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Greetings!
Do you know that most of us are motivated by punishment or reward in life?
Makes sense right? Most of us were trained by our parents to behave or to achieve and the practices employed were often "don't do that, or else" or "do this and I'll give you something you want."
What do you think that does to our inner guidance and our organic desires?
Last weekend I took an excellent workshop with Miki Kashtan, co-founder of Bay Area Nonviolent Communication, on "Choice in the Face of Demands" and have related some of the material to why I see so many people rebelling against Love.
In this newsletter find out why this punishment/reward system has created a culture of reactionary rebels who not only have a hard time receiving love but often will say "no" to love when they really mean "yes" and what it takes to come from a place of freedom so you can be present to the love in front of you!
All my love,
Bella
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UP COMING EVENTS
MANIFESTING YOUR BELOVED ORIENTATIONS
(Please click on the link to register) All classes are FRE*E but require registration as space is limited
LIVE, THIS THURSDAY at INNER JOURNEYS in LOS GATOS
FEBRUARY 26, 2009 at 7 PM
I'm pretty busy these days but do my best to make a physical appearance once a month. If you're in Northern California, you don't want to miss the ability to experience the workshop live. It's always such a beautiful revelation. THIS CLASS SOLD OUT last time we did it!
TELE-CLASS MARCH 12, 2009 at 7pm
LIVE at GATEWAYS BOOKSTORE in SANTA CRUZ
MARCH 31, 2009
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Do You Rebel Against Love?
And how would you know? Here's one way to find out. Think back and ask yourself have you ever said "No", when you really meant "yes", simply because you felt like you didn't want to give the person in front of you satisfaction of either being right, or having seemingly more power than you, of telling you what to do?
I'll give you an example. You really want to go for a walk and your partner asks you if you'd like to go, but then says something like, "I know this will be good for you, since you haven't been getting out much." I, for one, in the past would have felt rubbed the wrong way. My first reaction would have been, "Don't tell me what I need!" It's taken time to understand why my hackles would raise and to perceive instead the genuine desire for my well-being that my partner may want for me, to receive his love.
As children we weren't given much autonomy in this culture. If you had parents who you perceived as remotely "controlling", you'll find that demands were constantly being made of you rather than requests, and the concept of choice may have been a moot point.
As a result, the only choices we often could exercise were either to rebel (fight) or submit (flight). How does this manifest in our adult relationships? We can perceive requests and invitations as demands and we automatically fall back to our old reactions and miss the love that wants to be expressed. We can also submit when our partners are seeming more powerful and confident than us and not allow ourselves the spaciousness to exercise our right to choose something different.
At the crux of this is the desire for freedom which is our true nature as Spiritual Beings. So how can you keep yourself from rebelling against the good that wants to come into your life?
Take a step back and separate anything that sounds like a demand from the need that is being expressed behind it.
Going back to the example of taking a walk, if I listened to my partner and perceived his statement as a suggestion rather than a demand, I can instantly see his need to be helpful and supportive of me in our relationship.
And how beautiful is that?
To find out more about why we block our Beloved and how to start receiving the love you deserve, attend one of our free Orientations or come and attend the Manifesting Your Beloved 2 Day Intensive coming April 4 & 5, 2009 to Marin!
All my love,
Bella
Bella
Shing is a Spiritual Love Coach who helps people who believe in the Law
of Attraction to Manifest their Beloveds by understanding first and
foremost how to be that for themselves.
She
publishes the monthly "Beloved Training" Ezine where you'll get Tips,
Resources, and Inspiration on how to be the Beloved all the time. Get
your Free subscription at: www.manifestingyourbeloved.com
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email us at: bella@manifestingyourbeloved.com
phone: 831-427-3490
visit us on the web at: www.manifestingyourbeloved.com
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SUGGESTED TELE-CLASS
Want to learn about a method that can help you become your own healer, to know what is blocking you from having the love you want?
Then you'll won't want to miss Shakti Wilson's Tele-class. Many of you wanted to be on the call that we had with her last year and it turns out she's having a FR*EE TELE-CLASS FEBRUARY 26, 2009 at 7:30 PM PST. CLICK HERE TO LET HER KNOW you want in!
Tell her that Bella sent ya!
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