Are you in the habit of breathing? I'm referring to the slow, deep breathing that allows us to connect with what is really going on in the moment, in order to become aware of the opportunity that lies within it. That kind of breathing. I was reminded of this recently, to breathe deeper than I had been. Sometimes it gets so busy that while we're obviously breathing for survival, we're not truly breathing at all. It became clear to me that I needed to breathe those slow deep breaths (versus the short choppy ones), those fortifying and nurturing breaths that send the oxygen deep into our cells so that we feel better, look better, and ultimately live better.

Remember the saying count to ten?

As women, if we can make the choice to take those moments in our day to breathe, especially in those difficult times when parenting, we allow ourselves to feel the discomfort that sometimes comes along with it. Then, behind that,  comes ownership of the discomfort which then leads to acceptance and release. True release.  The kind that doesn't hang out in our bodies and then manifest itself physically in order to get noticed.

This is true emotional awareness.

By giving ourselves permission to express ourselves in this way; breathing and connecting to the present moment, we come to learn more about who we really are and what it is we truly want. When we don't give expression to our feelings, they're still inside of us, taking space in our bodies, waiting for identification.

When I work with children in the area of emotional awareness, at times I guide them to breathe deeply into their discomfort by taking those three deep breaths in through the nose and out through the mouth in order to slow down and figure out what it is they are experiencing.  When they can name it, they can claim it. Anger sometimes shows itself initially, and also irritation as a result of connecting to the body,which is not always a comfortable feeling. Ultimately, underneath, though, there maybe sadness and grief. This is typically the layer under the emotion of anger. Once this sadness can be revealed, (in the form of not fitting in, not feeling good enough, etc.) it can be released.

Acceptance equals moving to a position of power.

The next time we are frustrated with our children's behaviors, for example, consider reminding yourself to stop, breathe three long deep and slow breaths and ask yourself in that precious pause, what do I  really need to do here?  Do you need to discipline? You might. Do you need to surrender and trust in the choices your kids are making? Maybe.  The truth for each one of us is buried deep in that moment. By breathing, consciously breathing, we can find that buried treasure of truth that is available to each one of us.