by, Tony Gerlicz

Director, American School of Warsaw

SFLC Sabio 

I encourage my school principals, the Directors of IT, Finance, Admissions, Athletics, and Curriculum to spend as much time on the balcony looking at their operations as they do on the dance floor

Get a View from the Balcony

doing what they advise.  We know people learn more from what we do than from what we say and the balance of the balcony view and the dance floor view is critical.  

There are times when on my balcony I have a feeling that rises that says, "I knew this would work; this feels good."  There are times, however, when on my balcony I see a mosh pit that fills me with a feeling that says, "I am afraid this is getting out of hand; this is terrible."  Leadership is like marriage or parenting; when it works, the world is correctly aligned and peace reigns in the kingdom. When it does not, my spirit diminishes, causing me to ask, "what am I doing here, anyway?"

Our Western world operates in polarities, right-wrong, good-evil, either-or, making it is easy to do what Parker Palmer refers to as "living the world apart." (Palmer)   Our political leaders remind us how easy it is to live the world apart.  In our professional worlds, often when we hear someone's ideas, we are quick to create a thought pattern that posits our experience is somehow more relevant than theirs.  We quickly create the world apart.  Yet, the consequences of doing so are injurious, professionally and personally.   Professionally, living the world apart is less fluid, less productive and takes more work.  Personally, living the world apart drains our spirit and makes us ill.  As Director of the American School of Warsaw, in Warsaw, Poland, I live in a country that has felt all too strongly the devastating effects of "I am right, therefore you are wrong" and "I am better than you and you are lesser than me" thinking throughout its history.  The world may know the history yet not all know the long-term challenges and struggles that living the world apart demands.  Polarities require management of a good deal of emotional energy.  

Yet living the world apart has worked for many in our education system.  The sorting paradigm that is our PK - 12 schooling creates many winners.  Independent schools and international schools pride themselves on thinking they are educating the "winning class" and statistics bear them out.  A system based on developing winners, however, also creates losers.  For centuries we have had an education system that has created winners and losers.   Many have argued it was designed that way.  Most national school systems sort.  We accept it.

Leadership in the 21st Century requires that we think the world together.  It requires that we create a system where almost everyone wins, everyone grows, everyone knows and employs their unique talents and abilities.  

In leadership, it has never been my intent to live the world apart.  Intuitively, I know the whole is greater than the sum of individual parts.  Practically, I know that when creative minds and open hearts harness the ethos of diversity toward the common good, magic happens.   Living the world together creates what Palmer talks about when he reminds us that wholeness , or alignment, is when what we do is an extension of who we are. (Palmer)  How do we find the internal chiropractor that helps us align our work to our values and bridges that gap?  Almost always, the needed work is internal, reflective, honest and difficult.

There are three simple questions that help me align my work with my values.  WHAT are we doing? HOW are we doing it? And WHY are we doing it?  Increasingly I see the power of these questions and the authentic connections to the mind, the heart and the soul.  I believe order matters.

When an idea is presented or when engaged in a meeting agenda, I ask the WHY question first. The WHY sets the context for what I am doing, and I know that when what we are doing connects to vision and mission, it elevates my game.  Then I can place WHAT we do properly.  I can actually see that WHAT we do is less important than HOW we work together.  Do we support each other's views? Are we listening actively?  Are we challenging ourselves respectfully? Do we suspend certainty in order to learn?  And again, WHY are we doing this?  Does the answer speak to a higher purpose other than, "Well, we must get it done?"  Does the WHY further the school's narrative?  

 In his 1990 book, The Triune Brain in Evolution, Dr. Paul MacLean, then director of the Laboratory of the Brain and Behavior at the US National Institute of Mental Health, expanded his notion that the human brain is made up of three layers.  He called it "The Triune Brain" or the "Evolutionary Brain" since MacLean posited that the three layers, the Reptilian complex, the paleomammalian complex (limbic system), and the neomammalian complex (neo-cortex) were established successively in response to evolutionary need. (MacLean)

MacLean suggested the neomammalian complex, comprised of the neocortex, arrived later on the evolutionary scene and is responsible for language, planning, perception and abstraction, tangentially referred to today as "executive function."  Another way to think of it is WHAT we do; it is the head.  The paleomammalian complex, or the limbic system is the second layer or brain to evolve and houses the primary centers of emotion including the amygdala, the focus of so much of Daniel Goleman's EQ work. (Goleman)  The limbic system links emotions with behavior and feelings, including emotions linked to attachment.  Think of it as HOW we do what we do; it is in the heart.  The reptilian complex consists of the cerebellum and brain stem and is the oldest part of the brain.  Reproduction, breathing, circulation and the "fight or flight" stress response are all housed in the brain stem.  The reptilian brain is concerned with physical survival; the responses are automatic.  Think of it as the WHY, the gut feeling we get when we know something, that which guards our existence.

