Relationship Concepts Newsletter
Four Levels of Love December 2008
In This Issue
4 Levels
Upcoming Classes
Radio Show Appearances
Quick Links
'Tis the season!
 
Since this is a time of celebration, family, spiritual renewal, helping others, and peace on earth, I thought you might appreciate a different perspective on love.
 
Wishing you the happiest of holiday seasons, and a wonderful, fulfilling New Year.
 
Blessings,
Patty
Four Levels of Love 
 
 

Concept

 

We frequently talk about the different types of love - God, parent-child, sibling, other family, friendship, passion for work, country, etc. I want to offer up new way of looking at love as a way of stimulating a new relationship with it.
 
The following discussion is based on four levels of being, or four levels of consciousness as I understand them from my spiritual studies. As you reflect on the past year and plan for your future, I hope you'll take these into consideration as you move forward on your journey of love.


 

Discussion

 
Many things can be understood based on the four levels - spirituality, religion, work, relationships, other aspects of life, and of course love. This is not how we typically look at things, so don't be surprised if it takes a minute for these to sink in. I think you'll find them valuable as you enter into a new year, a very new year in quite uncertain times.
 
Physical - Love on the physical level is primarily focused on things and is typically about pleasure and security. It's a one-way relationship in which the object of our affection is providing the result and there's nothing we give in return.
 
We love chocolate. We love our cars. We have favorite television shows and vacation spots. We take comfort in our cozy homes with a fire roaring in the fireplace (especially this time of year). These are things that are pleasurable, gratifying, and help us to feel secure. We don't have to do anything to return the favor.
 
Intellectual/Emotional - This love is about the people in your life, including romantic love. It is based on exchange, interaction - giving and getting - and on feelings and emotions. "I love my Mom." "I love my husband." "She's my BFF." These are all examples of love on the Intellectual/Emotional level.
 
This realm can be tricky. Many of us have what I call "distortions", false beliefs about ourselves, relationships, love, how life "should be". These cause much suffering and conflict. Often, this "holiday time of year" exacerbates our feelings of discomfort. The good news is that this gives us an opportunity to see where we're stuck, which gives us an opportunity to grow.
 
Creative - On the Creative level, the "emotional" feeling of love does not exist, though peace and joy can be present. Here, we do for the sake of doing, not based on feelings, shoulds, and have-tos, but living instead for our principles, the things we know to be right and true. We do this even if it's not fun because we know we have to do it. It's about duty, honor and respect, not just for another human being but also and especially for God.
 
Keep in mind that what's right and true for a 5 year old will be/should be quite different than for a 50 year old. Part of the growth process is continuing to question, learn, and take to new levels your understanding of right and true in all areas of your life.
 
Relationships on the Creative level transcend the feelings we experience on the Intellectual/Emotional level. Here, we are dedicated to creating something beyond the self, to healing, increasing conscious awareness, and fulfilling God's plan. This is the level of the Soul, and its focus is no longer on me or you, it's on the Greater Good.
 
Spiritual - Spiritual love is about inspiration, that inner impetus that guides us on our life journey, and our willingness to say yes to it. It's about responding to that powerful internal force, our drive to create, and doing so without question. It's about following our spiritual destiny.
 
Great examples of this are inventors. Do you think Thomas Edison loved light bulbs? Or was he responding to an inner urge that led him to his discoveries? Do you think the process of his work was all comfort and joy? Or was there hardship, frustration and struggle along the way? How much failure did he have to endure in order to finally succeed? How would you respond to that kind of call, that kind of purpose-driven life?
 
 
 

Coaching

 

We are accustomed to having our feelings. Life today has us living in a sea of feelings. The key to true peace is to transcend feeling levels, to move beyond them. That doesn't mean you don't have feelings anymore; it does mean that you aren't run by them. It also means that sometimes you have to work through difficult situations whether you like it or not. Sometimes we give up on relationships, careers, or our calling too soon because "it doesn't feel good." Growth, conscious awareness, is a process. It takes discipline and determination.
 
I'm not suggesting that we all become Mother Teresa or start a non-profit, but I am suggesting that we all take a good look at what we're focused on in life and what our life is for. Here are some ways to explore these four levels of being.
 
Physical - Look at your attachment to things
*How much focus do you have on things versus people?
*Is your life dedicated to the pursuit of more things?
 
Intellectual/Emotional - Look at how much your feelings run your life
*Notice when and how often you go to a place of powerlessness, disappointment, overwhelm, sadness, self-pity, or the like.
*What do you tell yourself when you're in that place?
*What do you do to learn from it and move beyond?
 
Creative - Focus on the Greater Good
*In what ways do you contribute to improving life on the planet?
*How do you, your life, your work, your parenting, your whatever, make a difference for others around you?
 
Spiritual - Discover your unique calling
*How do you experience the inspiration of Spirit that calls within you?
*What practices do you have in place that support you in listening for and responding to that inspiration?

 

Parting Thought

 

Remember: progress, not perfection. It's balance is what we're looking to achieve. True mastery means that you're free to live in all of these levels, experiencing all of life with joy, power, freedom and ease. That is my wish for you.

 

Upcoming Classes

 

Discover Your Love Patterns

Use the Enneagram and Spiritual Astrology to improve your love relationships. Co-lead with Farah Mihoubi.
 
Date: Thursday, January 8, 2009 from 6:30 to 8:30pm
Location: Phoenix and Dragon Bookstore, Sandy Springs
 
Solo to Soulmate
Unlock the mystery of finding True Love!

A workshop for single women who are ready to climb the Love mountain! 

 
January 2009: Weekend session, January 23, 24, 25
Location: In-home, Marietta/East Cobb
 
NOTE: Can't make this classes?
Consider hosting your own Solo to Soulmate! Hostesses get one month of free coaching! Call for details.
 
Soulmate 2: The Journey
A monthly gathering of Solo to Soulmate graduates - to continue your love learning and for support on your dating and relationship journey.
 
Meets: The second Monday of every month, 7:00 to 9:00pm, starting February 9, 2009
Location: 5825 Glenridge Drive, Sandy Springs 
 
Fast Forward Process - The Road to Gold
For entrepreneurs, small business owners, independent contractors, sales representatives. Start the New Year with a vision and plan for business success. Co-lead with Linda Zuk. 
 
Date: Friday, January 16 from 8:30am to 4:30pm
Location: Sandy Springs area
 
The Power of Personal Brand
Want more sales, a better job, a promotion, deeper relationships? Learn to use your personal brand!
 
Date: Saturday, March 14, 2009 from 10am to 1:00pm
Location: Emory Lifelong Learning Center, Briarcliff Campus
 
Date: Monday, April 27, 2009 - time TBD
Location: Emory Lifelong Learning Center, Alpharetta Campus

Upcoming Radio Shows
 
I will be appearing on two internet radio shows in January and February. Below is information on how and when to listen in. Feel free to call in!!
All shows will be recorded.
 
Exploring the Conscious Life
Tuesday, January 6 at 9:00pm Eastern
 
Knowing Angels - Valentine's Show
Monday, February 9 at 10:00pm Eastern