First of all, we hope everybody is having a good week. We did not win any Academy Awards this year, SNUBBED AGAIN! but congratulations to anybody on this email who may have. Here's our brief take on this year's yawn-fest in a segment we'd like to call...
BEARFIGHT DOES THE OSCARS AND
DOES 'EM REAL GOOD
DID YOU KNOW that the girl who played The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo in The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo is the same chick who played Mark Zuckerberg's cute preppy ex gf in the Social Network? We were floored by this. What a difference shaving off your eyebrows makes in terms of how enjoyable it is to see you naked for the whole movie. Bet she wishes she stayed with the annoying Harvard billionaire rather than getting blankety blanked by that blankety blank blanking shrink guy.
DID YOU KNOW that of the top 10 highest grossing movies of '11, nine were sequels? Thus, the logic is, if you make a new movie, just pretend it's a sequel. For example, if your movie is called "BearFight" just name it "BearFight 2: BearFought", and it will kill at the box office. Additionally, you will have the added bonus of getting all hipster by walking around saying "the original was way better" and letting people contradict you at their own peril.
NOW FOR SOME THUMBS UPS AND
THUMBS DOWNS
DOWN - Only six super hero movies in 2011? We can only do 6? Dig deep, Hollywood. Get into those weird comics that only super nerds know about. Wait we already did that? Nevermind.
UP - The Expendables. Hooooo-doggy what a thrill ride. We don't know when it was actually released but Chris watched it roughly a half hour before writing this email and had to stop every 3-4 minutes to do a barrel roll and save a Mexican chick. The people at Quizno's kept asking him to leave but "NOT WITHOUT THE GIRL," he insisted.
DOWN - The Artist won Best Picture. First of all, it's in French. Second of all, it's silent and yes that negates the first part but don't change the subject. Haven't we pretty much proven that movies with sound are better than movies without? That's like a horse and buggy winning Motortrend's Car of the Year. Ya know what silent movie was better? The Expendables on mute when the pizza place called back to make sure that's the right address.
DOWN - Up. Did not care for that movie. It insists upon itself.
UP - Hey remember when we announced in 2009 that t-shirts were coming in early spring? Yeah well, we dropped the ball there. BUT they're ready now and here's a sneak peek. (Note: the design on ours differs slightly in that it looks absolutely nothing like that but the shirts are that same color of black, so that should give you an idea of what you're getting.) Pre-order yours today.
DOWN - The Muppets Movie didn't get nominated for Best Picture. This movie invented fart shoes. And you're not going to nominate it. Seriously.
UP - Up up down down left right left right B A B A (select) start.
Anyway, come to Lansdowne Saturday night to watch us sing and plug more upcoming Landsowne shows like SAINT PATRICK'S DAY WHAAAAT?!?
