Holding Onto A Relationship?
What a week, and still days to go.
We are grappling with the issue of, 'When is the right time to put down our ill dog?' He has been with us 16 years, raised along with our three kids; weathered fire evacuation; wind storms; and been my constant companion and protector in our daily walks by the dam.
And earlier this week, our eldest son came over and had an accident. A window crashed down on his hand resulting in a broken finger. Walt and I both struggled to lift the window off his hand, but it wouldn't budge. Terrifying experience. When it finally opened, we ended up rushing to emergency.
Today I learned one of the girls I'm closest to in the non-profit program I volunteer with (Helping young high-risk pregnant teens learn how to write), has been kicked out of school. Worse, her baby has been taken away from her by authorities.
This whole week reminds me of the importance of letting go, and not holding onto anyone or anything. When we try to hold on to relationships, life happens.
People move away voluntarily or involuntarily, especially our children. Others either disappoint us, or they move on through illness, another relationship, or death. The harder we try to protect them and keep them close to us, accidents happen, or other types of hardships occur. But even good things separate us from them like a child's acceptance to college, or their marriage. Perhaps our best friend gets a job out of state.
People or animals don't really make us happy. We make our own selves happy. Happiness is within. People and pets simply magnify what we feel about ourselves. Not understanding this, some people are needy, and clingy in relationships. They are hoping the other person never leaves them. However, that clingy state, makes them unattractive, so the other person moves away emotionally and/or physically, because they also feel suffocated.
We can't hold onto relationships. They are not ours to begin with. People are not given to us. The universe simply loans these souls to us, and all relationships, like everything else, changes.
And, when we cling and clutch onto someone whether it's a person or a pet, we suffer, which is what Buddha taught. And like Jesus, and other spiritual masters, they also taught us to just love others and allow them to be who they are. Allow them their journey either good or bad. We can't stop their hurt and pain. We can only be there for them in love.
Love, Light and Blessings,
Janet
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Walter H. Jackson and Janet Alston Jackson are personal
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