I have written on numerous occasions about the toxicity of gossip, and the importance of resisting any impulse to speak unkindly about people, especially without full knowledge of the situation.  I received this interesting and revealing story about Socrates from I'm not sure who, but thanks and here it is:

"In ancient Greece, Socrates was reputed to hold knowledge in high esteem.  One day an acquaintance met the great philosopher and said "Socrates, do you know what I just heard about your best friend?"

"Hold on a minute," Socrates replied.  "Before telling me anything I'd like you to pass a little test.  It's called the Triple Filter Test.  Before you talk to me about my friend, it might be a good idea to take a moment and filter what you're about to say.  The first filter is Truth.  Have you made absolutely sure that what you're about to tell me is true?"  "No," said the man, "I just heard about it and..."

All right," said Socrates.  "So you don't really know if it's true or not.  Now let's try the second filter, the filter of Goodness.  Is what you're going to tell me something good?"  "No, on the contrary..."

"So," Socrates continued, "you want to tell me something bad about him, but you're not sure it's true.  You may still pass the test though, because there's one filter left-the filter of Usefulness.  Is what you are going to tell me about my friend going to be useful to me?"  "No, not really."

"Well," concluded Socrates, "if what you want to tell me is neither true nor good nor even useful, why tell it to me at all?"

This is why Socrates was a great philosopher and held in such high esteem.  It also explains why he never found out that his best friend was boinking his wife."

Now, while you may argue that it may have been considered "useful" on some level for Socrates to have this information, it points out a terrific model for evaluating when and how to make whatever commentary you are tempted to make about others.  Don Miguel Ruiz, in "The Four Agreements," tells us to "be impeccable with our word" so that we don't slander or malign others needlessly.  We must use this "Triple Filter Test" to restrain ourselves from slamming others we may not agree with.

Believe me, I know how challenging it is, when you see things you don't approve of and want to voice your opinion.  Please use enough diplomacy to select the right time, the right place, and the right language to make your remarks-we have enough adversaries in the world, and it's time we learned the professionalism and mutual respect that allows for dissenting opinion without character assassination.

Wayne Dyer asks, "Would you rather be right or be kind?"  I'm asking for you to consider kindness, and trust that the right forces will interact to sort out our differences without unnecessary linguistic violence.