The notion of the WHY, the HOW and WHAT being related to the evolutionary brain resonates.  When I know something in my gut, it rings true, it is who I am.  When the emotion I get resonates it signals true north.  If my heart and my soul are on board, the WHAT flows.

In those moments when it seems as if the mosh pit is getting out of hand, my WHY is my chiropractor, it aligns my sense of meaning.  My HOW is a second line of support.  To know we have agreement on how we will play, argue, and laugh together, provides the comfort and security I need to challenge and be challenged.  When what I do is aligned with who I am, contentment follows.

I take solace in Mother Teresa's words reportedly found on a wall in her children's home in India.  There is controversy over whether the words are hers or not, I have come to learn, but I share the words anyway, since I use them frequently in my quest for alignment.

 Anyway

People are often unreasonable, illogical and self centered;   

Forgive them anyway.

If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives;

Be kind anyway.

If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies; 

Succeed anyway.

If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you;  

Be honest and frank anyway.

What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight;

Build anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous;  

Be happy anyway.

The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow;

Do good anyway.

Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough;  

Give the world the best you've got anyway.

You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and your Spirit; 

It was never between you and them anyway.

- Mother Theresa

Works Cited:

Goleman, Daniel. Emotional Intelligence. New York: Bantam Books, 1995.

MacClean, Paul. The Triune brain in Evolution. New York: Plenum Press, 1990.

Palmer, Parker. Courage to Teach. San Francisco: Jossey-Bass , 1998.

The PSYCHE of a (School) Leader  

By Gary Gruber, DIrector

 

Psyche was the youngest of the three daughters of some king, her beauty prompted the jealousy and envy of Venus (Aphrodite). In order to avenge herself, the goddess ordered Amor (Eros) to inspire Psyche with a love for the most contemptible of all men, but Amor was so stricken with her beauty that he fell in love with her. He accordingly conveyed her to some charming place, where, unseen and unknown, he visited her every night, and left her as soon as the day began to dawn. Psyche might have continued to enjoy this state of happiness, if she had attended to the advice of her beloved, never to give way to her curiosity, or to inquire who he was. But her jealous sisters made her believe that in the darkness of night she was embracing some hideous monster, and once, while Amor was asleep, she approached him with a lamp, and, to her amazement, she beheld the most handsome of the gods. In her excitement of joy and fear, a drop of hot oil fell from her lamp upon his shoulder. This awoke Amor, who censured her for her mistrust, and escaped. Psyche's peace was now gone, and after attempting in vain to throw herself into a river, she wandered about from temple to temple, inquiring after her beloved, and at length came to the palace of Venus. There her real sufferings began, for Venus retained her, treated her as a slave, and imposed upon her the hardest and most humiliating labors. Psyche would have perished under the weight of her sufferings, had not Amor, who still loved her in secret, invisibly comforted and assisted her in her labors. With his aid she at last succeeded in overcoming the jealousy and hatred of Venus; she became immortal, and was united with him forever. It is not difficult to recognize in this lovely story the idea of which it is merely the mythical embodiment, for Psyche is evidently the human soul, which is purified by passions and misfortunes, and is thus prepared for the enjoyment of true and pure happiness.

School leaders whose souls are "purified by passions and misfortunes" really do have a much better chance to enjoy happiness in their work, with their colleagues and with the community at large.  While the end goal of most school leaders may not be mere happiness, it's a fairly good barometer of the state of one's spirit which is the accurate translation of the Greek word psyche .  

Karl Menninger, the founder and director for many years of the Menninger Clinic in Topeka, Kansas, used to ask patients upon their discharge from the clinic, "How's your spirit?"  In fact the psychiatric definition of psyche is " the mind functioning as the center of thought, emotion, and behavior and consciously or unconsciously adjusting or mediating the body's responses to the social and physical environment."   This is why psyche is most often misunderstood as "mind" as opposed to "spirit" or "soul."

I believe the "spirit" of the outstanding school leaders I have known can be seen, heard and felt in at least the following ten ways.  These are not in any order of priority.

1 - Enthusiastic and energetic - There are many different ways of expressing one's spirit of enthusiasm, whether overtly or more quietly, but we most often characterize this contagious quality as passion, thus strong feelings that are shared.

2.  Positive and optimistic - While best balanced with a heavy dose of realism, the expression of hope in the present and for the future is a quality of spirit that any good leader is well-advised to have in his or her repertoire of attitudes.

3.  Caring and compassionate - A spirit of genuine concern for others and their well-being goes a long way toward helping a community to develop an ethos of mutual support and collegiality.

4.  Inquiring and curious - The leader who asks thoughtful questions and demonstrates the spirit of an inquiring mind helps to further the conversations to a deeper level of understanding.

5.  Conscientious and intentional - Designing change requires a spirit that is transparent so that others may see how seriousness of purpose pervades the leader.

6.  Pleasant, friendly and joyful  - As one friend and colleague puts it, "be kind, tell the truth and say thank you."   Good manners, social grace and comfort in a crowd contribute significantly to the perception of one who is "at home" easily and genuinely.

