GaGa Sisterhood
October 2009
GaGazine Contents
2009/2010 Calendar
November 1 Meeting
The Art of Grandparenting
Guest Writers Wanted
Forward this Newsletter to a Friend
Making Sense of Long Distance Grandparenting
Book Signing at Atherton Library
GGS Out and About
Free Subscription to GRAND Magazine

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2009/2010 Calendar

Date
       Host      
Presenter

Nov 1     Janet      Susan B
Jan 10    Lisa        Patty Wipfler
Mar 1     Marilyn    Victoria Z.

Nov 1, 2009 Meeting

Ten Non-Rules for Creative Grandmas!

Our November 1 meeting will be hosted by Janet in Los Altos. We'll enjoy a discussion on creativity with GaGa Susan B., therapist, writing coach, and author of Writing from the Inside Out and When your Heart Speaks, Take Good Notes. Creativity is not just for writers and artists. Everyday creativity is a wonderful way to play and bond. We'll explore practical and fun ways to enrich, enlighten and empower both ourselves and our grandchildren.

The Art of Grandparenting

The Art of Grandparenting is now available. In the chapter I wrote, How to Become a Go-To Grandma, I offer seven strategies for building lasting bonds with your grandchildren. The most important lesson I've learned as a grandma is that getting time with your grandchildren requires building trust and respect with their parents. Trust is the foundation for having access to your grandchildren.

The anthology, subtitled Loving, Spoiling, Teaching and Playing with Your Grandkids, includes 20 chapters by "new" and "seasoned" grandparent authors. To order the book, click here.

You can purchase copies at our November 1 meeting.

ArtofGrandparenting

Guest Writers Wanted

Do you have a topic related to grandparenting you'd like to write about? If so, let me know and you can write a post for my blog. One of our GaGas, Jan, wrote a post about turning 60.

Please continue sending me emails with fun activities you're doing so I can include them in this newsletter.



Greetings!Donne

Lately I've been meeting a lot of long-distance grandmas. Mary Lou showed me a photo of her 18-month-old grandson who lives in Australia. She's only visited him twice but they Skype every Sunday. Mary Lou is not alone. Nearly half of today's grandparents live more than 200 miles away from at least one of their grandchildren, according to an AARP Survey.
Being a grandma takes energy. Being a long-distance grandma takes energy, determination and creativity. Of all the factors that can interfere with building a relationship with your grandchildren---busy schedules, lack of energy, health problems, lack of money, divorce, and distance---the biggest barrier is living too far away.
If you can't reach out and touch your grandchildren as often as you'd like, then capitalize on your other four senses. Use sight, sound, taste and smell to create connections with your grandchildren. And if you're lucky enough to live close by, you can hand deliver some of the projects listed below.

In Sisterhood,


 SigColor


Making Sense of Long Distance Grandparenting

Use Your Senses

Sight

Living in the digital age offers us a vast array of visual media for connecting with our grandchildren.
  • Photos: Make a photo collage of yourself in different rooms in your house or at some of your favorite places and laminate it for a grandchild's placemat.
  • Email: Send ecards for Valentine's Day, Passover, St. Patrick's Day, Halloween or when the seasons change.
  • Fax: Ask your children to fax your grandchild's art, then send them a picture of it on your refrigerator.
  • Skype or iChat: Use Web cams and make free calls over the Internet while you view each other on your computer monitors. Skype is free, easy to download and use, and it works with most computers. You'll need a good quality web camera (under $80) and a mic for each computer. Then you can read books together, put on finger puppet shows or even have tea parties.
  • Text message: Learn how to text and your busy older grandchildren will think you're cool.
  • Snail Mail: That old-fashioned letter in the mailbox still beats all the other communication forms and may even seem like a real novelty to your tech savvy grandchildren. Draw pictures on the envelope incorporating the theme on the stamp. Make your own cards and send them with tidbits of family history, anecdotes or connections to their history. Don't tell them the entire story at once, especially when they're young. Build the story over time so that it becomes their own. Children love hearing stories about their own parents when they were young.
  • Writing: Create your own book with a personalized story that you and your grandchild take turns adding to and then mail back and forth to each other as you each add to the story.
  • Start a journal with stories of your visits together. Put in little mementos and drawings from the activities you do. Read it to them when you see them again.
  • Packages: Send a craft project with a suggestion like "once you finish these crafts, send me one to display for all my friends to see." Send back a picture of the craft where you placed it.
  • Notes: At the end of your visit with your grandchild, write short notes on Post-it notes before you leave. Hide them all over the house for your grandchild to find after you leave.
 
