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| ABC(D) Model
A = Adversity
(What is the difficult situation you're faced with?)
B = Belief
(What do you initially believe to be true about it?)
C = Consequence
(What is the consequence of that belief?)
D = Disputation
(After thinking through it rationally, what do you know to be true - how can you reframe your thoughts?)
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"For myself I am an optimist - it does not seem to be much use being anything else."
-- Winston Churchill |
"People often say that motivation doesn't last. Well, neither does bathing - that's why we recommend it daily."
-- Zig Ziglar
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| Greetings!
Last month we talked about how you can learn to be more optimistic with Martin Seligman's ABC model (see sidebar for a refresher). This month, we'll look at how you can maintain that newfound optimism long term.
You're receiving this newsletter because you are a valued client, or have been referred by a friend or colleague. Please visit my website, read my newsletter, forward it to your friends and associates, and let me know what you think. I truly appreciate your support and I wish you all the best!
Kathy
KathyLight Leadership
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Learning to Look on the Bright Side - Part II
 How do you maintain your optimism? Over the years I've used many different methods, and I've learned many from my clients as well. I've had the opportunity in the past few months to speak to two different groups about "Learning to Look on the Bright Side". Here are some of the ideas my audiences came up with:
- Keep practicing the ABC(D) model!
- Watch what you say about yourself, because we tend to believe what we say. If someone asks you how you're doing, don't say "I'm tired" or "I'm okay"; say "I'm great!". Or as a former co-worker of mine used to say, "Fantastic! Best day of my life!" Before you know it, you'll start believing it.
- Avoid pessimistic words and phrases like "never", "always", "just can't", and "just won't ever".
- Be careful about what you see and hear. Instead of listening to gossip or negative talk radio, or watching the bad news, why not listen to uplifting music or a motivational speaker, or read a few pages of a great book?
- Focus on the things you can control. Getting sucked into negative news stories and predictions of doom and gloom isn't going to help you, and worrying about things you can't control is one sure way to feel depressed. Instead, try focusing on the things you can control (like your self-talk), and on all the good news that is out there. If you have trouble finding good news, log on to www.goodnewsnetwork.net, where all the news is good!
- Start your day with an expression or prayer of gratitude, a positive affirmation, or a great quote.
- Do something nice for someone else. An easy and free way to do this every day is by logging on to www.thehungersite.com. One simple click gives a free cup of food to a hungry person.
- Get out and take a walk when you feel yourself getting sucked into negative thinking. A change of environment often leads to a change of perspective.
- Hire a coach or work with an optimism partner to keep you on track and help you reframe your thinking on a regular basis.
- Read "The Optimist's Creed" at least once a week:
Promise Yourself:
- To be so strong that nothing can disturb your peace of mind.
- To talk health, happiness, and prosperity to every person you meet.
- To make all of your friends feel that there is something worthwhile in them.
- To look at the sunny side of everything and make your optimism come true.
- To think only of the best, to work only for the best and to expect only the best.
- To be just as enthusiastic about the success of others as you are about your own.
- To forget the mistakes of the past and press on to the greater achievements of the future.
- To wear a cheerful expression at all times and give a smile to every living creature you meet.
- To give so much time to improving yourself that you have no time to criticize others.
- To be too large for worry, too noble for anger, too strong for fear, and too happy to permit the presence of trouble.
- To think well of yourself and to proclaim this fact to the world, not in a loud word, but in great deeds.
- To live in the faith that the whole world is on your side, so long as you are true to the best that is in you.
(Source: Your Forces and How to Use Them by Christian D. Larson)
Just like anything else, learning to be optimistic takes practice -- but the more you do it, the more you train your brain to think that way automatically, and the easier it becomes.
I wish you all the best, and thanks for reading!
~ Kathy
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