The Lightness of Accomplishment          

Closed eye light accomplishment mood lady

Accomplishment. Whew--big long word. It can be a heavy word too. My mind proved that point a few weeks ago. I think it could feel the end of the year coming and one afternoon, it actually went just a little crazy thinking about all that this big long word can entail. 

When we think about the word accomplishment, I think many of us have very specific ideas of what it is. It is often something we have worked a long time for. It might be something big like starting that new career or getting that new job. It might be getting a raise. It might be having a lot of money. We make these big goals for ourselves and work toward them so we can feel that sense of accomplishment. 

I can feel the heaviness setting in as I am writing. I can feel the struggle and the push that it often takes to keep us on track. I can feel the expectations that are put there about what 'proper' accomplishments are. The 'proper' ones are often the concrete things we have been told matter in life. We might have seen or been taught these expectations growing up or they might be ones we see in our everyday lives and we have automatically accepted them as true. 

That is what my mind was doing that day. It was thinking its old thoughts with no regard to my current opinion on the subject--something I can tap into when I truly reflect and refrain from going on automatic pilot. That afternoon when my mind started going, it was relentless. It started questioning my accomplishments of the year. It seemed to want a list of those big things that it has heard many others regard as accomplishments. Since I don't have such a list, my mind started dismissing all that I have done, and started looking only at what was not there in that traditional definition of accomplishment.

This is something we can see around us if we take a look. People judging their lives by what they believe they have or have not accomplished. And taking that a bit further, by what they have or do not have. They can use those old definitions of the word and feel like they have failed because they do not yet have that perfect job or that perfect house or that perfect family or as much money as they think they should have. 

The more I contemplated the subject and the word, the more my own definition of what accomplishment is came back to me. And I saw more and more clearly what I want it to feel like in my life. I started thinking about many of the clients I worked with this last year and thought about their amazing accomplishments. As is often the case, it is sometimes easier to go outside of oneself to get perspective on what feels important and inspiring to you. So I remembered specific conversations with my clients and thought about the specific issues they were dealing with. I remembered small shifts in their behavior and/or thinking.

I remembered hearing a distinct change in their voices when we were able to get away from the mind's definition of accomplishment and instead focused on the REAL sense of accomplishment whatever that was for them. We did this by getting very clear about their true values. So if family is important, they could realize that although their family might not be perfect, it IS a family, and they could begin to see all the good things of that relationship and decide on things to do that would make it even better. Or if weight loss was the issue, they could see that although there might be more weight to lose, they were taking care of their body and could be grateful for the way their legs move and carry them wherever they want to go. They could be proud that they had re-started an exercise routine that felt right for them and not focus on past attempts that might not have worked. 

Those small shifts of our thoughts--focusing on what is TRULY important to us--THAT is a feeling of accomplishment. With those shifts, the focus is on the inside instead of on those external things that are just substitutes for what we really want and desire. I remembered these many shifts in my clients and the joy, contentment and peace that they told me they experienced afterwards. I know that if I asked them, they would tell me that sometimes this small shift was one of the biggest accomplishments of the month or sometimes even the year. 

When I think about these accomplishments, they feel so light and natural. There is an authentic feeling of peace and ease that comes with them. It's like relaxing into yourself just a little more and being more connected to what is within you and what is most important to you. It has nothing to do with those outside expectations or those accomplishment definitions we took on without knowing. It is all about an authentic part of ourselves that feels more complete as a result of the accomplishment being realized.

Using my clients as inspiration, I looked at my own life this past year and made a list of my accomplishments based on MY values and using MY definition, much of which comes with how it feels inside when it is completed. And boy was my mind ever surprised! (The rest of me wasn't, it was just that little overactive mind that needed some proof.) What a list!  

So how do you define accomplishment? Are you holding on to an old definition or someone else's? If you could accomplish one thing this coming year, what would it be? Give this some thought and see what comes to you. Open yourself up to possibility and to the different shapes and sizes the accomplishment might come in. Is there a feeling you are going for? Is it a new habit or behavior? Is it a thing? What would that thing give you, do you think? Or maybe it is just one little thought that is leading you nowhere and so, you would like to change it. Oh, what an accomplishment that would be!

Whatever your answer, I encourage you to stick with the light feelings of accomplishment. If what you are thinking about feels the least bit heavy, let's just let go of that one for a while. Here we are going for accomplishment that when you think of it, it fills you with peace and energy at the same time. Maybe you haven't experienced this before. If not, what a better time is there to start than January 2011? Be curious and have some fun defining what TRUE accomplishment is for you. Happy New Year and Happy LIGHT accomplishing all year long.