7.  Confident and courageous - Unafraid to make hard decisions, even unpopular at times, the leader is able to take a stand, express convictions and move forward, even in the face of opposition.  It helps to take others along on this often perilous journey.

8.   Humble and modest - Without any need to be boastful, arrogant or prideful, the leader allows his or her deeds to speak for themselves.  Such a spirit speaks volumes without having to say a word.

9.  Creative and open - The leader exhibits a mind that seeks and welcomes new ideas.  This is the mind that works like the proverbial parachute, best when open.   However it is not change for the sake of something new.

10.  Fair and firm -  These qualities speak of a balanced response, an attitude that knows how to assess and when to draw the line.   This works with both individuals and groups and the leader's spirit sets the stage, the tone and the process.

Many of these qualities of spirit overlap and are part of a larger dimension of one's personality, having to do with attitudes and behaviors, as defined earlier.  The  point of all of this is that being aware of how these play in the environment in which one works can really make a big difference in the outcomes of so much that you want to accomplish and these make it easier to get a lot done without caring who gets the credit.  Most importantly, these are qualities for good mental and physical well-being.  

Learning to Lead: Serve on a Nonprofit Board 

by Timothy McIntire

Here is some gratuitous advice.  Put yourself in the way of learning what a Board is, why it matters, and how it works.  As you do so, hold both yourself and your Board to high standards.  Trust that what you do will make a difference - reason enough to pay attention because you should be careful to "first, do no harm" ( primum non nocere ) - and appreciate that your own growth in leadership will be indelibly advanced.

In many ways, today I feel as new to Board-work as ever.  It is Science and Art, to be sure.  And the greatest truth is that "If you have seen one Board" - pregnant pause - "You have seen one Board."  Everyone who serves on a Board wrestles with practice and philosophy for oneself and the corporate entity known as The Board.  Hence the collision with learning is powerful.  Furthermore, since each Board is not only set in a specific context but is also relational in nature, informal norms are as important as the formal ones.

Practically speaking, I have found it helps to have an opinion about common issues boards face.  Personally, I stay close to Best Practices - for us who serve in Independent Schools that means studying The Trustee Handbook and other seminal works - although I try really hard to be malleable to new thinking by experienced board folk - this is difficult for me.  Let me provide an example.  

Recently, I had the privilege of leading a Board Retreat for a school in Santa Barbara.  The School has a new Head and has been exceptionally well served by the past Head.  The Board Chair was the Search Chair and the Committee on Trustees is ably led, and by all measures this is a very healthy board that is arguably getting even better.  A sign, by the way, of a board's quality is that it learns together, spending as much as half its time doing so.  

The Chair of the Committee on Trustees had copies for everyone of Inside the Nonprofit Boardroom: What you Need to Know for Satisfaction and Success (Charles William Golding, 1999, 2009) that had been given to her by a local foundation.  She asked if I thought we should give them out.  My actual thought was "No, it is too hard to get independent school boards to read the Trustee Handbook much less some related but different well-intentioned work."  What I said, however, was "Oh, how lovely to have these books; let me take a look."  And I did.  And later I read the book carefully while flying home from Los Angeles to Albuquerque.  Being informed, I changed my professional opinion somewhat -- although my deep-in-my heart belief of the ideal way this should work remains.  The issue: Executive Sessions.  

First, I believe Mr. Golding's observation that

"Today's entrepreneurial trustee demands to be hands on."  This plays out as "a growing number of organizations, even those with robust staffs, now encourage trustee participation in the day-to-day work of the organizations, including the heretofore taboo areas of personnel and program development."  

Second, the conclusion that an "executive session needs to be a regular part of every full board meeting."  Mr. Golding's argument is that

"Executive sessions give trustees a chance to talk candidly among themselves about how they can better support the chief executive or to iron out differences of opinion among themselves or with the chief executive.  It is also a time when a board can look candidly at its performance and ask the tough questions of one another: Are we working well as a team?  If not, why not?  What do we need to do individually and collectively to improve performance?  When there is a climate of trust, it's far easier to make course corrections."    

Decisions around holding Executive Sessions without the Head present are huge.  Heads' possess healthy paranoia around the issue.  Schools are a specific type of nonprofit and their leaders are not exclusively chief executive officers nor executive directors but head teachers. I share my consideration and evolving thoughts on the issues of Entrepreneurial Trustees and Executive Sessions not for my personal conclusions but as examples of personal and professional growth brought about through board service.  How else can one wrestle with such significant issues?  Holding any nonprofit in trust, especially a precious school, requires that you understand the issues around why you do what you do and how consequential your actions are.  The primary reason that independent schools are "independent" is their being governed by an independent board of trustees.  If you expect to lead effectively and happily in school, take on service as a board member for a nonprofit.  You will reflect the population you serve, and bear "the ultimate responsibility for the health, preservation, and progress of an organization" (Golding).  You will also experience leadership meaningfully.