Dear Harlan,

I'm in a new relationship and don't want to do the wrong thing. When is the right time to have sex in a committed relationship?

 

Not Quite Undressed

 

 

Dear Not Quite Undressed,

Long enough that you know someone loves being with you and doesn't just love having sex with you. Long enough to know if someone is going to give you a sexual souvenir (herpes, chlamydia, etc.). Long enough to discuss what would happen if someone got pregnant (assuming a woman is involved). Long enough to be able to discuss what turns each person on and off. Long enough to know that neither partner feels pressured to have sex. There are couples who have sex on a first date and spend the rest of their lives together, and couples who wait for their wedding day. If waiting causes a breakup, it's safe to say it would have been too soon to have sex. As for the right time, noon works.

 

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