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Ask Gandalf
Q&A With a Wise Old Bird
Howdy Fans, here I am again to answer your most heartfelt and intimate questions.
Dear Gandalf, I am one of the privileged birds who happens to be an Amazon. Now during the last world census isn't it a fact that there were more Amazons than any other bird on the planet?
I think it's the truth; there are more of us than any other bird.
Signed, the Amazing Amazon
Dear AA, I am not sure where you get your figures from but according to my records the highest in numbers among birds is your close relative ...... the chicken. Well at least in my books it's a close relative to you.
Dearest Gandalf, I just love to pluck my feathers. One reason is it drives my human crazy. She gets so upset and begs me to stop. Silly lady, doesn't she know that's why I do it. However, I'm getting kind of cold so should I stop or keep doing it?
Love, Bare-naked Ladybird
Dear BL, I really like the sleek look of the bare skin. I have been known to pluck some myself. Sometimes I do it for the same reason you do.... just to hear my humans get upset. Other times it's because my skin itches, especially this time of year. So I take baths then and it helps a little. Then my human tries to spray some gook on me to help the itching but I run away as fast and far as I can get. They are so much fun to confuse! Keep up the good work!
Ok, this is all the information I'm going to give out this time. For more exciting news tune in next month for more exciting razzle-dazzlement, and keep those questions coming. In the meantime just remember by favorite saving, AAAAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Send your questions to wiseoldbird@yahoo.com so I can amaze you with my answers.
Gandalf
The opinions expressed in this column are not necessarily those of this company, not necessarily those of the editor, and probably not necessary.
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