Dear Harlan,

I am transferring to the University of South Florida from a community college. My mother is EXTREMELY overprotective of me due to my visual impairment. I am not able to drive (although I will be able to use the campus bus system), and I will be living on campus. My question is about college life. I'm shy and am planning on getting my own room. I am not a drinker or a partier, and I'm not very social. I'm having doubts about whether I can live life on my own.

Seeds of Doubt

 

Dear Seeds of Doubt,

It's not exactly a boost to your self-confidence when the person who loves you most is having doubts. And this is where I'd start. Ask your mom what specifically concerns her. Is it because you're her baby and she's always taken care of you? Is it because she thinks you won't be able to take care of yourself? Is it because she doesn't have faith in the campus resources? Make a list of her concerns. When it comes to your own self-doubts, make a list of what specifically worries you. Once you have a list, reach out to the people on campus who can answer your questions. Start with the office for students with disabilities. Talk to the director or assistant director and share your concerns. See if you can get introduced to other students with similar challenges who have made the transition. Have your mom reach out to parent resources. Know what kind of emotional, academic and peer support is available. You might be shocked by what you discover. Only then can you decide if living at USF is the real problem and not just your mom's fears.

 

 

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