I originally wrote this in 2004 and so many amazing things and memories from wonderful people came from its publishing.  However, it seems like lately, this story and the family members involved have been in my thoughts a lot more than normal...so I thought I'd offer it to you again...

          Thanksgiving has always been a hard day for my Mom.  Yes, you would think that it should be the "day of thanks" and that everyone should celebrate.  However, this is a different story, and it's something I've wanted to write for years.  On that day in 1963, my Uncle George, Aunt Grace and three cousins, Lisa, Ellen & Mac were coming to have dinner and spend a few days with us.  Uncle George was a pharmacist in Lawrenceburg, owned the Rexall drug store on the square, and had just bought his own Beechcraft airplane, so they were going to fly to be with us in Knoxville.   If you have roots in Lawrenceburg, then you might remember them as the Finley family, and my mother as Ethel Hagan Caldwell.   

When I broke my leg earlier that summer, Aunt Grace spoiled me rotten.  I got presents from Uncle George's drug store in the mail on a regular basis. Since Mac was a few years older than me, his "hand-me-downs" always came my way too, but it was cool, because they were Mac's & he and I were buddies.  Needless to say, their arrival was the highlight of the week.   Me being five and my brother David almost three, my actual memories are sketchy at best.  I think I remember going to the airport with Dad to wait for them, but again, I'm not sure. 

          I remember Mom being at first impatient as they weren't there, and later being extremely emotional.  No one will ever know what actually happened, but the plane crashed somewhere around Crossville and the entire family was killed.  Dad had to identify the bodies.  Even though it was Mom's sister and her family, back then the husband was the only one they would allow.  He's never talked about it, and he probably cried as much as anyone.  David and I didn't go to the funeral.  We stayed with our other grandparents, who lived in Oak Ridge.  Mom pretty much had to be the rock for her family as her parents, who lived less than a block away from Uncle George & Aunt Grace, were in absolute shock.    

           My first thoughts of what God was like came from that time.  If you remember your history, the Thursday before, JFK was shot in Dallas.  My childlike thoughts were of Mac and President Kennedy sitting on a hay bale (think manger) talking to each other, waiting to meet God...kind of like I waited in the doctor's office with Mom.  I thought "How cool...Mac got to meet the President...and God too!  I can't wait to talk to him about it!" 

          Mom told me years later about the funeral.  The entire town shut down.  Businesses closed, and everyone was in mourning.  They didn't have backhoes like they do today.  The gravediggers had to dig five side by side and it took almost the entire night.  She said she counted almost 80 arrangements at the graveside and a cold front came through the night of the funeral, freezing all of the flowers.  The imagery of that still affects me. 

          One of my last memories of Granddaddy was that Christmas.  Aunt Grace & Uncle George had gifts for me & David.  Knowing Aunt Grace like I did, she probably had already bought it before their death.  As I was opening it, he just sat there in his chair and cried.  He died the following April from heart problems...actually, he died from a "broken heart attack".  The graves are at the front of the cemetery and you can see them from the road as you drive by.  Their neighbors' son, Jim Parkes Jr., told me that he would sit across the street from the cemetery in his car and cry for hours.  He probably didn't have the emotional strength to go to the gravesite.  Just like my thoughts about Mac, "I can't wait to talk to him about it." 

There are several thoughts that could lead into my monthly rant about life insurance, estate planning, etc.  However, I'm not going there.  I think of my cousins often...wondering what my life would be like with them in it.  Mom reminds me that I'm a lot like her father, and I wear that like a badge of honor.  I have his cufflinks and wear them almost daily.  Mac's bible is on a shelf at home in front our Granddaddy's picture...where it belongs.  That's me in Granddaddy's arms by the way...I can still smell his Old Spice after shave...

          Our lives are so blessed with friends and family who are still alive and well.  Some of my close friends are not so well this Thanksgiving, and just as I think often of my family members who are in Heaven, I will pray often for my friends that are still with us.   On this Thanksgiving, let's be grateful for all that we have that we may take for granted.  You never know what tomorrow may bring...and regardless of whom life may take from us; let's look forward to that day when we "can't wait to talk to them about it".

Happy Thanksgiving,

Brian

PS: I love you, Mom!

Brian_Carden@PeachtreePlanning.com

www.briancarden.com