As loved ones age, conversations among friends or co-workers are more frequently centered on the dynamic of aging parents not wanting to give up their independence yet needing the adult child to take care of them. Questions abound - when do we step in and help? What can we do? How do we approach the conversation of them needing help? Is it time to move?

The National Association of Professional Geriatric Care Managers gives five warning signs that adult children should be on the lookout for and could be a cause for concern:

House - Does it look maintained, or is it in disrepair? Is dust accumulating where (at one time) she was a great housekeeper? Is trash piling up?

Refrigerator/Eating Habits - Does it contain adequate food? Is there any spoiled food present? Have his eating habits changed? Has she lost weight? Has she missed meals or has a lack of appetite?

Interaction/Behavior - Does she constantly repeat questions? Can he carry on an extended conversation? Does he refuse any suggestion or does he just agree with everything said?

Forgetfulness - Are there stacks of unopened mail or newspapers, unpaid bills, unfilled prescriptions or missed appointment slips?

Personal hygiene - Is he shaving? Does she shower less frequently, wear dirty clothes, or have neglected teeth? Are there any injuries that you can see?

If you start seeing any of the above signs that your loved ones are having difficulty making decisions then it's time for a conversation. The sooner this can happen, the better to allow more choices rather than reacting to a crisis which can mean a lot of work and stress and potentially fewer options.

When you have concluded extra help is needed, it's time to get proactive. There are several websites that will give you a better sense of what care giving entails and what the options are.

To get additional information about caring for your aging parents click here to read our entire article under Resources/News from JBA, which includes resources you will find helpful when starting the process of caring for your aging parents.

The planners at Johnson Bixby & Associates have worked with many of the resource people in the above fields and would be glad to give you any help and referrals that you might need for your parents. Please feel free to contact us with your questions.

  
Sincerely,