Dear Harlan,

My boyfriend and I have been dating for more than three years. We were planning on going to college together, but he was waitlisted. I sent in my deposit, and now he's acting resentful and passive-aggressive. He is insecure about what will happen to us next year. His behavior is starting to bother me. I decided I wanted to take a break and think about us. I then visited my future school and had an amazing time (and danced with a really cute guy, whom I cannot wait to see next year). The fact that I have this huge crush on this guy (and had trouble sleeping that night because of him) makes me think my boyfriend and I would be better off not together in college. I know breaking up with him will crush him. He says I'm his whole life. That is another thing that makes me uncomfortable. I'm not sure how I feel about him, at this point. I care about him a lot, but maybe the time has come for us to be more independent and go our separate ways.

Graduating with Doubts

Dear Graduating,

You know exactly how you feel. When you like a guy, his unyielding love for you is comforting. When you're pushing yourself away and thinking about other guys you want to date, that same love becomes obnoxious and annoying. He senses it. That's probably why he's being resentful. What happens next is that you either cheat, lie or hurt him by telling him the truth. He might hate you for telling the truth, but at least he can respect you. This way, if you find that you miss dancing with your boyfriend next year, at least you won't have to undo all the terrible things you've done. Continue being honest. Let him know what you're feeling, and see where this takes you. You definitely know how you feel - you're just afraid of hurting him.