm.  He is the lily of the valley, everything you and I need is in Him; This morning I woke up feeling a sense of victory.

 

Today my mind is clear, and my heart has been lifted.  Yesterday, I decided to seek God like I never sought Him before, it didn't matter what scriptures I  think I already know, it didn't matter how long I had already been saved or in church.  It didn't matter if I ministered or not, it didn't matter where I have been.  I decided to seek His face and not His hand.  I want to know God now!  While your trying to live up to everybody else's expectations, wondering about what people think,  have you become complacent in your relationship with Jesus Christ, then it's never to late to give your life to Jesus.  He said behold I stand at the door and knock and if anyone hears My voice and opens the door. 'I will come in to him and dine with him, and he with Me.

 

 

Beautifully Speaking,

 

Sonya

 

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