Be honest: Do you often end up doing things that you've asked your children to do, because it's
just easier to do them yourself?

If so, you are not alone. Many parents feel it's exhausting getting their kids to do chores. But, having our children take on duties is not only for the purpose of lightening our load. Requiring children to help around the house teaches them that not everything is done for them and that pitching in is a key element of being part of a family; it also prepares them for tasks they will one day have to do on their own.

You should start your children at a very young age with simple chores such as picking up their toys and helping to set and clear the table. Older children can be responsible for feeding a pet, sweeping, sorting laundry, and keeping their rooms neat.

Here are some things to keep in mind:

* Don't load on too many tasks.

* Avoid giving your children chores that you don't really care about, or "busy work."

* Don't criticize.

* Use positive motivation to get the job done: "You did a great job putting those puzzles on the shelf! As soon as you put away the books, too, we can play a game together."

If you need to impose a consequence for a job not done, it should be logical and connected as much as possible to the chore. For example: "You know the rule -- we have to clean up from one activity before we begin the next. Now you have to put away your toys first before we can play your game."   The generic consequence is that the child will able to go onto the next enjoyable activity as soon as she completes the chore.

And, make sure you praise a chore done well. "Thanks so much for putting away the groceries. You're a big help to me." Consistently give your children positive feedback for their contributions, and they will continue to cooperate. And, you will have planted the seeds that will help your children grow into responsible, cooperative family members and adults.