Sound
  • Phone calls: If you can schedule regular times to call your grandchildren, they'll look forward to speaking with you. Keep communication frequent even if it's brief. Check in with them after they've returned from school and have some down time. Stay away from closed questions like "How was school?" or "What did you learn today?" Ask open-ended questions about specific subjects, assignments or relationships. Read a story, sing a song, ask riddles or tell knock-knock jokes. Play games on the phone like Twenty Questions or do crossword puzzles. Leave silly phone messages or musical phone messages on their answering machine.
  • CD: Ask your grandchildren's parents what music they're listening to and burn a CD of their favorite artists. Burn a CD of you singing lullabies, or children's songs or reading a bedtime story.
 
Taste
Goodies: Send a photo of yourself cooking your favorite recipe and include it along with the goodies you bake.
Send a jar with the exact number of M&M's as days that are left until your next visit. Tell your grandchild to eat one a day until you are together again. (Check with the parents first.)
 
Smell
Send your grandchild a homemade "hug" that he or she can wrap around him or herself. Cut a piece of material 1 yard long and 4-5 inches wide. Put a tiny dab of your favorite perfume on the material. Trace your hands onto 2 pieces of felt and cut them out. Glue the hands to the ends of the material and decorate the hug.
When you send letters, put a tiny dab of your signature fragrance on the envelope so your grandchild will associate that fragrance with you.
 
For more creative ideas, check out Grandloving, a website created by a mother-in-law, daughter-in-law team of pre-school teachers. Sue Johnson, a long-distance grandmother, and her daughter-in-law, Julie Carlson also co-wrote a book:  Grandloving: Making Memories with Your Grandchildren-A World Away or Next Door. Their book is filled with creative activities for connecting with your grandchildren. In the chapter, "More Mailbox Treasures," all of the projects can be mailed in a 9x12-inch envelope.
 
Use Your Common Sense

Keep up on your grandchild's developmental stages and interests. Don't take it personally when they don't feel like talking or have much to say. Ask when is a better time to call. Remember, each step you take is money in the relationship bank.
 
Distance is a genuine challenge for any relationship. But don't be put off by it or use it as an excuse. And don't wait for your grandchildren to initiate the contact. It will take energy, creativity and determination to keep up with their lives. The payoff will be a bond between you and your grandchildren that will have a positive impact on them throughout their lives.
 
If you have some creative ways you stay in touch over the miles, post them on Big Tent for all our members to share.
 



Book Signing at Atherton Library

On December 4 from 9 to 10am I'll be giving a presentation at the Atherton Library titled: Be a Go-to Grandparent, Whether You're Near or Far. I'll share some of my strategies from The Art of Grandparenting on how to build lifelong meaningful relationships with your children and grandchildren. It's free and open to the public. I'd love to see you there. Please share this information with any local grandmas you know.

Atherton Library
2 Dinkelspiel Station
Atherton, CA
650.328.2422
 


GaGa Sisterhood Out and About

During the past few weeks I've been busy spreading the GaGa gospel and people have been listening!
  • September 29 and 30 I won free attendance in a class called Encore! Elegant Skills for Powerful Presentations by Angela DeFinis Communications. I spent two days honing my speaking skills and watching myself on video-tape. The class was a powerful learning experience and I was grateful for the opportunity to develop some new techniques. Angela wrote a wonderful post about me and the GaGa Sisterhood.
  • October 18 I participated in The New Mom Fair sponsored by Parenting on the Peninsula. I met lots of new moms with their adorable babies and several grandmas. It was fun to see the reactions as they stopped by my table to find out about the GaGa Sisterhood.
  • October 21 I spent the morning at Curves in Los Altos talking to grandmas while they did their circuit training. The studio owner, Mimi Ly, is donating a Curves prize for a drawing at our November 1 meeting. It was my first time at Curves and I had a great time. The women are all so friendly and I got a great workout in just 30 minutes!




Free Subscription to GRAND Magazine

Several years ago, I discovered a wonderful resource for grandparents---GRAND Magazine. Last year GRAND switched from a printed format to an online magazine with live links. What I like about GRAND is that the founder and publisher, Christine Crosby, is also a grandmother and truly understands the role. She says that becoming a grandparent transformed her life beyond measure.
 
GRAND's mission is to provide grandparents of all ages and in all stages of life both information and inspiration. They've created a magazine that celebrates the joys and tackles the challenges of one of life's sweetest experiences---having grandchildren.

GRAND Magazine is now offering free subscriptions to readers of my blog. To get your free subscription, click here. The August issue has a story about the GaGa Sisterhood in their "grand central" section. Click here to read.