How are you today? It's Friday! Long 3 day weekend coming up so fast you can taste it. Happy Fourth to you.
Did you learn anything new this week? I bet you learned a ton of stuff.
At WWAD, we aim to promote a healthy environment of learning at our World HQ. We are constantly having seminars, webinars, fly-ins, fly-bys, and Sponge Bob Square Pants Marathons (once my staff explains the clever subtext of what is actually transpiring on screen? It's mind blowing!).
This week we have focused on Imitation is the Sincerest Form of Flattery. Unfortunately, there is a reason for that.
Debuting on March 26, 2011 was Just Pee, A Pee With a Doc Program. This is the 'brainchild' of a nine (9) person urology group in SW Nebraska (SWNU).
I know what you're thinking, this is another one of David's "jokes". Another opportunity for him to giggle and snort. Wouldn't it be nice if that were the case.
At first we thought SWNU was just having fun with us. You know, poke the cardiologist. Then, all the signals were pointing to this being very real; they were here to stay. Still, I'd laugh it off, "They can't keep this up", I said. Wrong again.
Over 3 months into it, Kathryn is still getting calls regarding where they meet, can guests bring their dog, can't find it on the website, etc.
Simply put, the confusion between the two programs has become an issue.
While we are indeed "flattered", unfortunately, we have to discuss this, in the largest public forum we have access to.
While there are similarities between WWAD & PWAD, there are many differences.
First, and the one that really gets under my skin. All of their marketing materials read,
Just Pee, A Pee with a Doc Program, We're # 1. This is, without a doubt, confusing. To me it connotes that they are the #1, or best program. When all they truly have done is found a loophole.
They mean "We're #1" as in (pee = #1 and the other stuff = #2). Albeit creative, they are merely taking advantage of what they focus on. I'm sorry, but after we have spent six and half years delicately crafting the infrastructure of WWAD, we cannot help but take offense to this upstart's false claim. We think we are #1 (we certainly don't want to be #2...if you know what I mean - heeheehee).
("Wow Nancy. You can tell David went 3 whole weeks without talking about the dirty stuff, because he's letting it fly this morning!")
As I mentioned, there are many similarities, and there are many differences.
Most of our chapters meet on Saturday mornings, they do the same.
While we encourage # of steps taken and often tally them; they encourage # of liters purged (e.g. Highbanks took 245,000 steps Saturday; SW Nebraska released 57.4 liters).
Our WWAD Reconnaissance Squadron (WWADRS) has revealed this to be nothing more than a marketing ploy. SWNU wants to say, "Hey come see OUR docs. They're special because their patients do #1 tthhhhis much (spread arms wide)!!"
Give me a break.
They have a urologist speak on the latest urology trials; we aim to be more broad ranged and will address the important news from any specialty, including urology.
We hand out free pedometers that allow us to stay honest, shooting for 10,000 steps or more a day; they hand out urinals with places for check-marks to tally number of uses. That's gross.
We have our medical students, RNs, and doctors check blood pressures; they do private bladder scans to test the degree of urinary retention. This is quite honestly inappropriate for the park setting ("and newsletters for that matter, David").
Our shirts have been red, white, blue (USA!), pink, and tan; theirs are, well you can guess what color theirs are.
While we encourage our team to get a decent night's rest (at least 7 hours); they encourage significant Friday evening water consumption and quietly advocate avoidance of the "facilities" until arrival in the park, when it's "official". They are obviously doing this to pad their numbers, and you know what, it's not healthy.
Our bylaws do not mandate any specifics to meeting locales; they must have an audible source of water and multiple private restrooms adjacent to their gathering place.
While we welcome and celebrate all holidays; they choose only one.
St. Patrick's Day (you may want to cover your ears, this is where it is hard to listen to). This is what they do instead of green beer.
On March 16th, they have a special late night gathering (dubbed Midnight Blues) where they hand out blue Popsicles. This way, when their participants come to the park in the a.m. they all dance around and pee gr...well, you get it. Is that not horrible? Can you now see why they've forced our hand?
To our skeptics, yes there is plenty of room in the sandbox ("you mean litterbox?"). While commonplace among urologists, we do not condone this excessive discussion surrounding urination. But most importantly, at the end of the day, it's not healthy. It's stupid and it's pointless ("like the start of this newsletter Dr. Dave?")