Laughs and Interesting Stuff
Please build me a bridge
A man on his Harley was riding along a California beach when suddenly he saw a brass oil lamp sticking out of the sand. He wondered if it could be a magic lamp so he stopped, picked it up and rubbed the side of the lamp. Sure enough a genie appeared and offered to grant him one wish.
The man thought for a moment and said, "I'd like you to build a bridge to Hawaii so I can ride over anytime I want." "Well", the Genie replied, "think of the enormous challenges for that kind of undertaking; the supports required to reach the bottom of the Pacific and the concrete and steel it would take! Plus there are the environmental concerns. I can do it, but are you sure that would be the best use of your one wish?"
The biker thought about it for a long time. Finally, he said, "I wish that I, and all men, could understand women; I want to know how she feels inside, what she's thinking when she gives me the silent treatment, why she cries, what she means when she says nothing's wrong, why she snaps and complains when I try to help, and how I can make a woman truly happy." The Genie thought about that for a minute and asked, "Do you want two lanes or four on that bridge...?"
Life on the farm A Missouri farmer drove his pickup to the neighbor's and knocked at the door. A boy, about 9, opened the door. "Is your Dad home?" "No sir, he isn't; he went to town." "Well, is your Mother here?" "No sir, she went to town with Dad." "How about your brother, Howard, is he here?" "No sir, He went with Mom and Dad." The farmer stood there for a few minutes, shifting from one foot to the other, and mumbling to himself. "Is there anything I can do for you? I know where all the tools are, if you want to borrow one, or I can give dad a message." "Well," said the rancher uncomfortably, "I really wanted to talk to your Dad. It's about your brother Howard getting my daughter, Susie, pregnant." The boy thought for a moment. "You would have to talk to Dad about that. I know he charges $50 for the bull and $5 for the hog, but I don't know how much he charges for Howard." |