Dear Harlan,

I have been with my boyfriend for three years now. He is older and has a daughter. We live together. We are not in the best financial situation, but we are stable. He hasn't asked me to marry him yet, although we have touched on the subject. Why do you think he hasn't asked? Do you think it would be weird for me to ask him?

Waiting 

Dear Waiting,

Why would he want to marry you right now? He's getting all the benefits without having all the responsibilities. If you were him, had a daughter you were supporting and finances were tight, would you want to get married? Would you want the expense of a ring, a wedding and caring for another person? Would you want to have to deal with bringing a new family member into the mix? The last thing he might want at this point in his life is more responsibility and a complicated situation with his ex and daughter. But let's forget him for a second. Don't you want him to be in a better place financially and emotionally before getting married? Once you're married, his financial issues become yours. And if you get married, and get pregnant, you're looking at him being financially and emotionally invested for life. So, instead of focusing on why he hasn't asked you to get married, make sure it's the right time to get married. Want to know the weirdest part of this question? You live together and feel like it would be weird to talk about marriage. Once you live together, you can talk about anything and it's not weird. I'd spend less time guessing what he thinks and more time thinking and talking about what you want.