Break Free Tip of the Month
From the desk of Terry Taylor, Your Recipe For Living Coach
August, 2010
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Terry Taylor
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AUGUST'S BREAK FREE TIP focuses on six steps to free you from other people's say-so and shows you how to think for yourself. I'd love to hear how these steps work for you - feel free to email me at Terry@YourRecipeForLivingCoach.com or post a comment on my Break Free Blog at www.yourrecipeforlivingcoach.com.  
Never Mind What OTHERS Think - What Do YOU Think?

Just as no one else can live your life for you, no one else can do your thinking for you.

Instead of asking for someone else's opinion, and worrying about what others are thinking or doing, tell yourself, "I can think for myself. My own careful thought - in light of the evidence and information available - will guide me in making my choices."

To let other people do your thinking is to give your mind over to those people - and thereby, your life. And this is YOUR life, remember?

It is good to gather all the information from others that you can - but then you must make your own evaluations, revisions and decisions.
Here's How To Get Started
       
  1. Find out what you need to know. When you don't know what to think about something, ask yourself what else you need to know in order to make a wise decision.

 

  1. Start gathering more information and evidence. When you are confused about an issue, it just means you don't have enough evidence or information to make a wise choice or come to a solid conclusion. You can obtain the information you need and then evaluate it in the light of what you already know. Things will start to make sense to you, and your confusion will clear up.

 

  1. Don't be afraid of making a mistake. You can't know everything there is to know when you need to make a decision - you can only make choices and draw conclusions based on the information and evidence available to you at any one time. Your mistakes lead to new information and evidence. Thomas Edison's legendary 1,000 mistakes taught him how to make a light bulb!

 

  1. Don't be afraid of new information. New information and evidence can either confirm or expand your knowledge.  For example, you might learn that water boils at 212 degrees Fahrenheit in your kitchen. Later on you go camping in the mountains and you find that the water boils at a lower temperature. That new information does not mean that water doesn't still boil at 212 degrees...it means that the boiling point of water depends on the pressure of the atmosphere in your location. Your previous knowledge was not wrong - it was just incomplete, and you have expanded your understanding of the behavior of water! The beauty is that you can apply this process to everything in the world, including human relationships. (Some women even claim to know the boiling point of their husbands under varying degrees of pressure!)
     
  2. Don't panic if you have to make a decision in a hurry. Use your best judgment based on the information and evidence available to you at the time. That's what everyone else must do, and you know yourself better than anyone else does.

  3. Don't be afraid of thinking for yourself. If you use your best judgment based on all the evidence and information available to you at the time, you do yourself proud. That is all that anyone can do, and you are the one most qualified to know what's best for you!
 

During the entire month of August, practice thinking things out for yourself before seeking other people's opinions; then ask how they arrived at their opinions and share how you arrived at yours. You will start to enjoy your own mind, build greater self-confidence, and gain control of your life. On top of that, you will increase your respect for yourself and become a far more interesting person to yourself and others.
Always here to make your days more delicious,
 
Terry
 
Terry Jean Taylor
Your Recipe For Living Coach, LLC
Your Recipfe For Living Coach, LLC logo 
A passionate motivational speaker and life coach with a new reality-based, no-nonsense approach, Terry Taylor is the designer of a unique strategy for reaching your goals and loving your life. A personal counselor for over thirty years, Terry has helped women in all walks of life break free from the contradictions in their beliefs that lead to conflict, confusion, and guilt.  Her CD program - 8 Steps For Reclaiming Your Life From Conflict, Confusion And The Control Of Others - is available at her website www.yourrecipeforlivingcoach.com, where you can also learn about her upcoming book, This Is Your Life: No Apology Needed.
 
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