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Greetings!
We hope you enjoy this new eNewsletter! Each month this newsletter will include insightful articles, inspirational affirmations, and valuable tips to enhance the quality of your life.  Best wishes, K. Kiomi Mount, LICSW, DCSW CounselingForSuccess.com |
Inspirational Quote
Excellence is not a
singular act, but a habit.
You are what you repeatedly do.
~Shaquille
O'Neal |
What's New
Introducing a new counselor
I am excited to introduce
a new counselor, Eliza Carlson, to Counseling for Success. Her philosophy of food as medicine and of the mind as a
powerful healer makes her a joy to work with.
Eliza Sage Carlson , MS, CN
Eliza
Carlson is dually qualified as a certified nutritionist and master's level
counselor. She enjoys helping people find balance and
increase vitality. Ms. Carlson's specialties include weight
management and food allergies. She also offers clients a natural, holistic
approach to managing diabetes, heart disease and cholesterol. Read more...
Ask a therapist for FREE
Do you have a concern
about your relationship, work, or health?
Submit your question to the Counselor Q&A. All questions are confidential
and anonymous. We answer up to three
questions a month. To find out more or to submit a question click here.
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Counselor Q&A
Q. I feel
lost and lonely. Even though I am
married and have two healthy children, there is a strange void I don't
know how to fill. My wife is good
to me but we have the normal stressors of life. I feel like I am constantly going,
going, going and not enjoying my life. I think if I do more I'll be happier, but
I end up feeling like a machine, going through the motions and still
unsatisfied at the end of the day.
- Sam, age 53
A. The
emotional void you feel comes from being too outwardly focused.
Lasting happiness won't be found in doing more, you have to BE more. Be
more present, be more grateful, be more lighthearted. A Harvard
study on healthy aging reports people who were the most happy and healthy
had rediscovered the art of playfulness as adults.  Adopt the mindset
of a child. Children are experts at Being. They have no goals, no
plans, no have to's. They experience joy in the moment. You can
still be the goal oriented adult 80% of the day, but change your attitude
the remaining 20%. Make life a game rather than a pressure to
achieve. Live in more in the moment, rather than worrying about the future
or dwelling on the past.
Q. I have
been in a relationship for about eight months now. My partner and I seem compatible in
almost every area except the bedroom.
Our sexual appetites are completely different and I'm not sure how important
I should make this. I've tried all
kinds of techniques and suggested different ideas to awaken his desires
and stimulate his mind. Nothing does the trick. He is the most wonderful companion in
every other way. Perhaps I'm
placing too much emphasis on sex and I should just be grateful having him
in my life. But I'm so frustrated!!
- Marie, age 40
A. If the
other aspects of the relationship make up for the lack of sexual
compatibility, then appreciate him for who he is, not who you want him to
be. If you have not communicated
clearly what your needs are, talk with him this week! You are not being fair to him by
speaking in vague generalities. If none
of this works and you realize sexual fulfillment is required for you to be
happy, move on.
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Interviewing with confidence
Interview experts
tell us the most successful interviews result from candidates who demonstrate
energy and excitement about former positions and fit the needs of the position
they are interviewing for.
Our Top 5 Tips to Interviewing with Confidence are:
1. Be
prepared. Fear of the unknown can increase stress and worry. Avoid this by preparing yourself. Practice interview questions. Check out
sample questions on the internet.
Research the company online.
Talk with people who work at the company or somewhere
similar. The more prepared you are,
the more confident you will feel.
2. Think positive. Remind
yourself of your strengths and why you are such a desirable employee. Pump
yourself up by listening to inspirational music. SMILE. Emotions are
contagious. If you feel good and
confident, your interviewers will feel good and confident about you.
3. Breathe. Take
slow deep breaths before and during the interview. You will talk slower and appear more
composed.
4. Ask
and Assess. Ask your interviewer
what job skill or personal trait he/she has found hardest to find in new
employees. Assess how you meet those requirements and
share your assessment with the interviewer.
5. Let
go of the outcome. Don't worry
about whether you'll get the job.
Worrying only drains your energy and prevents you from exuding
excitement and confidence. Trust
you will get the right job. If you
don't get this one, an even better job offer will come to you.
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Dealing with financial uncertainty
Times are tough for millions of people. Some people are waiting for circumstances to
change in order to feel better. But did
you know you can actually feel better despite
the circumstances? You can find peace
within the storm.
Although we have limited control over our external world, we
have complete control over our internal world, our thoughts and feelings. Take one minute now. Close your eyes and listen to that little
voice inside your head. What is it
saying? Is it words of encouragement or discouragement? What we say to ourselves has a profound
effect on how we feel. The more negative
the self-talk, the more hopeless, discouraged, and scared we feel. This creates a negative spiral that includes
decreased motivation and difficulty concentrating, potentially leading to
behaviors such as increased drinking, overeating or social isolation. These behaviors can worsen our circumstances.
On the other hand, the more encouraging, reassuring words we
say to ourselves, the more calm and comforted we feel. We are more energized, creative, and
soci al. We are better able to problem
solve and do things to improve our circumstances.
Feeling better about financial limitations and uncertainty
starts within you. Be aware and mindful
of your inner dialogue. Keep negative
thoughts at bay. Say reassuring things
to yourself such as, "Things will get better. I will be ok. I can handle this."
Make sure what you say is believable so you really FEEL a change within.
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Laughter is good medicine
A joke a day keeps
the doctor away.
Share a joke, others need comic relief too!
Borrow money from
pessimists, they don't expect it back.
What is the fruitiest lesson?
History, because it's full of dates!
Why did the lazy man want a job in a bakery?
So he could loaf around!
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Affirmation of the Month
I let go of resisting
my circumstances because what I resist persists. I let life flow like a river, running
freely. I trust I am being carried to a
deeper, stronger place, like the clear blue ocean. A place of depth, serenity, and fullness.
I let go of focusing
on what I don't have and give thanks for all I do have. Everything has a place
and purpose. As I open myself up to the
lessons to be learned, I feel more free, I feel more confident.
I am capable. I am strong. I am patient and know all will be revealed and
resolved at the right time.
I go forth this day in
faith, with an open heart and mind.
- Kiomi Mount
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